The Journey Ahead
by bingewatcher
Summary: Becky and Adam continue to have a strong relationship the summer after graduation. Now, they were to be separated because of college. Could they endure the challenges that were to come? Becky/Adam pairing. Contains sexual content. (paused)
1. Goodbye, For Now

The day had come.

This was it.

Adam and her had been together since junior year and now they were a week away from starting their freshmen year of college. Only problem being that they would be at different schools, in different countries.

Becky had wanted to stay so bad with Adam as the mere thought of being away with him made her sad. The summer before senior year she had left to Florida for a lifeguard job, and it was difficult to say the least. This summer she had stayed in Toronto as Adam was getting his chest reconstruction surgery and she would be leaving to Florida late August.

It was cheaper for her to attend school in the sunny state, as she was a resident of Florida. It went for Adam as staying in Canada would be cheaper for him, but he had somehow convinced his mother to let him transfer to Florida after two years.

They had spent the whole summer together as they dreaded the day that now arrived.

She was sitting on the front porch as her father, brother, and Adam packed up the finally things in the moving van; the whole baker family would be moving back to Florida.

Her dark blue eyes focused on her boyfriend who was talking to her father. He stood tall as he had grown from the t-shots he began taking mid-senior year. She enjoyed his transition as much as she did. All the simple things from his voice deepening just the slightest to the muscle gain made him smile from ear to ear and she loved when he was happy.

They were, no are, so happy together but in the bottom of her heart this scared her to no end. Only seeing each other physically every so often is dreadful as they were always a very touchy couple; not that they have ever been physically intimate yet. He had never even spent a night with her, as she preferred to move slow and not be tempted.

At one point she wanted to give up her value of abstinence as it got harder to push away from make out sessions and how his hands roamed her body when they got carried away. She bit her lip as Adam walked towards her, he had a smile as he tried his best to remain happy these last few hours they had together.

"You okay, Becks?" He kneeled in front of her and cursed at himself knowing this was a ridiculous question. Of course she wasn't okay and he wasn't okay.

He wanted to scream from the fact that they had to be apart. He wanted so bad to leave with her but his parents couldn't afford the tuition that came with studying out of the country, not for the first few years anyways as Drew was already studying out of the country; he was settled in California.

Becky's head shook and she glanced down to his necklace that held his promise ring and his favorite dog tag. Her fingers reached out and touched the brass. "I hate this." She muttered under her breath. Using such a distasteful word disgusted her but there was no other word that described the situation. She truly hated having to leave him.

He exhaled and leaned over to kiss her ear, mumbling a few words before helping her stand.

::

Becky was biting hard on her bottom lip as she tried to hold in a gasp.

They were in one of those rare occurrences of being in bed together; making out. There regular location would usually be the couch as to ensure things wouldn't escalate. But the situation being that her parents were downstairs, they had no other choice but to go to her room.

Adam's lips were sucking on the skin of her neck. Her hands were in his hair, gently grasping, and his hands were placed on the bed as he held his weight off her.

The sensations that ran through him when they did this were magic. His hormones were off the charts but Becky's moral standings would keep him from doing anything physical with her. He respected that about her and would never push her to do anything, but at this moment he definitely wanted to ravish her and prove how much he loved her. But all he could do was leave a light hickey on her neck as to claim her as his.

Their lips reconnected in what seemed to be a gentle kiss but Becky soon open her mouth and their tongues made contact, making Adam moan. Her hands now were caressing his biceps and soon his shoulders, followed by his chest. Shivers ran down his spine as her hands made way under his shirt.

"Becky.." He pulled their lips away in hesitance but knew he had to be one to end this now before they got to far, "Nickel." This was their safe word that they had agreed on as it usually took them only five seconds to go from sweet to _hot._

A smile was on her lips as she looked up at him; his hair was all over the place and his cheeks were red from the heat of the make-out plus the heat of the house as they had no conditioning in the house. "Sorry, babe." She breathed out and sat up, she was out of breath.

"It's okay, it's hard to resist I know." He smirked and received a small shove from her. He looked over at her and took in her appearance.

She wore a bright yellow sundress with a thin belt around her waist. A flower crown was around her forehead and she wore no earrings but sported her cross around the neck. He could see the sadness behind her eyes and he found himself getting hit with a wave of emotion.

Becky looked over at him and he gave her a forced smile, he was right on the brink of crying and she knew it. He had kept himself together the whole summer as he tried his best to enjoy the time they had now, as she tried too. She was just more prone of crying in those moments where they did discuss it.

Now it was his turn to shed tears.

She reached up to touch his smooth face, caressing his cheeks, and brought his head down to her chest. His arms went around her frame and his shoulders shook as he finally let himself cry.

::

They held hands walking down the stairs. Now it was time to say goodbye.

It was a bittersweet moment as she looked around the house she shared many memories with Adam with. Their first dinner date with the family, the time they had fallen asleep on the couch on finals week, and that time they played the ground is lava.

"Say goodbye, buttercup." Mr. Baker spoke out towards the couple. "I'll see you on thanksgiving, Adam." They shook hands. Mr. Baker wasn't very happy of the relationship at first, and was still hesitant. Both Becky's parents seemed a little more accepting as they noticed how happy Becky has been.

Adam turned around to face Becky once more and she jumped into his arms, embracing him in a warm hug. Her feet were off the ground as Adam had a few inches on her. Becky smiled up at him as she was settled on the floor once more.

They had so much ahead of them and they couldn't wait to get through it; together.

"I love you." He whispered to her before kissing her lips very gently. She returned the words to him once they pulled away.

Once they were both outside, they shared another hug and a quick kiss before Becky made her way inside the car. Adam waved to everyone as they backed out the drive way and soon enough the car was driving away.

Once alone, Adam looked towards the nearly empty house and sighed.

* * *

_hey guys! this is my new story focusing on beckdam during college. _

_i just have a few comments to add. this story can be considered a sort of prequel to my trilogy of "Sneaking Around" but it's not necessary for you to read those stories in order to enjoy this one. for those who have read "Sneaking Around," "Memorable Christmas," and "Unexpected Surprise" i hope you can enjoy this story just as much. there are a few differences between some things mentioned in those stories than in this one, but like i said this isn't necessarily a sequel._

_also, i will be doing a lot of skipping around time wise as i want to stuff four years of their college experience into a story and i wouldn't like to make this 50 chapters long. i can skip from weeks to months in general, maybe even a year if i want to. just to let you know._

_i hope you do enjoy this story as i personally am writing this just for the joy of it. i would appreciate reviews for ideas on what to write about or what i can adjust._

_thank you for reading!_


	2. Miserable

"Come on, bro! You can have some fun at the party." Drew was trying so hard to get his brother out of the house.

The past few weeks were difficult for his little brother, he wouldn't leave the house unless he was going to class. Whenever he did talk to Becky, he seemed happy but Becky could only speak for so long as she had taken up a lot of stuff to do at campus and slept whatever chance she got.

"You told me Becky was doing something tonight, so you should too!" Drew pulled Adam up by his arm. "Come on, I'm leaving on Sunday."

Drew was still studying in Cali and was only here for a few days. He was a little disappointed his brother wasn't giving him the time of day.

Adam's baby blue eyes looked up and nodded. He felt bad now that he thought about it. Drew had gotten into town this morning and Adam hadn't really caught up with him. "What kind of party is this?"

"Your favorite." Adam grinned, as he new this party would brighten up his mood.

::

"Oh my god, he's so hot!" Christina yelled out. She was a friend of Becky's, as she knew a lot of people already coming into the school as the majority of her old high school friends enrolled into the University of Tampa.

Becky was showing her a picture of Adam and her friend's reaction made her smile. She knew he was attractive to most people, especially now as his features became much stronger. How she would hop on a plane right now if she could to just go see his face in person.

It was tough these first weeks away from him. The Skype dates and phone calls weren't enough, especially since it was hard to make time as her classes conflicted with his. Whenever she had free time, he had class, and vice versa.

"Does he meet expectations in the sack?" Another friend of hers asked, and Becky blushed.

They were at this sorority's party and they had settled outside on the porch. Her friends knew she was very stuck to her belief but with alcohol in their systems they couldn't resist asking. Unlike them, Becky was just sipping some water.

"We haven't done anything, and you know that." She shrugged.

Her friend perked up an eyebrow and giggled, "I give you props, and how you resist that I wouldn't know."

::

"Baby?! Can you hear me now?" Adam shouted as loud as he could but the music was blasting.

Drew had gotten them into an underground party that had much similarity to a rave. They were a few hours in so Adam had had his few shares of drinks but wasn't comfortable enough to take any form of drugs unlike Drew and Dave. Not to say he wasn't a little drunk.

His best way to talk on the phone would be to find a bathroom, which was hard but he finally found one. "I'm sorrrrrry, babe. I wasn't expecting a call." He explained to her and tried his best to cover up his stumbling words.

"It's okay. I've just missed you and have been thinking of you a lot lately, especially tonight." She spoke with honesty as the recent discussion with her friend brought down her mood.

Becky had decided to leave the party early for that reason as she wanted nothing more than to be in bed and talk to her love, but it didn't seem that would happen as Adam was at a party of his own. "But if you're busy that's okay, I can call you in the morning."

Adam shook his head and sighed, "I'm just a little out of it." He heard nothing on the other end and knew Becky would be disappointed. She preferred it when he didn't drink, and when he was around her he usually wouldn't

But with everything going on lately, he was struggling and this was a way to deal with it. Better than drugs he thought.

"Then I definitely prefer talking to you tomorrow. Probably tomorrow night since I wouldn't want to wake you from a hangover." She was a little annoyed. She knew she didn't have control of his actions but talking to someone who was drunk was something she wanted to avoid.

"Baby, don't be mad. I just wanted to enjoy myself and Drew is here so why not have some fun. I like to have fun." Adam was starting to ramble on, "I have fun with you sober but you aren't here. And I want you here, I want my babe here or I want to be there. You're my home. I want my home."

Her lips formed into a small smile, she couldn't help herself. Just picturing the cute face he makes when he rambles about something makes her smile, adding that to the fact he called her his home made her heart skip a beat.

"I want you too." She replied to him and felt a rush go through her at how vague that was, "Not like that. I like want you here but not in that way." Becky was blushing to herself and could just imagine the grin on his face.

And she was right he was grinning. "Oh, so you don't want me want me? Because I want you want you." His eyes shut as he thought of her. He has told her this various times before of how he does desire her but she isn't much to reciprocate, as she wants to keep control of it.

She scoffed and glanced at the door in hopes her roommate wouldn't walk in during this conversation. Not that the conversation was awkward, just she tried her best to avoid it as it was getting harder and harder to push him away physically.

"I love you so I'll wait." Adam added to the conversation. It was what he would always say to her when this topic was brought up.

"And I love you but I don't want to speak to a drunk Adam." Becky sighed and found she glancing at the picture on her desk of her boyfriend. Oh how she missed him.

Adam scratched his head and saw Drew was calling his phone. "I should go then."

They said their goodbyes. Becky lied in bed and Adam pumping up to the music.

* * *

_Continue to enjoy the story. next chapter would be a big leap in time. read, enjoy, review. thank you. x._


	3. Far Too Long

He was giddy.

It has been almost three months since he has seen Becky in person. He was going to Florida to celebrate an American Thanksgiving. She gets about a week off of school, but him being in Canada he doesn't get the same time off. His mom wasn't happy he would have to miss about three days of classes but he didn't care.

He told her he would pay for the ticket himself if he had to since he had started working around the same time school started. He worked on a radio set as an assistant, it wasn't the greatest job but it would give him experience into what he was majoring in.

She had let him pay for this ticket as she would pay for the one in December. Now he was boarding off the plane and felt his palms begin to sweat.

Adam had no idea why he was so nervous but he was more excited than nervous. He couldn't wait to hold his girlfriend in his arms.

"Adam!" He heard a familiar voice and saw the blonde, instantly smiling. They couldn't approach yet as he had to walk out the gate.

As soon as he was out, Becky ran to embrace him in the same way she embraced him when they said goodbye. His arms were tight around her and they kissed sweetly with a smile on both of their lips.

::

"Are we going to have any privacy today at all?" Adam asked his girlfriend as he settled his stuff in her room.

They had come directly to her parent's home from the airport. Since they never had shared a bed together for a night, it made sense he would sleep in the guest room. But since more of their family was coming for the feast, he had to settle with his girlfriend. Becky lived on campus but her parents did have a room settled for her whenever she came to see them.

"Not really. You've never experienced thanksgiving like this before. The day before thanksgiving, we have to prepare food and relatives come to town." She paused as she watched him pull out his phone charger. It was weird for him to stay in her room; this would be the first they would do this. "Then tomorrow we just eat the whole day. Black Friday is shopping day."

Adam looked back at her once his phone was plugged in. This was either the perfect time for them to see each other or the worst. The lack of privacy only bothered him a little as they would be sharing the nights together, but he would of have liked to explore the city with her since it was his first time here.

He removed his jacket, finding it so warm compared to Toronto at this time. "No worries, I bought some shirts you could wear for tomorrow and the next few days." Becky said, knowing her boyfriend would push away the fact the weather is so different here.

She was sporting shorts and a t-shirt, something he would never see on her that often but he liked it. Him on the other hand had come in a jacket, long sleeve, and jeans.

"Why don't we get you changed?" Becky asked him with a grin. She wanted to see him shirtless since he seemed a little more toned than before. Adam just smiled as her hands went to the button of his shirt.

Things soon shifted and they were taking advantage of the time they had right now. Adam was beneath her as they kissed intensely. She was straddling him and her hands roamed his upper body. Their breaths were uneven as they deepened the kiss further.

His hands removed her t-shirt, now both shirtless. This was the most exposed they would ever get before pushing away. Didn't seem like it this time around as Adam flipped them over and let his lips descend down her body. It must have been all the past few months without contact that kept Becky from speaking up. She let her boyfriend kiss her all over and let his hands reach for the bra straps.

Right on the verge of having her chest exposed, she let herself speak up to stop him. He rolled off her and buried his face into the pillow to keep himself from looking, "I'm sorry, Becks."

"It's okay." She rubbed his back after adjusting her bra. She remained shirtless as she begins tending to his back as they both tried to control there breathing. "It's my fault too. Your hands just feel really nice." Becky whispers in his ear and that makes him chuckle.

Her hands relaxed him but nothing could relax the attention he needed between his legs. A year on t-shots can drastically change his body, and what lied between his legs had changed. There wasn't much there but he could get hard and he was _hard_. Becky knew this was changing but he wasn't the most open about it since they weren't intimate he found no real reason to tell her.

Becky's hands wandered down the back of her partner and they lingered around his waist. She beckoned for him to flip around and he did so. He looked up at her with curious eyes as her eyes wandered his body, looking for changes.

Her fingertips ran along his waist once more as some hair was appearing below his belly button, leading to where she was yet to see.

Adam's fingers lingered on his girlfriend's face, running along her cheek and pushing a strand of hair behind her ear. Her face was just a shade darker from all the sun the past months and he found it very appealing. "You're beautiful." He murmurs to her under his breathe.

To him, she was the most beautiful girl that lived on the planet. He constantly reminded her of this after she had admitted to him that at one point in her life she had thought very lowly of herself. Never again would he let her think that way.

His other hand ran down her flat stomach as he admired the moles that were splattered all over her body. He looked up at her with admiration in his eyes before shifting his body down to kiss her chest, slowly making his way down as his hand rested on her thigh.

She sighed in pleasure as his gentle kisses turned into wet kisses when making his way up her body once more.

At that moment she wanted nothing more than to give up her pledge to god.

* * *

_hope you're enjoying the story. as you can see this story will focus a lot on the college journey and their sexual experiences with one another as becky continues to stick to her word-for now ;). check out my other stories and my beckdam/fadam trilogy if you please. read and review, enjoy. xx._


	4. Second Base

After helping her mother buy groceries for the thanksgiving feast, she had some time to take Adam to campus.

Her parent's home was only a twenty-minute drive from the campus, but she had no choice but to live on campus for the first few years because of her scholarship. She drove to her dorm rooms and gave Adam a tour of how she usually got ready in the morning.

"Unfortunately I have to share a bathroom with ten other girls but I'm use to it now." Becky stated and Adam grinned at the doubt of all those naked girls roaming the hallways. "Our room has a small kitchen though, so I can make all my home made goodies."

Adam chuckled, "Is your roommate here?"

The blonde shook her head, "Mostly everyone is gone back home for the holiday. That's why it's so quiet. It's weird." She led them inside her room, "Ta da!"

His eyes glanced around. She had shown him the room over a Skype call but now he was here. There was a bunk bed, two desks, and the kitchen she mentioned. Along with a closet they had to share.

"Wow, this isn't bad.. But the bed situation?" He perked a brow and pointed at the beds. She had mentioned it to him over a phone call that her roommate didn't share many values as she did. She would bring a guy along here and there.

She shrugged and crossed her legs, "I would leave the room and go to Tiffany's room that's just a few doors down. She doesn't have a roommate so she lets me stay there for the night."

He let out a small laugh, which must be awkward. He sat down on the swivel chair and found a few letters that he had sent to her. Every once and a while they would exchange letters; Becky found it very romantic and he loved pleasing his lady.

Becky watched her boyfriend and smiled to herself. There were so many times she had imagined him just barging into the door and settling him as it was his own place. Where he would come over frequently, so frequently her roommate would get annoyed. But that weren't to happen.

"Hey, you alright?" Adam's voice broke her out the trance as he had moved to sit beside her on her bed. "If you're sad, I'm sad."

She pouted and leaned over to rest her head on his shoulder, "I just miss you so much. Now that you're here I can't help but feel sad that you're going to leave again." Her hand reached for his in need for comfort.

He sighed and gave her head a gentle kiss. He didn't want to dwell on leaving and he told her that back after their steamy make out session, but he didn't want her holding back her feelings.

"It's okay, love." Adam spoke with confidence, "We'll be okay."

::

"Wow, this is insane."

Adam looked around the studio in awe as Becky just watched him.

His major was Radio Broadcasting/Broadcasting Journalism, as he loved hosting "Mano a Mano" with Dave. It was his one true interest. A reason they had both decided to attend this school, or soon attend, was it held a great radio studio for Adam to try out.

Becky had befriended someone whom worked in this area and he had her pass through during the break. Watching Adam now, she knew it was a great idea. His hands were everywhere in exploration, he looked like a little kid who was just given a new toy.

"You like it?" Becky wrapped her arms around Adam from behind as he was trying on the headphones. Her chin was on his shoulder and she smiled when she saw his smile.

"I do. I love it. I can't wait to come here.. Even though it's really hot like ninety percent of the time."

"Gives you a reason to have your shirt off, though." She joked and he laughed with a nod.

He mumbled a thank you, and an I love you, before kissing her lips tenderly. They stayed in there for a while longer.

::

It was now the end of a long day and Adam was exhausted. He had woken up early to catch his flight and he hadn't had a single moment of rest the whole day.

Now he was in the bathroom getting dressed before joining Becky in her bedroom. It was going to be a strange experience as their relationship had moved slowly throughout. They had fallen asleep constantly on couches before, but in the pajama apparel in a bed for a whole night was something different.

He washed his tired face before looking at himself in the mirror, taking in his changing features.

Becky was in bed by the time he went back to her room. She was in a night gown as it was rather hot and her back was turned to the door. As he walked in, he smiled at the sight of her. He had missed her dearly and would now have her in his arms for the whole night.

Her head turned just enough to see the figure that was joining her in bed. The lights were off but she smiled at him as she felt his warmth. Her back continued to face him as he spooned her.

"This okay?" Adam asked in a hushed tone against her ear.

She mumbled a yes as her hand traveled up the length of his arm, feeling the fabric of his shirt. "It's okay to take that off, Adam." She turned her head in hopes of seeing him and grinned at his courtesy, she knew he slept without a shirt.

Adam didn't have to be told twice before discarding his shirt and throwing it aside; at that point Becky had turned and was watching him in the dark. The light of the moon made it possible to see each other just enough.

"You just wanted a show, huh?" He smirked and she giggled. She did enjoy the view. As he lied back on his side, her hand was on his chest. Her slender fingers outlined his scars. They were still pretty evident as he had the procedure done only six months ago.

Becky exhaled and looked up to meet his gaze, "I missed touching you." Her fingers were now on his toned stomach and found them resting beneath the waistline of his pajama pants.

His eyebrows raised in curiosity. She had been very touchy and physical this whole day. The earlier make out was the furthest they had gone and she had pushed him away, but when they started up again their hands had gone everywhere. _Everywhere_. Only stopping when the realization hit that her parents were downstairs.

Now, everyone was asleep besides them and how he wanted to continue. But he knew they would have to talk about it beforehand. He didn't want her regretting anything afterwards just because they got into the heat of the moment. Now thinking about it, he was curious.

"I have a question, love." Adam started off, his body scooting over closer to hers. "Earlier, we kind of went further than usual."

Becky nodded and knew he would bring this up eventually. Sure, she wanted to talk about it as well but he was more open to this conversation then she was; another reason why they meshed so well.

"I just want to know if you regret it in any way or if we should control ourselves a bit more next time." His words came out slow and again hushed, being careful not to be too loud.

She pondered on the thought and shook her head, "I don't regret it. I really liked it actually." She paused as she thought about his follow up question. It was so difficult to maintain control when they haven't seen each other in so long. All their needs were thrown at once and honestly, she wanted to be on his lips 24/7. "I've been thinking."

Becky seemed to sit up and reached over to turn on her small lamp. She looked at her boyfriend who had an open expression on his face, making her smile. "What if we were to explore other _physical_ things?" Her voice came a little choked up in shyness.

His expression changed to one of surprise, "You mean like second base?" Adam smiled as Becky turned a darker shade of red. "Or third?" He wiggled his eyebrows as he began to sit up as well.

"I'm serious, Adam." She huffed. She enjoyed his jokes but she wanted his real answer.

Adam reached out to stroke her cheek; "I would love to do that with you. You're the only person I want anything physical with and I'm willing to go at whatever pace you prefer."

Her smile widened and they leaned in for a gentle kiss, soon pulling away to rest their forehead's against one another's.

"I love you."

"And I really love you."


	5. Thanksgiving Dinner

"Amen." The Baker's plus friends said in unison.

Adam had his eyes open while watching everyone prays, examining every single person's expression. He had made eye contact with one of Becky's cousin's that she had introduced as Veronica. She was attractive and had her eyes on him since they had met.

It made Adam uncomfortable so he had clung to Becky the whole day. He was going to tell her but thought it be better after dinner.

They all sat at this huge dinner table and were passing food to one another. Adam reached over to rest his hand on Becky's knee, Becky paying no mind to it as he always did this. She simply grazed her fingers over his hand as they spoke to one another throughout the dinner.

Once the main portion of dinner was over with, many guests left. It was past eight o'clock when he had gone upstairs to change into something more comfortable as he was going to go out with Becky for some early black Friday shopping.

"Oh, my bad!" Adam had almost run into someone coming back down the stairs. It was Veronica. _Damn it. _

Her lips were formed into a grin. Yes, the guy in front of her was extremely attractive; very much Becky's type, and her type. They had always crushes on the same people and now as she looked at Adam, she wanted him.

She wasn't as stuck to her belief as her cousin, and as much as she liked her cousin the fact it was her boyfriend wouldn't keep her away. "Adam, right?"

He nodded, "I gotta get going. Becky's waiting for me."

Veronica's perfectly tweezed eyebrow perked up and she stepped closer to him, going up one step on the stairs. "This will only take a few minutes." She reached out for his belt buckle and tugged him closer.

Adam was freaking out and stood there wide-eyed, as if frozen. _What does she think she's doing? _ His body shivered when he felt her fingers inside the waistband of his boxers. "Back off." He tried to move away but felt an urge run through him. _What am I thinking? _

"Back off, Veronica." She was standing in his way but he pushed her to the side in the least aggressive way he could. He glanced back and she had a devious grin on her face as if she knew what affect she had caused.

He had reached the living room and everything seemed normal. Did that just really happen? It was unbelievable someone that close to Becky would try to hook up with her boyfriend just up the stairs.

Becky stood outside zipping up her light sweater when the front door opened. "Hey, baby. Where's your sweater?" She quickly asked. Even if it were Florida, it would get chilly after a certain hour.

Her eyes then noticed his, he seemed confused and out of it. "Baby, hello?" She cupped his face and it brought him back to reality.

"Babe, uh.." He started off and stood closer to her, already feeling the chill of outside. He knew already how she would react. As little as she let it show, she was the jealous type.

After Imogen had revealed to him that she had feelings for him the summer before his last year in high school, he had told Becky. Becky wouldn't let him near Imogen in any way and he agreed to it; he would risk losing all his friends as long as he had the love of his life.

He blinked a few times then look down, "Your cousin Veronica.." Pausing, he finally looked her in the eye, "She was hitting on me, I guess? She kinda touched me I guess, so I pushed her away and came out here." Starting off slowly and quickly talking in the end, he stared at Becky who wasn't amused.

"I'll go get your sweater." Becky said calmly as she rubbed his arm and Adam knew better than to stop her from going inside.

Becky was protective of all the people she cared about, and Adam was the one she will go through anything for. There wasn't any way she would let this cousin of hers do this to her boyfriend. She wasn't surprised as her cousin always got herself into family drama.

Veronica looked up from her phone as she sat in the living room alone. Becky also knew better than to cause a scene, she would just deal with it later.

::

Adam was sipping on a milkshake as he walked around the Tampa mall himself. Becky had gone off who knows where so he decided to go into some stores of his own and purchased some t-shirts and a sweater.

He was happy that Becky seemed calm about the whole Veronica situation. There was something itching in the back of his mind that he should tell her he was tempted but at the same time he knew it wasn't necessary for him to tell. He had pushed her away because Becky is whom he wants everything with.

From kisses to marriage, all he wanted to explore that with was Becky. Come to think of it, he had never even said this to her. He wasn't one to speak about the future that often, especially if the future consisted of more than two days of planning; she was the planner and he would just follow.

He wanted to buy his lady something nice but nothing came to mind. He wandered around exploring for a gift idea, but he found better faster. She was with a group of people their age, and they looked somewhat familiar.

A face he recognized as Christina, Becky's closest friend, who would post pictures of them together all the time on hastygram.

"Becks?" Adam slowly approached them and his girlfriend smiled at him.

Becky formally introduced the small ring of friends she had run into at the mall. Christina was the first of course; she had very tan skin and long black hair. Next was Brian whom was a mutual from Christina who shared many interests as Adam, including skateboarding. Last was Robert. This guy was awry to Adam. Becky didn't seem that close to him and Robert would just longly stare at Becky.

This bothered Adam to no end. By the time they had said their goodbyes Adam had his arm protectively around Becky's waist and gave Robert a cold stare when he tried to give Becky a hug goodbye.

After walking away from the group, the blonde looked at Adam with a skeptical look. "What was that about?"

She moves to lean against the wall and Adam shrugs, moving to stand in front of her, "That Robert guy, I don't like him."

Her brow goes up and she glances down at the bags, rummaging through them to see what he's bought. "He tried kissing me once."

Adam furrows his brows in astonishment, why didn't she mention this before?

"When?"

"A few months ago. He had a few beers and tried but I said no."

She continues looking through his bags, ensuring he bought his right sizes, but the bags are soon moved away, "So, let me get this straight; He tried kissing you a few months back and you never mention it and you still hang out with him?"

"Yes, why, Adam?" Becky stands up straight, a little confused as to what he seems upset about.

"What do you mean why?" His eyes are intense and he pauses to see if she can figure out what's wrong with the situation but she doesn't speak up. "I just told you what happened with your cousin without having to think twice. And I even ended friendships with people who formed crushes on me and you don't see why I'm upset?"

Her eyes look up at him and he can't seem to read them. "Nothing happened, Adam. I barely even talked to him tonight."

He shook his head in amazement. It amazed him how sometimes she could still bring out that hypocritical side of her and she was unaware.

Feeling a light graze on his cheek, he felt himself turn to mush at the touch. But looking at her expression, he could tell she still didn't understand the situation. Stepping back he started walking away.

"Adam?"

"I'll see you at home."

* * *

_posting two chapters every time i do post. this story has expanded GREATLY, longer than i had initially planned so posting 2 chapters every time is best. please review to hear your thoughts and __opinions! thanks. xx._


	6. Undergarments

Good thing he had a good memory or else he would have never made it back.

He took a cab and had remembered her address. She had the keys so she had driven to back home.

Adam knew walking away wouldn't help at all and he didn't want to fight as to the fact they only had a few more days together, but what she did bothered him. Add the fact she didn't realize what she was doing wrong made it worse.

Imogen and him had stopped speaking that summer because of Becky and he didn't even think twice about it. Plenty other people had hit on him, and he cut them off as Becky wished. Then Veronica came along, and he knew Becky would deal with that too.

Now he hears this guy tried kissing the love of his life and he had never known about it until two months later? Why hadn't she told him? Did she like him too?

"Fuck!" He mumbled under his breath.

Becky was a mess in her room. She had called Adam continuously but he had left his phone charging in her room. She had no idea where he was or if he were to make it home safe.

Tears ran down her face in worry and sadness. She hated when he walked away from conversations with her but that's how he coped; he would walk away then come back when he had his emotions under control.

What had she done wrong? Robert wasn't a problem. Her only desire was Adam. She only wanted his lips, his touch, _him; _only him. She wanted her Adam.

When she heard the doorbell, her heart skipped a beat and she ran down the stairs in hopes it was the freckled boy she loved so much.

And it was.

::

"Explain then, baby. Tell me why you're so upset."

Adam was sitting on the bed and Becky stood between his legs. She looked down at him as her hands tangled in his hair, trying to soothe him. The t-shots would make his emotions range and change so quickly; this was a way she knew she could calm him.

"Just, it bothered me why you didn't tell me about him doing that. I tell you everything." The baby blue eyes that always shone happiness and that had shone anger a few hours back now conveyed sadness.

A frown appeared on her face, as she is the reason he is feeling sad. "I just didn't want to upset you… We're over a thousand miles apart and the first thing you would have wanted to do is kiss me and made sure I was okay."

He nodded in agreement and she continued, "Then you would of wanted to punch him in the face, which I wouldn't have liked." He opens his mouth to speak but Becky shakes her head, continuing. "Neither of which you could have done with the distance. I only speak to him because he's in our group of friends and I only speak to him when I need to."

"Introducing you to him made him realize you are real and I am really taken."

This makes Adam smile up at her for just a second, "But that doesn't mean he wont try to get with you again."

She sighs and lets her insecurities out in the open, "You think I'm not worried that someone over there in Canada wants to be with you? I am but I trust you and you should trust me. Your lips are the only ones I want."

Again, he smiles. Adam then slowly starts to stand up and doesn't exchange any words as he leans in to kiss her. She eagerly kisses back with a smile.

"By the way, Veronica is never going to be here when you're here." She grins. No way is she letting her man being touched by anyone else.

All Adam can do is chuckle at how satisfied she looks and he nods. They kiss once more before noticing the time. They were out all night shopping and it took him a few hours to make it back to her place, it was almost time for the sun to rise so both were exhausted.

::

Both awoke a few hours later after sleeping from Becky's father yelling they'll be back later, followed by a slam.

He clearly wasn't too happy they had to share a room together.

Looking over to his right, he smiled at Becky whom still had her eyes closed. He got up and went to use the restroom, feeling free from prying eyes since no one was home.

"Adam, come back." Becky groaned out once she saw a figure by the door.

Locking the door, he glanced back at the beauty in bed. He had no idea why they had never shared a bed before these past few days but now he didn't want to fall asleep without her.

Becky suddenly felt a weight on her and she opened her eyes to see her shirtless boyfriend on top of him. "Hey there, you aren't tired?"

He shook his head and was amused by how tired she sounded. "We're home alone."

"We're home alone?" She repeated his words, wondering what significance this had.

She soon felt his hand pushing at the strap of her nightgown and she was hit with the realization of what he meant, "I have morning breathe, Adam." She covered her mouth up and blushed.

Adam laughed and moved her hands away, "I don't care." She swore she had never heard his voice sound so filled with need and desire before. She didn't have time to process before his lips were on hers.

They laid vertically, Adam on top, as they intensified the kiss from gentle and sweet to passionate and intense. They were both out of breath when Adam made way to kiss her neck, something they had done various times before.

Becky let herself be vocal when he settled his lower half between her legs and his hands began pushing up her gown. He seemed to have gained a whole lot of confidence over night but Becky was still a little hesitant.

"W-Wait, you first?" She struggled to form words but got his attention when she gripped his shoulder.

Adam looked at her with a flushed face and raised a brow, "I'm already shirtless, love." Her hands were on his sweats, tugging them forward a bit and caught a glimpse of his boxers. "Are you sure?"

"Second base, right?" She smirked and he let out a small laugh before kissing her lips.

Rolling off her, he began to remove his pajama pants. There was a slight hesitance but it soon was pushed away when he knew Becky wouldn't judge in anyway. He was comfortable around her. When he had pushed them off completely, she moved to lie on her side.

The sight before her was one she had thought of plenty of times. There laid her boyfriend of almost two years in nothing but his boxers. Her eyes wandered from top to bottom; his forehead was sweaty just the slightest, face flushed, hickey on his neck, chest rising up and down as he caught his breathe, then the light hair from his belly button that led to what was hard just between his legs.

She blushed at the mere thought just making out had hardened him. Adam felt a little self-conscious under her gaze, as she didn't say anything. He was about to speak up but then Becky moved on top of him. She was straddling his lap and at an instant she bit her lip; this was new to her.

"You're perfect." Becky whispered to him before planting a small kiss on his lips.

Adam looks up at her as if he's just seen the moon for the first time. God, he loves her to death.

"You're perfect." He sits up the best he can and his hands push up the fabric of the nightgown once more.

He's in need for their skin to touch, and so is she.

But she's nervous as can be. Once vowed to stay a virgin till marriage, she was now half naked with her long-term boyfriend. Her nightgown was off and Adam hadn't stopped looking into her eyes.

Finally, his eyes looked away and gazed down at her body while his hands travelled. Sure he had seen her skin before when she wore a bikini but there was a different feeling of intimacy being in bed.

Both were just in undergarments and Adam just desired for another piece of her to be revealed.

"I love you." He whispers to her as his hands run down her arms, intertwining their fingers when their hands make contact.

"I never thought we'd be in this position before trading vows." She brings up, quickly regretting, as they have never verbally spoken of getting married. But the smile he gives her reassures her that he agrees.

"You're the one for me. I know we aren't going to make love this morning but whenever we do, before marriage or after, I won't regret it." He looks into her eyes with adoration and gives her an Eskimo kiss, brushing their noses together.

The intensity and passion has gone down, Becky can tell, but there seems to be an ache that she wants to feel again between her legs. "Second or third base?" She jokes as her hands drop his in order to reach for her bra clasp.

Adam looks at her in awe and takes a moment for him to process what's happening. Before he knows it, she's dropped her bra to the ground faster than he can answer.

Now she blushes, as she's never been this exposed with anyone. Her nipples are erect from the chill of her room and from the sensation of Adam's hands running up her sides. She bites down on her lip when his gentle hands cup both her breasts. "O-Oh, my."

He seems to have a natural talent as he squeezes and massages them. She feels just a slight embarrassment from moaning out his name but he just smiles and connects their lips once more in a heated kiss.

They flip over and he's on top once more as their bodies grind against one another. Her ache is gone as she feels his erection pressed between her legs and his hand on her breast.

Both are consumed by the lust they've never felt before that they don't notice the time pass by so quickly that her dad knocks on her door.


	7. Discipline

"I had trusted both of you. Let you into my home."

Mr. Baker was furious and his eyes were glued to his daughter's boyfriend. He hadn't liked Adam in the beginning but soon enough he started to like the boy.

Now that had all gone downhill when the father had walked in to the unholy act they were committing.

"Dad, we were just kissing." Becky tried to defend them to no avail.

There was no way they could beat this battle. When he walked in, they were in nothing but in undergarments. He came in too quickly that they had no chance to cover up.

The adult shook his head. "I would kick you out this instance but there's no where else for you to go." And he knew if he kicked Adam out, Becky would follow. "From now on, curfew for the both of you."

They both groaned. Becky, being a few months older than Adam, would be turning 19 next month and here she was being treated like a fifteen year old.

"Adam sleeps in the guest room since Uncle Dan left already. No funny business." He continued.

The teenager glanced at his girlfriend who didn't look too happy. He knew she would stand up and go against his words but he reached over to touch her knee, silently letting her know it's okay.

After the conversation, they went out for a walk and Adam listened quickly as his girlfriend went on and on about her dad.

"I can't believe him. He knows I've missed you and want to spend all my time with you, yet he gives us a curfew." She grunted and held Adam's hand in an even tighter grasp. "I'm okay with not being in the same room, but I like staying up with you. And kissing you at the wee hours of the night."

He contained his chuckle and just looked at her with a soft expression, "I get it, Becks. He just wants you to stick to your word, you know." Adam's feet stop walking and Becky faced him.

Looking into her eyes, he knew her expression would change but he thinks it's for the best. "Maybe we should just not do what we did this morning until later." Both her eyebrows went up and she let go of his hand, he quickly added, "I don't regret it, I don't. Trust me. Just, it's better if we wait until we have our own privacy. Our own rooms and when we're not at risk for someone to barge in."

Clearing her throat, she was feeling more and more heartbroken. She had let him in physically and was open to it, now he was backtracking. He was willing to put her needs aside in order to satisfy her parents. Sure, she appreciated it but what her parents thought shouldn't matter.

"Okay." She choked out.

Becky turned on her heel and led the way. Adam followed in silence and knew she was mad, but it was for the better.

::

"I love this weather." Adam sighs as he lies down on the towel.

They were at the beach. Even if it was the end of November, people still went to get their tan on. Becky brought him hear unexpectedly, so he sported his pants and t-shirt.

Becky hugged his side and rested her head on his shoulder, letting out a calming breath. "Not missing the snow up North?"

"Not so much. This is like the perfect temperature."

They had gone out to eat lunch; afterwards Becky gave him a tour of the city and now was at the closest beach.

Adam eyes were closed as his relaxed. Truly, it was perfect. These pasts few days contained up and down's but all in all, he loved spending them with Becky. He would be leaving in two days but didn't want to dwell.

Becky's fingers slipped under his shirt and gently caressed his skin. She was still bothered that they wouldn't pursue their physical intimacy any further, but it would help in keeping her promise to god in check. She was tempted but him being miles away would help control the temptation.

Maybe these next few years wouldn't be so bad. They had so much love for one another; there would be no way they couldn't make it through until junior year.

::

"I love you." He whispered to her after pulling away from her lips.

Her hands traveled from his neck down to his bare torso. It was the end of another day and they were saying their goodnights as Mr. Baker had enforced the new rules; curfew was at one am and no sleeping in the same room. He had given in when Becky started tearing up about wanting more time with Adam, so he switched his curfew from eleven to one, which was very generous.

"And I love you." She replied in the same voice with a wide smile. "Why don't I just stay a little bit longer?"

Her lips were on his again as they stood in front of the guest room door. Adam's knees grew weak when her finger hooked in front of his pajama pants. "Becks.. Goodnight."

Again, he pulled their lips away and Becky felt accomplished as she left him downstairs out of breath and with a smile.

* * *

_hope you're enjoying so far! read and review, thanks xx_


	8. Contact

"Hey, beautiful."

"Hiya, handsome."

They smiled at one another through the computer screens. Almost a month had gone by since he had left Florida and they were in a good place.

Adam remained busy with work and school, and Becky remained busy with school and extracurricular. Right now, Adam had just got in from a late shift and it was nearing midnight.

"How was your day?" Adam asked her, as they hadn't exactly spoken throughout the day except some few texts they exchanged.

Becky talked about her whole day and about a huge chance she was notified of today, "I received another scholarship to study aboard during spring break. There's all these different choices and I'm leaning towards going to Greece."

"Oh! Congrats, babe. You're definitely going, right?"

They had already planned for her to come up during spring break as he was too busy to go see her again during the winter, and her parents didn't want for her to come back to Toronto on her own.

Another three months without seeing her, and now with this trip he possibly couldn't see her until the end of the school year. As much as he hated the idea, he was happy for her. She always talked about wanting to travel, now was her chance.

"I want to.." Becky drifted off as she looked at Adam, he look exhausted. He was always working hard and he was saving up money for future surgery's for his transition. He had spent his money on his last trip and she wanted to see him again, even if it were to sacrifice this chance. "But I want to see you as well."

A smile slowly appeared on his face and he nodded, "I want to see you too, but you shouldn't give up your chance because of me."

She stayed quiet as she contemplated. She still had a month to decide what to do. They spoke for an hour longer as Adam told her about her day. They wanted to talk more but Adam was yawning by the end of the hour.

::

"This is just so hard, you know." Becky wiped at her tears as she poured out her sadness onto her friend, Will.

Will was a sophomore and had transferred all the way from Connecticut. He understood what she was going through as he had left his girlfriend back at home. Becky had met him in the gym and had instantly clicked when he had helped her out with a machine.

"Even if he doesn't admit it, he's struggling just as much as you, Becky." He advised her, handing her a tissue.

Becky just sniffled and rubbed her temples. It was after they ended their Skype call that Becky couldn't sleep so she had called Will over. She found herself always needing him when she needed Adam.

"Yeah, Becks, you probably aren't alone in the way you feel." Her roommate poked her head out from the top bunk bed. Her name was Leslie and they had very little in common but she was a good person at heart. "You know what? I'll take you out tomorrow to get your mind off this."

"Oh, are you talking about that underground party because I am so there." Will smirked and they pounded their fists, Becky merely giggling at the small interaction.

"Fine."

::

She felt dizzy but good at the same time.

When Leslie had told her about the party, she had no idea it would be this crazy. Adam had told her about an underground party he had attended, but this in no way was the same.

Everyone was so packed together and enjoying him or herself. Becky hadn't been enjoying herself at first but soon enough, Leslie convinced her to take a few shots. The first she had ever tried.

Now she felt buzzed and her worries were far from her. Her mind was clouded and the lights were just mixed up into one. She could feel someone pressed up behind her. It was Will.

At this form of sensation, she didn't care. Something else must have been in those drinks because she felt her skin jump at his contact. How she missed being touched. That's when her mind went to Adam and when she turned her head she was met with green eyes instead of the blue ones she could get lost in.

Excusing herself, she pushed away and called Adam.

::

"How are you feeling?" Leslie asked while coming down her bed.

She had a headache and looked at Becky concerned. When she had given her the shots, she didn't know some of the shots had ecstasy in them.

Both the shots given to Leslie and Becky had contained ecstasy and she felt bad knowing this was the first time the blonde had ever even drank.

"Like poop." Becky mumbled against her pillow. She had never felt so exhausted and thirsty in her life.

A sudden chirp was heard from her phone and she looked at the screen.

_"Good morning. Hope you feel fine, baby. Would call but headed into my shift. Love you." _

A text from Adam. She smiled and lazily typed back an I love you.

Glancing at the screen again, she had a text from Will.

"_Hope you feel better, Becks. Sorry about last night. Boundaries lol."_

This also made her smile. She didn't know what it was but she found herself forgiving him more easily than Robert. Robert had tried to kiss her and she avoided him the best she could after.

Now, Will had danced up against her and been physically close to her but she was fine with it.

In no way would she mention this to Adam.


	9. Summertime

"Finally, you're home!" Adam shouted in glee as Becky ran to him and jumped in his arms.

They hugged tightly and warmly, soon kissing each other in front of everyone in the airport; they didn't care.

It had been _months_ since they had last seen each other. Becky had visited him during his birthday just for the weekend in February, after that they hadn't seen each other in person.

Becky had taken the scholarship to visit Greece during spring break, afterwards they had tried to plan to meet once more but their schedules always conflicted.

Now it was mid-may and she had finished her exams. She would stay here for two months then Adam would go with her on her way back just for a week.

The first school year was a huge hurdle for them but they had made it through. Adam had his distractions that kept him busy, Becky had the same plus Will. She had mentioned Will to Adam a few times to assure nothing was happening between them as Becky and Will had grown closer.

She was her male support system back at campus since he understood. Unlike her, Will had ended his relationship with his long distance girlfriend to just enjoy his college time.

Becky had no thought of leaving Adam out cold just because of distance. It was difficult but she never felt like this for anyone else beside him.

Being in his arms now, she felt such at home with the comfort and his regular aroma. His built was the same but Becky had grown and was now just a mere inch shorter than him.

She had dressed in a red sundress that Adam would adore, and he did.

"My goodness, you look beautiful." He commented under his breath. She hadn't noticed his eyes were watery and she brought him in for another hug; letting him wrap his arms around her middle as he settled his face in her neck.

"I'm home."

::

"Welcome back!"

Becky jumped when she heard this being shouted at her when she walked into the Torres household.

She smiled when it hit her Adam had thrown a little welcome back party for her. She recognized all the faces; consisting of his parents, Drew, Dallas, Clare, and Eli.

"Aw, you guys." Tears were on the brink of her eyes as she greeted everyone with a warm hug. Audra hugged her tightly as she was out of town when Becky had visited, so she hadn't seen her for almost a year.

Adam walked away from the gathering as he went upstairs to set his girlfriend's bags to the side. He couldn't wipe the smile off his face if he tried; his love was back in town.

His heart beat faster when he thought about her staying in his room for the whole stay. After her dad had caught them doing the almost-deed, they hadn't been very physical. They had only seen each other once after that encounter but it all remained innocent that time.

He wanted to pursue more with her now that she was here but he didn't know if she would want it. There were several nights where he would touch himself just thinking about that time of intimacy. Now she was here and as much as he wanted her at this moment, they had a whole two months to do anything.

The door knob had clicked and he looked back to see Becky come in. "Adam, this is so sweet of you." She gave him now time as they clashed mouths with smiles on their lips. "Luckily for you, I have a surprise too."

He watched her as she dug into one of her bags, pulling out a long box that he knew held either a necklace or a chain of some sort.

Becky wrapped her arms around his middle and held him close as he opened up the box. In it was a chain bracelet that had a tag with _A+B _on the front.

"Let me guess, apples plus bananas?"

She laughed and squeezed him tighter as she explained; "I wrote that on a piece of paper when I first told my dad about you. He found me doodling it in the kitchen." Her cheeks faintly blushed, as she never revealed this to him before hand.

"You're so cute." Adam commented out loud as Becky put the bracelet around his wrist. "Thank you."

They shared an effortless kiss and soon started heading down the stairs.

::

"You are not allowed to wear heels, again." Adam joked as they got into his room.

The day had been great as they enjoyed the welcome back party and was followed by some alone time when he took her to dinner.

Becky smirked and sat down as she removed her heels, they had made her appear taller than him. "You told me once you liked me in heels."

"That was before you grew like ten inches." He chuckled and approached her, dragging his other chair to sit across from her. "Wear whatever makes you comfortable. Maybe next time we'll both wear heels."

She now laughed as the thought came into her head. She found herself staring at her face, her hand reaching over running a finger along his jaw where she saw some faint hair growing. "I'm not the only one going through puberty."

He grinned at her comment and found himself getting lost in her touch once more while she continued to caress his face.

Looking into his eyes were one of her favorite activities, she hadnever have seen a guy with such beautiful eyes. Especially when his eyes held so much emotion. She expressed herself through body language as when she was mad there would be no touching or when she was in her own thoughts she would sit stiff.

But he was different, his body language didn't explain much as he always seemed to stand tall and strong. She could only tell his feelings through the way he expressed his eyes; he would stare intensely when he was mad or his eyes would advert from her gaze when he would lie.

Right now, he was looking directly at her with so much affection it took her back to the early times in their relationship when he would stare at her as if in a daze.

"I've missed you." She said to him as she tugged just slightest on his tie.


	10. The Couch

_Things get a little more explicit in this chapter, fair warning._

* * *

_Actions speak louder than words_, Adam thought to himself. Instead of verbally answering, he leaned in for a heated kiss. Becky only took a second to reciprocate as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

He got lost into the kiss as he deepened it, soon nibbling on her bottom lip that made her moan. His neat short hair has been a mess as her fingers tangled into it. Just as he was about to pull away, she forced her tongue into his mouth; this made him moan.

Becky's hands soon were pushing back his suit coat and once that was done with she was unbuttoning his shirt as best as she could. She failed to do such task and she groaned in frustration, finally pulling away from his lips.

They both tried to catch their breaths and stood up. Adam was undoing his shirt before Becky took over the task. The room was silent as she did so.

"So much better in person." She grinned as her fingers gently scratched at his chest.

On several occasions while video chatting, he would show her his progress body wise. It also didn't hurt that he had a hastygram page dedicated to his transition; she couldn't have enough of her shirtless boyfriend.

Adam grinned and felt on top of the world as her fingers continued to graze his skin. He watched as she stepped back and grabbed her phone, "What are you doing?"

She sat down once more and crossed her legs. "Getting a few pictures of my own. Only for _my _eyes." He blushed at her words and stuffed his hands into his front pockets. After taking a few shots she spoke up again, "Take them off." She referred to his pants and his eyebrows shot right up.

This was new. She was basically making him strip right in front of her but he had no shame as he did as he was told. Becky smiled as she got a few more pictures and was satisfied.

Setting her phone down, she approached him with a smile. It was now his turn to undress her. He easily slipped off her dress and his hands were eager to touch her. Becky stopped his hands before they reached her breasts. "I can't touch your boobs but you can take pictures of me?"

She was taken aback just the slightest but soon got the hint he was joking when he smiled. "We should just talk about, you know, being physical. Last time you said to not repeat what we did last time but…" Her voice drifted as she glanced at his lips, "But I want you so bad right now."

Adam gulped at the sound of those words. She had never said that to him before and right now he was going to give her what he wanted. "I can pleasure you another way, without it technically being sex." He knew that was far from anything sexy he could say.

Her eyes looked at him in confusion and all he did was grin.

"Put on your robe."

::

They were on the couch in the basement. Her robe was on the ground and she laid there in nothing but panties. He remained in his pajama pants, as he would focus on solely her tonight.

It was past midnight as it took Drew and Dallas some convincing to give up the basement for the night since his parents were upstairs. Both Drew and Dallas congratulated him thinking his was going to get laid so eventually they agreed to leave for the night. Well, Drew decided to stay with a friend of his and Dallas followed.

Adam wanted to take her to the bedroom, but Becky felt wrong doing it in someone else's bed. Oddly she preferred the couch than Drew's bed. She had no idea what he had in mind for her but things were getting heated.

"Take em off." She pleaded against his lips as her hands pushed at his waistband but he wouldn't budge. "Please." Her blue eyes looked up at him in a way that he couldn't say no.

Her eyes went to his erection; he had grown since last time. "Wanna take another picture?" Adam wittily asked and she laughed with a nod.

"I got something better." He leaned back down and placed both hands on the couch on either side of her head. Looking directly into her eyes, he knew saying what he would say next is risky but he took the chance. "Touch me."

Becky looked a little confused as to what he was referring to but when his crotch pressed up against her thigh she knew what he wanted. "If you don't want to, doesn't matter. I'm still going to touch you."

She shivered at the claim; he didn't even have to ask. He knew she wanted him to touch her. Before she could respond, his hands were pushing down her panties. She felt vulnerable under him and when his eyes traveled down the length of her body, she felt shy.

But once their eyes made contact once more every thought escaped her mind, every fear had left her and she just wanted the guy beside her to touch her. He was on his side on the couch so when her legs spread, one of her legs went over his own.

Adam's fingers slowly traveled up her thigh and made contact with her core. "Oh my god." She shuddered when his finger slowly went between her folds. He smirked, as she seemed to have already lost control when she said the lord's name in vain.

He didn't look away from her eyes and neither did she. "Tell me what you like, okay?" He whispered to her. Being inexperienced on both their ends made this a little harder. He wanted to make her reach a climax but he wasn't sure what to do.

Becky looked up at him sort of in awe as she had fantasized about this before.

With her guidance, it didn't take long for her to start moaning. His thumb rubbed at her clit and a few fingers were inside her, slowly escalating in speed. "You feel so fucking good, Becks." He groaned against her neck as he continued to suck on her skin. Touching her was such a turn on and she was incredibly wet.

Curling his fingers made her back arch and she gasped, "Ad-am, oh my _god." _She moaned out his name again and her fingers dug into his shoulders, causing him to grunt. He picked up the pace of his fingers and made mouth contact with her nipples.

She struggled to form any words and just let loud moans pass through her lips. It was barely a minute later when she jerked beneath him when her orgasm ran through her body; she shuddered as this overwhelming pleasure coursed through her.

Adam's slowly moved his hand away and looked at her while her eyes remained closed as she caught her breathe, "How was that?" He whispered to her with a smile, his ego boosted knowing he satisfied her.

Her eyes slowly opened and smiled with ease. She leaned up to kiss him. "Amazing. I had no idea it would feel that good." She was being honest. Whenever she had touched herself, it wasn't as intense as this orgasm had been. His fingers felt amazing inside her.

She ran her finger down the side of his face and made a small humming noise. She opened her mouth to speak but there was a loud bang at the sliding door of the basement.

"What the hell?!" Adam shouted and moved to cover Becky up as Drew and Dallas both hollered out at Adam.

"Someone got laid. Someone got laid." Both the older boys laughed after shouting this and Becky turned completely red as Adam tried his best to cover her since he was still in his boxers.

"Cover your eyes, assholes." He mumbled the last part and waited till they had their backs turned with eyes covered in order to hand Becky her robe.

At least it wasn't his parents.


	11. Afterthought

Becky lied in bed waiting for Adam to return from his shower.

Last night was still fresh on her mind. She had so many things running through her head. Would they do this again or would it be a one-time thing like last time? Was he expecting for it to occur again tonight?

After Dallas and Drew got back home, Becky and Adam no longer had the privacy they wished they had. They had gone back up to his room and had fallen asleep, as doing anything with his parents near by was a no-go.

As much as she wanted to please him in the way he had done to her, she wasn't sure if he was comfortable with that. Sure he had told her to touch him but she wanted to be 100% he was comfortable standing fully nude in front of her as he was still transitioning and growing.

She moved to lie on her back with the sheets covering her body and sighed. She did feel guilty. Was this considered a sort of betrayal to god? She had vowed to wait until marriage and had even purchased promise rings for both Adam and her. Was she still a virgin?

When the door opened, she was relived as she knew Adam would console her and hear her questions if they were to sound pathetic. "Hey.." Her voice cracked and Adam looked at her with curiosity.

"Whatcha thinking about, babe?" He was drying his hair with the towel as he approached her. He had changed in the bathroom and was fully dressed ready for the day. Unlike Becky, whom still had to shower.

Slowly sitting up, she made sure the sheets covered her body; she had suddenly felt uncomfortable being the only one in the nude. "About last night." She started and felt overwhelmed as it hit her maybe she did regret what had happened.

Adam sat beside her in the bed and reached over to rub her bare back, gently running his fingers down her spine. "I had fun." He smirked. This was a rare moment of when he couldn't exactly read what was on her mind, "Until double D barged through the door."

She looked at him and sighed, "I feel like I broke all my promises to god, Adam. With what we did." Her words started to rush out of her mouth, "Like am I still a virgin? What is that even called what you did to me? What about you, I didn't even do anything to you and you had made me feel so _good. _I don't regret it but oh my god-goodness. See there I go, saying his name in vain."

He looked at her with just the slightest amusement and couldn't help but laugh softly. She just stared at him, how was this funny? "This isn't a joke, Adam. I thought you would understand." She tensed her back in order to get his hand off her.

Taking a deep breath, he made sure to get his thoughts in check. "I hate when you say that. I do understand." And he did. He understood where she was coming from and in full honesty he knew she would at least ask some questions about it.

"We were being intimate, last night. Technically you are still a virgin because I haven't been _inside._" Adam looked away, knowing they should make progress verbally talking about this sooner or later. "You didn't break your promises, love. Even if we did have sex, you wouldn't be cutting all ties with god off just by fulfilling your needs."

"Waiting for marriage is so difficult to do, and I'm surprised when people actually can do that because honestly just looking at you sometimes drives me over the edge." Becky finally smiled at him as he continued, "I love you and you love me, I hope you do at least, and that's what matters. Marriage is just love with a label on it."

Becky nipped her lip and glanced at his lips, "Of course I love you, silly."

"Good, because I really love you." He leaned over to tease her lips with his own, only brushing their lips together. This made her giggle and pressed their lips together for a sweet kiss they always shared in the morning.

::

Adam walked in through the front door after going to campus and taking his last exam. He was done for the year and he wanted to celebrate at a party he was invited to.

He was always excited for parties as he enjoyed them, but this would be the first college party he would attend with his girlfriend.

"Hi, baby." Adam found Becky in the kitchen preparing some tea and he embraced her from behind. "This isn't a dream? You're really here in my kitchen?" He asked as he set his head down on her shoulder.

She laughed and reached back to rub his head, "How was your exam?"

"Easy peasy." She turned around to face him and placed her hands on the base of his neck.

"That's why I'm with you, because you're smart…sweet… understanding…" She pecked his lips after every compliment. "And not bad to look at either."

He laughed and leaned in for a real kiss before he jumped at the noise of the teapot.

"So.. Want to be my date to this end of the year party?" Adam asked as he hoped onto the kitchen counter. His mother wasn't home so he was taking this to his advantage. "All my friends want to meet you. I keep telling them pictures don't do you enough justice."

Becky grinned from ear to ear while preparing the tea, "Going to show me off, aren't you?

"Yes, ma'am."


	12. Just a Little Tipsy

"Did the hubby just abandon you?"

Brian was one of Adam's closest friends that he made on campus. They had met in their English class and met up for lunch. Adam had always talked Brian's ear off by talking about Becky constantly, so when he introduced her he already knew her well.

Becky was amused that both Adam and her had a friend named Brian at their different campuses.

"I have no idea. He went to the bathroom and disappeared on me!" She spoke loud as she tired her best for him to hear her.

When Adam introduced her to his friends, she was happy and gleeful. They all seemed like great people and they all spoke to her as if they had known her for a long time. Brian had cleared it to her that Adam always spoke about his beautiful, sweet girlfriend.

Nodding, he then offered his hand to her to take her to the dance floor. She was hesitant as the last time a guy offered his hand to her; he had taken it as a cue to grind up against her.

His shined his pearly whites. "I'm gay, honey. Come on!"

She took his hand then with a grin. If she had never met Adam she would have been disgusted to even be around Brian, but now she happily danced on the floor.

Adam was tipsy and lost. He couldn't find the bathroom and when he thought a girl was helping him, she had just taken him to a bedroom! He quickly fled out of there and eventually found what he was looking for.

Once done, he went on the look out for the blonde. Adam spotted her dancing and he smiled at the sight.

Becky stiffed as she felt a body grind up against her from behind. She was on the verge of pulling away when the person's hands rested on her exposed stomach since she wore a crop top.

"It's me." Adam spoke against her ear with a small grin that turned into a smile as he felt her loosen up in his arms.

"Goodness, don't scare me like that." Becky looked back at him as she leaned her body against his.

"I couldn't resist. You're really sexy."

She grinned but it dropped at the faint smell of alcohol on his breathe. Is that why he took so long to come back to her? Again, she began to pull away but found herself being tugged towards him. "What's wrong?" He whispered against her ear.

Her eyes glanced at the crowd, as they all seemed to be in their own world. She grabbed his hand and led them to the backyard of the house. There were still people around but she picked a corner and stood near him.

Adam followed like a lost puppy and looked into the eyes of his girlfriend, wondering what was wrong and repeated his question.

"How much did you drink?"

Then it hit him what she was upset about but his eyes went blank. "Are you my parent now? I just drank to enjoy myself." He told her in a hushed voice, trying hard not to attract too much attention. "Not too mention you've drank before at school. I don't see what's wrong."

He was right and she sighed, grasping on to the cross on her neck. She felt slightly overwhelmed again as this past few days have been giving her relationship with a god a test. "I think I'm going to go back to your house." She adjusted his suspenders, trying to avoid his eyes.

"Stay. Enjoy yourself." Becky forced a small smile and leaned over to kiss the edge of his lips.

"No, stay." All he wanted to enjoy this party with her and he could tell something was on her mind this whole day. She needed to enjoy herself as well. "I can't enjoy myself completely unless you're here with me."

He hooked his fingers into the belt loops of her white jeans, pulling her closer by her waist. She looked at him in a bit of surprise, as he usually isn't very assertive. "You need to have fun, too, Becks. It's okay to have fun." Adam's hands now went up her sides and Becky was melting under his touch.

"Will I regret it if I stay?" Becky finally spoke up and found very little self control as his hands continued to roam.

"You'll regret it if you don't." He was being honest. He didn't want her throwing away any chance she got of enjoyment.

She sighed under her breath. "Okay."

::

"See, told you I remembered!" Adam smirked in success as he led his girlfriend to the bathroom.

He had no urge to pee but this was a room that had privacy, which he wanted with her at the moment.

The party was right in the middle of its high point and he hadn't drunk anything besides water. Becky was finally enjoying a party for the first time. The others at campus wouldn't be too much fun as she never had anyone to dance with or kiss or talk with in a corner; all which she has done tonight with the man she loves.

"Come in here." Adam tugged a confused Becky into the bathroom and shut the door, locking it.

"What are you doing?" She questioned him and soon got her answer when they connected lips. She only pulled away for a brief second, "A bathroom, how romantic."

He chuckled and mumbled against her lips, "I couldn't take it anymore. Those jeans look great on you."

Adam gently pressed Becky against the wall as they kept eye contact. His hands were in her back pockets and he had the biggest grin on his face, making Becky giggle. Their faces were so close together, their noses brushed against one another.

"You are my world, Becky Baker. I haven't felt this happy since my birthday." He spoke with sincerity and found himself get lost into her eyes until there was a bang on the door.

"Yo, this is the only bathroom. Hurry up!"

They both groaned, as their moment of love in a bathroom was lost.


	13. On Duty

"How are you and Becky doing?"

"We're good, not _too _bad."

Adam glanced over at one of his best friend's. Brian and him were skateboarding in the middle of the road, enjoying the summer time. Both him and Brian had off today, and since Becky had found a part time job for the summer she was busy.

"And what does that mean?" He raised a brow and looked at the blue-eyed boy. In all honesty, he had first befriended Adam as in hopes to get into his pants.

They both attended the LGBT club on campus and that made Brian assume he was either gay or bisexual. When Adam revealed he was trans, Brian was surprised as he has a built of a regular male. All hope was gone but they remained friends and had turned into best friends since both Eli and Clare had left Canada.

His shoulders shrugged and he skated towards the skate park they were headed to. "Just, we got physical in a way a few weeks back _but_ I don't know if she wants to do it again." Again he shrugged. "I don't want to give too much details. Sorry, pal." He grinned at Brian, as he knew that he had a crush on him at one point.

"Har har. I'm over that buddy." He got off his board and sat at the rim of the pipe with Adam. "Just go for it. You guys have something strong there and with that you can't just plan when to have sex; just go for it."

Biting his lip, he looked away. He was still very inexperienced but his hormones were still on the rage. Whenever they went to bed he had the desire to get intimate but he wasn't too sure. "I don't know, man. She's not like that."

Brian looked at Adam and squeezed his shoulder, "Trust me and go for it; at the heat of a moment. Maybe you're both changing or in bed. Wouldn't you like it if she just jumped you and starting ripping your clothes off?"

"I wouldn't mind that." He grinned at the thought.

::

Adam arrived at the animal shelter in search of his love.

He was sweaty and out of air as he had skateboarded all the way to see her. He walked inside and found Becky behind the counter looking through some papers.

"Baby! What are you doing here?" Becky looked up as soon as the bell chimed and she smiled. Moving away from the desk, she approached him and went in for a kiss before taking in his appearance. "Adam, did you bring water? It's like ninety degrees out!"

He smiled in return and shook his head, "I'm fine. It was a work out. Now I wont have to run later tonight."

"You're ridiculous but I appreciate the visit." She wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him without a struggle. "You just made my day. Someone was going to adopt a puppy but last minute they decided not too and he's going to be put down." Becky murmured against his ear.

Adam looked at her with a small smile once she pulled away and found himself twirling her wavy hair on his finger. "You still have time to get someone else to adopt him."

"Who? There's only an hour left!" She was extremely set on having this dog adopted as she found it unfair for a dog to be put down just because no one wanted to spare some time to take care of him.

"Have a little faith." At the time he said that someone walked in through the door; a father and his daughter. "See. Anything can happen." He whispered to her before moving away as she had to be professional at work.

He watched as Becky did her thing and snuck into the back where he could see all the animals to adopt. His eyes settled on one that had so much fur his mom would have to clean every hour to keep up. He saw Becky walk in with the family and he found himself staring at her in awe of how beautiful she is.

She stood tall and graceful in her plain white sundress that showed off her long legs, as it was rather short. Her hair was down and wavy as she had left it in braids the night before; she had yet to cut it. Only thing she was required to wear was a bandana with the logo on it; she sported it around her wrist. He had been caught staring as she looked up and their gazes met; she smiled at him and he blushed.

"Daddy, I want this one!" The little girl squealed in excitement as she ran towards where Adam was. She pointed at the fluff ball.

Adam stepped back and Becky grazed a finger down his arm before opening the cage for them. How was it possible that he was in such a trance as she was simply doing her job? He was head over heels for this girl.

He finally moved away so she could do her job in peace and found the dog she was speaking of earlier. He was a little on the older side and seemed to be some sort of German Shepard. Reading the tag, he saw what the problem was; couldn't be around kids.

"Psssst, baby." He called out for Becky once they were heading back to the office. "Can you open his cage?"

Becky walked towards him with pep in her step, as she was happy another dog was being adopted soon. "Thank you for visiting, again." She grazed her hand down his back, "You should go after though, you're too distracting."

"Me? You're the one who looks like an angel today. I can't stop looking at you." He leaned in to kiss her and they agreed he would leave after as she didn't want to risk losing this job she enjoyed.


	14. At The Dinner Table

"What a long day."

Becky lay on the couch after arriving from work. Drew was home and sat on the beanbag chair, unlike her he didn't work in the summer as he worked when he was at school.

"Adam will probably come home and massage your everything, don't worry." Drew smirked and got hit in the face with a pillow that Becky had thrown.

"Where is he anyways? I was expecting him to be here." Becky looked at her phone and sent him a quick text. Her eyes were closed when there was a bang on the door along with some howling.

"Oh, shit. He has a dog?" Drew quickly looked at the stairs in hopes his mom hadn't shown up at this exact moment. He went for the door and opened it, "Are you crazy, bro?"

The blonde finally sat up and smiled when she noticed it was the dog that she had mentioned to him. "Adam! Oh my god." At the sound of his name, he looked at Becky and smiled wide.

He knew he was crazy for bringing a dog to his house, nonetheless one his mom wouldn't want at all. But the smile on his girlfriend's face was worth it. He would find a place for this cute dog to stay at.

Once pass the surprise of the dog, they sat in a circle on the floor as they let the German Shepard sniff them all. His name was Rocky, which they laughed at since that was the name of Dallas kid.

Rocky had found a huge liking to Drew, and vice versa. "Bro, we can't give him up. Look at that face." He held the dogs face in his hands and Rocky licked his nose.

Adam lay between Becky's legs as he was exhausted from skateboarding everywhere then walking back home with Rocky. His head was on her chest and she combed his hair with her fingers. "You can have pets on campus, right? Why don't you take him with you when you leave?"

Becky chimed in, "That could work! As long as you take care of him properly."

"Of course, but first we have to deal with the wrath of our mom." Drew looked at Adam with slight fear. Three months with a dog in the house would be so much work.

"Or we can make sure mom doesn't come to the basement again for the rest of the summer." He joked and Becky laughed in his ear.

::

"Oh, my bad." Becky turned around as she walked into Adam changing.

He laughed. "Becks, you've seen me almost naked it's okay. Besides I'm just changing my shirt."

She turned around slowly and found that he wasn't lying. Now she admired him as he stood there in shorts and a t-shirt. There was a sort of ruggedness to him that she liked as he had scrapes on his legs from all his skateboard accidents and there was scruff on his face from some hair coming in. Then his attire was always loose in the past but his shirts fit him well around his lean muscular built.

The way he was looking at her earlier during work reminded her that he really did find her beautiful, and she could say the same about him. She always told him he was nice to look at, and it was true.

"Hey." She called out.

Adam looked at her as he was applying deodorant, "Hi." He smiled with slight amusement.

"You look like an angel, too."

::

The dinner table that night was full as all six seats were taken.

"Mom, please! I'll take him to school with me just let me keep him here for these next three months?" Drew was pleading his mom to agree to the dog. Omar was just laughing as he had agreed to the dog but convincing Audra was another thing.

"Yeah, mom. How can you say no to that face?" Adam grabbed Rocky's face and kissed his head.

Becky watched amused as the Torres boys were always seen as mama boys and now she could tell why. "Babe, go wash your hands before dinner."

Adam nodded in agreement; he had been touching Rocky all day.

Dallas spoke up as he opened up a soda bottle, "I just wish he had a different name. Makes me miss Rocky."

The blonde smiled at that as she always forgets he's also a father. Come to think of it Dallas was a father, Drew at one point thought he was going to be a father and Omar had kids! Only one who didn't have any sort of pregnancy scare was Adam, thankfully.

The boy took his spot next to Becky again and reached for her hand under the table, knowing she would silently say grace and he respected that; as did his parents who wouldn't eat until after she was done. Drew and Dallas were another story.

The conversation again went about Rocky and soon drifted to their living conditions. The house was packed as; Drew stayed in the basement in a room, Dallas slept in the basement as well but on the couch, Omar and Audra had a room, and the last room was Adam's that he shares with Becky.

"We all need to pull our weight around here. Cooking, cleaning, laundry, all of that must be split equally besides Becky who is our guest."

Drew groaned, "I'm a guest too! I'm only here for three months."

"Shut up, Andrew." Adam flung a peace of broccoli at his brother who caught it in his mouth.

"That is true but Adam works-"

"Ha, ha." Adam started but soon was told to be quiet as he interrupted his mother.

"He works so you have to pull extra weight. Dallas works too, and Becky has a part time job."

"I wouldn't mind helping, especially if there's a dog in the house. I can cook, clean." Becky started off after sipping some water.

Adam smiled as Audra went off on how Drew needs a girlfriend who can help his mother like Becky helped her. "Becky is one of a kind, so hands off."

His girlfriend grinned and glanced at Drew who looked a little annoyed, as everything seemed to be pinning on him. "Dad, you said we have to do everything equally. This isn't equal!"

"Suck it up." Dallas smirked as he was getting the good end of the deal.

Drew brightened up and had a devious grin on his face, "Since we're all being open about responsibility. Why don't we discuss the responsibility and maturity of sex?"

Drew looked directly at Adam with a smirk and Audra looked at Omar before looking at Adam. "What?"

Becky was wide-eyed and stopped mid chew. How could he bring that up when Adam and her hadn't even discussed it themselves?

"Adam! Is this true?"

"I am going to kill you, Andrew." Adam avoided his parent's gaze and he could sense Becky was uncomfortable as well.

"Adam!?" Audra repeated herself and he slowly looked at her.

This was dreadful.


	15. The Talk

"What the fuck, Andrew?" Adam was furious at his brother.

Becky and him had been awry as she has been struggling with keeping to her faith and then he springs this onto his mom at the dinner table? Of all places!

"You need to apologize to Becky!" Adam shouted at his brother in the basement. Adam had followed him downstairs after dinner as Becky had fled up the stairs after Drew had brought up the topic.

Drew squinted his eyes. "Why? I was saying the truth! And all of you were ganging up on me, that's unfair."

"Because we haven't had sex and she's already freaking out as it is about the thought of it." He sighed and shook his head, "You know what? Do whatever, apologize or don't."

Adam left Drew hanging as he went up the stairs to confront Becky.

Once he got upstairs, he barged into his room as he was already starting to state an apology but he stopped at the sight of his parents sitting there with Becky. Becky looked at Adam with a look that pleaded help; she was glad he was here now so they would stop asking questions.

"We need to talk about this, Adam." Omar spoke up and watched as his son took his place next to Becky, leaving some space between them.

"This isn't your business. I'm nineteen for god sakes, I don't need to pass this by you guys." Adam stated in frustration as he looked at his dad, scared at what his mother's expression would be.

Becky sat a little shell shocked at how he was speaking to them. All throughout the relationship she had always seen her boyfriend treat his parents with respect. She couldn't blame him now as she had the same reaction with her dad when he caught them in bed. "We aren't having sex." Becky spoke out and looked up at both his parents as they now stood in front of them.

Audra was confused at Drew's outburst at the kitchen and told them to explain what had occurred to make Drew think such a thing. After Adam explained as best as he could without getting too explicit, Audra rubbed her temples.

"Well, we've had this discussion with both you and your brother; about protection and diseases!"

"Mom." He just looked up at her in slight confusion, as it wasn't possible for him to get anyone pregnant.

The blonde sat there and looked between the Torres family. She was out of the loop, as her parents had never had "the talk" with her as she had promised to stay abstinent. All she knew was what they had taught her at school.

Both Omar and Audra exchanged looks as they looked towards Becky. They had interacted with her parents on a few occasions but weren't the friendliest as they knew how they had treated their son at first. Knowing how they were committed to their faith, they had to ask. "As long as you're _both_ aware of the consequences."

"You should both be emotionally ready to take that huge step. It could make or break a relationship." Adam held his head in his hands at the embarrassment he was feeling. He also wanted to push things further with Becky, but with this talk she knew she would be scared to do anything.

After a long talk, his parents finally left the room and he could feel a slight awkwardness in the room. They looked towards one another and he reached out to graze her hand, "You okay?"

She tucked some hair behind her ear and nodded, "Being lectured by your boyfriend's parents wasn't as bad as I would of imagined." She joked and he gave her a small smile.

He took this as his opportunity to say what he needed to say. He moved to kneel in front of her and wrapped his arms around her middle. She felt a comfort when he did this.

"I'm freaking out of moving forward physically." Adam started and Becky nodded in agreement. He took this as a cue to continue, "It's not so much that I don't want to be intimate in that way with you, it's just a huge step like my mom said. We're emotionally compatible, like you can read my feelings like a book and I find it so easy to tell you anything, but physically can be different."

"What do you mean?" She caressed his cheek and felt a small fear rise within her. The thought of them breaking up was something she never wanted to deal with.

"I mean we have to be comfortable with each other in that sense. If I don't want you seeing me naked, then how in the heck would that work? We should take it slowly; a step at a time. We already undress each other, maybe we can start changing together or changing while the other is in the room. Or maybe sleep half nude or naked completely. Shower together?"

"So, intimate things without the sex?"

Adam nodded and gave her a hopeful smile; "I want to do all that with you if you want to."

After the talk Audra gave them, she was a little afraid of moving forward. But she knew she wasn't alone in the fear. They could embrace it together a step at a time and she was willing to.

"I want to."

::

"Mmm, I love your lips."

Adam grinned as they continued to share small kisses in bed. It was early morning and they were relaxing before having to separate later in the day. Adam had to go in for work and Becky would be hanging out with Clare.

"I love your everything." Adam mumbled as their lips barely pulled apart.

They both were naked under the covers and she was on top. Their chests pressed up against one another and their legs were an entangled mess. Both of them enjoyed waking up in the morning because of the sole reason they would wake up right next to one another and share each other with one another.

A month had gone by since they had decided to pursue the physical aspect of their relationship more and there was no regret in doing so. Becky had finally seen Adam's full bod and she was happy with the results. As the time passed they got more and more comfortable changing in front of each other and found themselves getting naked at any chance they got.

They had even showered a few times when his parents weren't home and she adored those showers, as there was nothing but them to focus on.

Becky ran her fingertip along his bottom lip and she grinned up at him. She adored these moments to no end and had no idea how she would survive the school year without him.

::

The blonde walked into Adam's workplace, which was a radio studio that he just assisted the radio host. She smiled as she saw him looking through some old vinyls in the back.

She knew he wasn't the biggest fan of organization and when his shift required him to stay late to clean up, he would always be miserable. The music was blasting, as he was alone, cleaning up of course.

Her day with Clare was rather satisfying. The had a spa day as she was in need of girly activities since there was so much testosterone in the house she was staying at; the only other female in the house was Audra!

She had told Clare some details of her relationship and Clare was happy they were in a good place, and that Adam was happy. She knew Clare would defend that boy till the end of time, as she never wanted him to get hurt in anyway.

Now, it was time to be with her boyfriend once more.

"Hey you." Becky embraced him from behind and he jumped just a bit at the contact, as he didn't hear anyone coming in.

"Hey! What are you doing here?" Adam smiled and turned around to give her a proper hug. "Not that I don't mind you visiting, but it's late."

She smiled at him and shrugged. She wrapped her arms around her neck as she spoke, "Just thought I could help you out so you can get home sooner. A bath with you would be lovely." Her fingers entangled into his hair and she smiled when his face brightened.

"Now that's a good way to motivate me." They both laughed and he pulled her in for a small kiss before going back to finish his work as quickly as he could.


	16. Goodbye, Again

Adam set the box down and soon plopped onto the bed, he was tired.

Becky was moving stuff into her dorm room, which was a new one from last year. She would still have the same roommate; the room was just a bit bigger as she had moved up a year. Now she no longer had a bunk bed instead she had her own personal bed.

He looked up when he heard two girls squealing and it was Becky with whom he assumed was her roommate.

"I wasn't expecting you here until tomorrow."

"I know but my dad decided to come down a few days early just to get everything unpacked." Leslie explained and stopped in her tracks into the room when she spotted a tall cute boy standing in her room. She soon recognized him as Becky's boyfriend from pictures the blonde had shown her. "Ooh you must be the Canadian boyfriend."

Adam smiled and nodded, "I'm Adam. Leslie, right?" They shook hands and Leslie looked back to Becky with a face of approval.

"Now I know why you wanted me to come a day later." Leslie winked at Becky before settling in her own bed.

Becky rolled her eyes and took Adam's hand, "Come on, I'll go introduce you to my other friends that are waiting to meet you."

They said goodbye to Leslie as her dad had walked into the room. They had yet to unpack but Becky could do that later.

"There are so many kids here, damn." Becky gave him a look and he quickly apologized with a smile.

Adam felt a sort of sadness in the pit of his stomach as he watched all the college students. Attending a community college was so much different than this and he wished he could of experienced this at the same time Becky was. He grew more excited for the next school year as he took in the atmosphere.

Becky led him into the community building where it seemed like a lounge for the students and he saw a pack of students huddled on these couches. He recognized a majority of their faces from Becky having them in her room sometimes while they video chatted.

She quickly went towards them and introduced them all to her boyfriend. As soon as they were settled they were asking questions about when he would transfer and what he was majoring in. They were all really kind and instantly got along with them.

After a while, they were playing the games they provided at the lounge. He was stuck playing pool with Will.

"I just wanna say thank you, man. For being by her side and all." Adam speaks up as he waits for Will to hit the cue ball on the pool table.

Will's green eyes glanced up at him for a brief second and held some surprise; he didn't know Becky had mentioned him to Adam. Honestly, he was very close to her but was sort of in hopes that she would dump the Canadian to pursue something with him. He was attracted to her and found her fun to be around but he respected the boundaries she had at the moment since she wasn't single.

"It's not a problem. She's my best friend and I could relate to what you guys went through and are still going through." He hits the cue ball but the ball misses what he was aiming for. "Dang it."

Adam grins, "Picking up on her language, I see." He set up his aim and perfectly hit his goal. Adam was a pro at this game, "Should pay more attention in physics, buddy."

::

She felt so sad as the day had come to say goodbye for who knows how long.

"Please, don't go. Stay with me." Becky whispered to him as she had her forehead pressed against his. "I can't do this again, Adam."

They were at the airport and stood outside and they knew it would be harder for her to see him go. He felt bad that they had to go through this and that she was in pain of seeing him go. He wanted to stay and never go back unless she was by his side. "We'll see each other soon, okay?"

Adam pulled her in for a tight hug and felt her cry into his shoulder. This was hard for the both of them but they would get through it like the past year. It should be easier, right?

He had tears in his eyes too but was too distracted as he wiped her tears away. "We'll get through this together, even if we're apart." They shared an emotional kiss and hugged once more.

She struggled getting back into the car, as he wouldn't go inside the airport until she was gone. She rolled the window down in order for them to share another kiss. "I love you." They said to one another at the same time.

This was tough.

* * *

_hope you're still reading and enjoying the story! please review and tell me how the story is going, if its written well, could be better, is it great? reviews appreciated. thanks x_


	17. Thanksgiving Dinner II

Becky was mad.

She was mad, sad, upset, and disappointed. Adam was supposed to come down for thanksgiving like the past year but he was too busy to do so with his job and school was tougher this year.

How could he not just ask for the week off to see her? She was being selfish but she couldn't help it, as it's been three months since they're last goodbye at the airport. They had just had a conversation over the phone and he broke her the bad news that he wouldn't be buying a ticket.

Becky had hung up on him when she had tried convincing him to make time but he said it wasn't possible.

The past two months had been harder than last year since she had been so use to his company from the summer. She desired for his touch and his contact but it wasn't possible. Her hopes were high of him coming, but now it wasn't going to happen.

She knew hanging up wouldn't help in any way but she couldn't take it. The distance was getting to her and she was scared that at one point she would break.

All the way in Canada, Adam lied in bed as he was trying to think of some sort of way to go to Florida but there just wasn't time. He was more involved in work as his boss has confided more in him, school was more hectic as the material got a bit harder so he had study more, and he had found himself volunteering at the adoption shelter Becky had worked at during the summer.

Becky warned him that doing all that sort of work could prevent him from visiting but he wouldn't give up the opportunities he had, just like she hadn't given up the opportunity to go to Greece during Spring Break.

When she hung up on him, he felt his world had collapsed, as she had never done that to him before. He was being to worry about their relationship, as the past month wasn't the greatest; less phone calls, video calls, and even texts.

Adam wasn't satisfying what she needed and he was scared. He was scared he would lose her in any instant, as he knew how abrupt and impulsive she could be at times. He could help control that when they were around each other but with a simple phone call she could end it and he couldn't control that.

He had no control over anything and he felt helpless.

::

Becky sat at the thanksgiving dinner table and felt emptiness inside of her as she glanced around. Last year, Adam was at her side eating dinner with her and now she just listened in on the others conversations.

Veronica was at the table and she had apologized to Becky for her approaches towards Adam last time; Becky forgave her. She had asked the blonde why he wasn't here and Becky just shrugged.

She was tired of explaining. Her parents would ask so would her friends and the same conversation was beginning to bore her. Are you taken, are you single, where is he, why hasn't he came to visit, what's more important than coming to see you, why cant you go see him, and etc.

It was exhausting and she was exhausted.

Will had given his opinion and had agreed it was hard but she shouldn't be too impulsive and give up on something that is—was good.

But she couldn't take it anymore.

"Hey you. Caught me at a good time, just finished volunteering." Adam said on the phone as he answered Becky's call.

Becky stood outside her house and barely smiled, "I just have something to tell you."

"Shoot." He sounded happy and tired at the same time. It had been a long day and hearing Becky's voice brought pep to his own.

The next words he heard completely brought that happiness down and he found himself pleading for her to not do this but she had her mind set. "I can't take it anymore. I can't, Adam. This isn't enough."

"Becky, I'm sorry I couldn't be there—"

"Stop with the apologies. I'm not changing my mind. I'm sorry."

Then the line had dropped and he found himself talking to no one.

She had given up so easily and he had been trying.

"Mom?" He shouted out and he found her in the kitchen. She started to speak but realization hit her that something was wrong as tears ran down his face. "She broke up with me."

::

"Come on, honey. You need to eat." Leslie shook Becky's body.

The blonde wasn't doing well with the break up as well and had ignored any sort of contact Adam was trying. She knew it was for the best as she was miserable but this just felt worse. It had been a week but nothing seemed to cheer her up.

"Or we can go out? See that movie you were mentioning." Her roommate tried her best to get her up or out of this robotic depressed state.

Every since Becky had told her she had broken up with Adam, she was very concerned as it seemed very sudden. When she watched them interact that week they were moving in, they seemed so happy and head over heels for one another as if they were still in their honeymoon stage.

She could relate with the girl who was moping in bed almost every day as she had dumped her high school sweetheart before coming to college. Distance was rather difficult and only so many couples could actually pull it off.

"Okay." Becky sighed and got up.

Moping around wouldn't help her get out of this state. Maybe she would run into someone at the movies to keep her mind off it.

::

Adam was chugging down shots after shots.

He was at Brian's house and let all his sorrows out through alcohol. Brian had recommended to go to a party to hook up with anyone they found but Adam wasn't in the mood. He didn't want anyone but Becky.

"It's okay, bud, it's okay." Brian rubbed his back as he comforted his drunken friend. He had never seen him this intoxicated before as he always maintained control, but he didn't seem to care now.

Adam chugged down another shot and then leaned back on the couch, "I just mis-sher, ya know? I just want to see her and I know she wants to see me."

He nodded in understanding and even if he was drunk, Brian knew he was right. Becky had broken up with him not because she didn't love him or because he had done something wrong, she just wanted him there but he couldn't be.

"Hey I have an idea, man." Brian grinned and reached for his laptop. "You can go surprise her. Next weekend, go surprise her and charm her up. Get her back."

Adam squinted but at his drunken state all responsibilities he had were thrown out the window, "Let's do it!"


	18. Surprise?

Adam was in Florida again, on campus to be exact.

He had no idea what he had done with Brian till the next day and he was pissed that Brian had let him do that especially when he had to work on the weekends. But he managed to pull it off and request the days off.

A friend of his from Degrassi had transferred to this campus as well and he had contacted him so he had a place to stay just in case things didn't exactly go as planned with Becky.

After leaving all his stuff there, he went to go buy flowers before looking for his ex-girlfriend of two weeks. He knew that once they talked it out they would be better. He knew they couldn't just end things like that especially when they loved each other to no end.

::

Becky smiled at Will as they reached her room.

He had been very kind to her lately and has kept her spirit up the whole day as they went to classes together. It was now nighttime and many people were getting ready to enjoy their Friday night. Becky had no plans yet so she let Will join her in her room.

"We should talk about, you know what.." Will started as Becky settled into her bed. He sat next to her and looked at her. He had kissed her the day before in the moment. Will had thought it was the perfect chance to kiss her but she had only kissed back for a brief second before pulling away.

"Will, I just.. I just broke up with him two weeks ago." Becky started and she couldn't help but frown as she noticed the disappointment on her face.

She reached over to graze his face and wondered if maybe Will was what she needed at this moment. Maybe he was always by her side for a reason? Maybe that's why she broke up with Adam. She was just trying to justify a good reason before leaning over and gently kissing his lips.

Once reaching her room, he saw the door was open and he prepared himself before he stepped in.

The sight he saw brought rage to him as he saw Becky kissing the guy who he had trusted when they met in the summer; Will.

The kiss wasn't intense, it looked almost innocent, but his trust was broken. Will pulled away when he saw a figure standing there, "Oh, shit."

Becky eyes went wide-eyed as she saw Adam standing there looking the most angry she had ever seen him. "Adam?" Was she dreaming? There would be no way he would drop everything to come see her.

It hit her then that he had seen her kiss someone else, and she scrambled out of bed. She spotted the flowers, "What are you doing here?"

Adam just stared at her and shook his head, "No idea."

He quickly fleeted and handed the flowers to a brunette that was walking past him, she smiled and Becky was shocked as she followed him.

"Adam!" She called out and reached for his hand, he quickly pulled it away as if he had been burned. "Adam.." She tried to touch him once more but he snapped.

"Don't even touch me." Adam spoke with so much venom as he turned around to face her. They were at the end of the hall and he was about to exit but he would prefer having any sort of conversation inside than outside.

The blonde was taken aback as he had never pushed her away in any sense or had spoken to her like that. She tried looking into his eyes but he wouldn't look at her and she knew that she had screwed up.

His baby blue eyes looked behind her and she glanced back to see Will standing there. "Look, Adam, that wasn't—"

"That wasn't what exactly? Guess you move really fast or maybe had moved on when we were together." He shrugged his shoulders and sounded so empty.

Becky looked astonished, "No! Cheating is a sin, I would never do that."

"Then I guess you do move fast. That's why you dumped me, right? Because he's here and I can't be." Adam looked into her eyes and she didn't respond; he was right.

She had tried to get over the break up and Will was the only way how as he was there all the time. The attention she wanted from Adam the past months was one Will wanted to give her and had been giving her.

"Two and a half years and you end it because you would rather kiss Irish boy over there." He scoffed and knew he had to stop as he noticed the hurt expression on her face. She wasn't talking and he didn't care anymore.

He held his hands up and flicked Will off, "Fuck you!"

Becky chewed the inside of her cheek, as she seemed to have lost her voice.

As she took in the sight of him, she realized even more how she missed him. She just wanted to touch him or to reach out and fix the collar of his shirt, as he seemed to have dressed nice to see her.

She reached up for the collar but Adam grabbed her hands in his and pushed them away so quickly as if any sort of touch from her would physically hurt him.

"This was a waste of my time," was the last thing Adam said to her before he walked out the door. Everything seemed like a waste; the relationship, the trip, the investment in her. She had thrown it away for another guy.

The blonde walked back towards her room, "I'll see you later." She mumbled to Will and slammed the door as he tried to go back into the room.

She should have followed him out the doors but she knew no good would come of it, as he was the angriest she had ever seen him. She wouldn't even let her touch him and just that thought brought her to tears.

The boy who loved her since high school now seemed to hate her.


	19. Another Girl

"Lets do it!"

Rico shouted out with Adam by his side as they found the house a huge party was being held. The house seemed packed as music was blasting so loud and there were already a lot of red cups on the lawn.

"Now this is a true college party. You better fucking enjoy it." Rico shook Adam by the shoulders and he laughed. They both had taken pre game shots and now Adam was in a lighter mood than before.

Becky had hurt him deeply and Rico knew this party would keep his mind off it. Rico did warn him there would be a chance Becky could be here as they did have mutual friends.

Adam tried to push that thought away as he would do anything to forget about her for the night. He came dressed the way Becky had seen him; a dark polo, slim fit jeans, suspenders, and sneakers.

As soon as he walked inside, he grinned; he would enjoy this night.

::

Becky sighed as she walked along her friend, Christina.

Much like Rico had done to Adam, Christina convinced Becky to attend this party to get her mind off things. Will also tagged along and Becky was a bit stiff as Adam was still on her mind.

She felt awful because she knew she had hurt the boy she loved deeply. The thought of Adam even touching another girl made her blood rush with anger, so she understood why Adam was as angry as he was.

"We'll have fun." Will told Becky and tried to reach for her hand, but she pulled away.

Christina just watched as she made a face of disgust. She knew that Will had feelings for Becky but she felt like Will had played Becky like a guitar. Will had a huge influence on Becky's decisions, so she felt as if Will had convinced Becky to dump Adam so he could have a chance.

Watching them now, she felt like this could be true but Will was a good guy who was more into Becky than Becky was into him.

They eventually found the party and walked into the mess of wild college students.

::

Adam was playing beer pong and was losing badly.

He was already feeling a little drunk as the guy he was up against had only one more cup to hit before he wins. Adam tired his best but he was too tipsy to achieve any sort of win, so he gave up- drinking the last cup.

"Good game, man." They shook hands and Adam went to the kitchen in search of some snacks.

That's when he saw the familiar figure of his ex-girlfriend. She wore a well fitting dress that brought much attention to her long legs and he felt himself melt at the sight. He was too drunk to contain his urges.

As drunk as he was, he wouldn't speak to her.

"Adam?" Becky spoke up when she saw him open the cooler. Of course he didn't respond and kept walking as if she didn't exist. How did he even find this party?

She slowly followed as he went to a table that had people taking shots and Adam soon took his place as he took only a few, knowing he was going to be past drunk within the next ten minutes.

He looked up and met gazes with Becky who was watching. She had never seen him so intoxicated before as she never let him reach to that extreme, but he was out of it. His eyes were glazed and he seemed to smile at her, but it soon fell as Will approached the tall blonde.

"Wanna dance?" Will asked her and stood right in front of her line of sight. He grinned at her, admiring the way she looked; she looked extremely hot. "You have to enjoy yourself." He leaned down to whisper in her ear and the heat of his breathe tickled her neck; making her smile.

Adam continued to watch and wasn't even angry. Any sort of feeling was being pushed away and he just felt happy. Out of the corner of his eye he saw the brunette that he had handed the flowers to.

Her eyes were hazel and they were focused right on Adam. She gave him an inviting smile and he got up as fast as he could to approach her.

"Adam." He stretched out his hand and she shook it, surprised by his manners.

"Ashley." She gave him a bright smile, "Thank you for the flowers. They made my day."

He laughed and she smiled. He was really handsome and had never seen him on campus before. He was tall but she could tell he was younger than her. She was a senior and studying to become a doctor.

"It's not a problem. One act of kindness is good for the heart." He patted his chest on the opposite side of where his heart was.

"Over here, you mean." Yeah, he was drunk but she didn't mind. Most of the guys she had the best sex with were drunk at the same. Her hand reached up to pat his chest and she let it roam down his torso. She could feel that he had a strong built even if he looked rather thin.

Becky watched out of the corner of her eye as she saw Adam flirt with another girl. Now she knew the pain Adam felt when he saw her kissing Will.

She let Will lead her to the dance floor as she wanted to enjoy herself too but felt her focus to be on Adam.

Ashley stood closer to Adam as she found herself more and more attracted to the blue-eyed boy. The way he spoke, even if drunk, was so confident and he had this edge to him that made her want to devour him right there.

"What are you thinking?" Adam asked with a grin. He was attracted to the girl and found himself wanting her, probably the effect of the alcohol.

She didn't answer as she merely grabbed his hand and began to drag him through the dance floor to the stairs.

Becky felt as if on the brink of tears when she saw this. There would be no reason to go upstairs unless they were to have sex, and that was what they were going to do. She had imagined so many times they would give themselves up to one another but it didn't look like that anymore.

Excusing herself, Becky went to the bathroom and wiped at her tears. She had screwed up so bad. Adam had come to see her and she had tried pushing herself onto Will when all she desired was Adam.

Now he was drunk, with another girl, in the privacy of another room.

* * *

_decided to post the next chapter early as many reviewed asking for it! tell me what you think. xx_


	20. Drunk Hookup

It was merely ten minutes later when Becky heard shouting come from outside the bathroom.

"Cops are coming! Cops are coming!"

"Oh, crap." She mumbled to herself and she felt as if in a state of panic. She hadn't drunk anything but if she were caught, it wouldn't look good on her record.

"Oh, shit." Adam said out loud. He wasn't underage, well technically he wasn't in Canada, but he remembered Becky telling him the age to drink was 21 and he was insanely drunk. "Oh, shit."

Adam was already down the stairs as he wanted to get far away from the scene as possible but he went to search for Becky first.

"Every man for himself!" He heard someone shout out but Adam was too busy looking for the blonde. He knew she would be terrified of getting caught even if she was sober.

Adam saw Will but he was running out the front door. _What an ass. _He thought to himself. "Becky?! Becky?!" He tried shouting and soon saw the blonde by the bathroom.

Becky looked around at the sound of her name and saw Adam was the one shouting her name. He looked sort of dazed and flustered as his hair was all over the place and once he got closer she noticed his shirt was off; this instantly made her upset.

"We have to go." Adam didn't give her a chance to process as he grabbed her hand and led them out through the back. He tried his best to stay balanced as Becky followed. She had been waiting for Will to come to her but instead it was Adam, to her surprise.

"Fuck." He mumbled once they were in the clear. They stood on a vacant road and he had his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath as he felt he was about to throw up. "Are you okay?"

Becky squinted as he stood up and she started to yell, "Why do you care? I bet Ashley made you forget _all _about me." She huffed out and was going to walk away but she couldn't leave him like that in the middle of the night.

Adam looked confused at first then grinned, "No, she didn't."

"Then she must have been really bad in bed." Becky continued and sounded sad. He had given his body up to a stranger.

"Stop that. I didn't do anything!" Adam sighed and rubbed his temples, "She was hot, sure, but damn it Becky I just want to fuck you."

He stood there wide eyed, knowing that shouldn't have been the way to word it and started to correct himself but Becky's laughing stopped him.

"Wow, that is so romantic." She crossed her arms once her laughter died down, still in her defense mood. Becky continued to eye him to see if he would explain himself but he stood there with slight confusion on his face. "So why is your shirt off?"

Adam stared at her and shrugged, placing his hands on his hips, "Not enjoying the view?" He tried to approach her but she kept her distance, as she clearly wasn't impressed by his answer, "Fine. We made out a lot, she got naked, I almost got naked then we stopped when I heard the shouting."

Her heart stung at his words, knowing that he probably would of continued his actions if the cops hadn't arrived. Becky turned her head away and looked out at the street that was rather empty.

"Sucks, doesn't it?" She heard him speak up and she gave him a look that could kill. Was he really trying to get back at her for just a simple kiss by sleeping with someone else in a drunken state?

"You know what, Adam? This isn't acceptable and I don't want to be around you at all if you're going to act like this." She actually begun to walk away and she could hear his footsteps following her.

"You can't walk home alone." He reached for her and she sighed, letting him follow her home.

::

"Adam, please go." Becky was frustrated and wanted to be alone.

"I can't. I don't remember how to get there." Adam honestly told her and took a seat on her chair.

They were alone, as Leslie didn't seem to be in the room. His eyes looked around the room before settling again on Becky. He smiled at her even if she looked irritated, "You look beautiful."

Becky stood against her closet door as she removed her heels. The dress she was wearing wasn't too revealing but of course it showed off the long legs she had. She glanced back to look at him with slight irritation as she wanted to get undressed but he wouldn't look away.

"I need to change." She stated.

Adam sipped his water and kept staring for a minute longer, finally taking her in after not seeing her for _months._ "Okay." He whispered before getting up to leave the small room.

She tried her best to keep up the tough act but couldn't at how he spoke so softly—as if he had no intention to hurt her any further. She would let him stay the night.

A sense of paranoia ran through her once she realized he had actually stepped outside. Adam was unpredictable when he was intoxicated so she changed quickly in order to make sure her estranged boyfriend wouldn't leave the dorms.

"Come in." Becky sounded almost relieved to find him squatting against the wall, across the narrow hallway. He smiles at her before walking inside and she follows by locking the door. Adam looked very much like he had just attended a party and she knew it was her responsibility to piece him back together.

Silently, she approached him and would avoid his gaze as she removed his shirt. "I have a shirt you can borrow."

"That's not necessary." Adam finally spoke; he wasn't much of a talker after consuming alcohol.

After helping him clean up a bit, she settled into her bed. He was lying on the ground between both the beds but he couldn't sleep as much was on his mind.

The alcohol had worn down slowly, but he could think more clearly. The whole Ashley thing was a mistake and he couldn't let Becky sleep without letting her know.

"Hey, I'm sorry." Adam spoke up and glanced over at Becky's bed to see if she were to respond in any way. "I was angry, and I still am in a way, but I just want you to know that I only want to be with you."

Becky shifted her body just a bit so she could look down at Adam. They were in the dark but the faint light from outside the dorms, peaking through the windows, made it possible to make out his outline. As if he had taken this as a cue to approach her, he was joining her in bed.

"Adam, we shouldn't be doing this.." She started to push him away. They were still broken up and angry at one another; they had so much to talk about, but Adam wasn't having it.

He pressed his lips against hers and they both instantly melted into one another. After so long without each other's physical contact, they had forgotten how it felt. But now as they reconnected, they needed more.


	21. Too Much Distance

"She didn't answer my texts, so I'm just worried if she got caught."

Will explained himself as he followed Leslie, Becky's roommate. Leslie was headed to her room, as she hadn't been there the whole night; she had a boyfriend at the school and occasionally stayed with him.

"Then why didn't you help her yesterday? You know, stick around and help her leave the house?" Leslie squinted her eyes with a grin. It was _so _obvious he liked Becky and Becky had told her of the kiss they shared.

She didn't like it a bit as she knew Becky wasn't ready to move on. She was a friend with both Becky and Will, so she didn't want either of them to get hurt.

"I just forgot…" He started to explain as Leslie unlocked the door.

"Becky!" Leslie hollered out as the blonde was usually up at this hour.

Both Will and Leslie looked in slight shock at Becky who was sitting up, clearly just waking up now at the sound of her name. She had the covers pulled up to her chest and it was obvious she was naked.

Becky took a while to process and rubbed her eyes, "Oh my god, I'm so sorry." She spoke slowly and had only noticed now that Will was in the room as well. She tugged the sheets up even further and avoided the male's gaze.

"Aw, snap! Gurl, who's in there with you?" Leslie smirked.

Adam groaned and sat up as well. The talking woke him up and made his head hurt even worse. He didn't recall much of the night's activities at the party, but he did remember everything after. "What's going on?" Adam mumbled and processed whom was there.

Anger rose through him when he noticed Will was there. Will stood quiet as Adam protectively pulled Becky closer and rested his head on her shoulder.

"We'll get out of your hair. Just came by to grab my books." She started to grab her stuff and once she was done, dragged Will along with her.

The estranged couple looked at one another and laughed; that was awkward. "Why is it that this always seems to happen?" There had been several occasions when someone had walked in on them during any form of intimate moment.

She giggles at this and shrugs "Come here." She keeps the blanket tucked under her arms to remain covered and her hands rest on his face as she pulls him in for a sweet kiss.

In the back of his mind, he finds it weird that he gives in so easily to all of this when he knows they are yet to put together their relationship.

But even those thoughts don't keep him from returning the kiss.

::

Adam settles at the end of the bench and faces her; one leg tucked under him and he sips his coffee slowly.

After the encounter with Will and Leslie, they only remained in bed for a few minutes. They soon changed and got cleaned up before heading on campus for a coffee. Now they sit outside.

"I should have gotten it iced." He states out loud. He continuously forgets that it gets warmer during the day in Florida as he is so use to Canada being freezing at this time of month.

Becky on the other hand got juice, as she wasn't tired from the night before, unlike Adam who had a hang over. "Adam." She calls out his name to get his attention, as his eyes seem to look around campus.

His blue eyes look into her own as he waits for her to continue, but she finds herself staring at him. She missed him so much and now she was finally taking him in; he looked rather similar to the last time they had seen each other but she couldn't stop looking.

"Becks." He now spoke up, as she seemed to have lost her voice, "I love you." It was the first time he had said it to her this visit. "Do you love me?"

"Of course I do!" She didn't hesitate, looking at him in bewilderment.

"Then why did you break up with me?"

She rubs her temple and sighs, "Because I couldn't handle the distance, Adam. It kills me not having you near me. It's like being in a relationship but at the same time you're not. You're there for me emotional, supportively, but not physically. After what we did this summer, I hate not having the physical part."

"I do, too, Becky. Do you think I'm fine without having you there?" Adam was growing upset. She wasn't alone in how she was feeling, he felt the same but she seemed to be oblivious to it.

"No, at times I feel like you are totally fine. I see pictures of you going out and of others posting pictures of you with them. It's just unfair and you look happy in those pictures and I don't know." Becky was getting emotional and felt so much was slurring through her head.

"I'm happy because I have you in my life. I know you're not physically there but having you, as my girlfriend is all I need. I do need you; I need your voice and your texts and your letters because without it I'm miserable. That's what keeps me going." He sat up straight and placed both feet on the bench. "I do need you."

They both stayed quiet for just a moment, before Adam spoke again. "Is that why you went for Will? Because he's here for you emotionally and physically?"

Becky looked away as she felt bad for hurting both Will and Adam by kissing Will, "Yes. He was there, he was helping me, and I was craving something; _anything._"

"So you gave in? Wow." He shook his head. He had more control than her and seemed to have more faith in the relationship than she, "If I even looked at a girl a certain way you would be angry and then you dump me at an instant because he was there for you."

"Adam, it's not like-"

"Not like what? You prefer someone here with you and that's obvious. He's here and that's all you care for. If that's the case then we're done." He looked right into her eyes and started to push himself away, "If having someone here is what you need, so be it."

"Stop, you're what I need." Becky spoke with confidence. "I'm sorry I kissed him and clearly hurt our trust. I regret it because I'm in love with you with all my being, so when I kissed him there wasn't anything there; just lust. He was physically there and I wanted physical comfort but you give me so much more than that. Last night proved that."

What did they did in bed the night before wasn't new to them as Adam pleasured her with his fingers for the longest time; bringing her over the edge twice. She had wanted to return the favor but after drinking the whole night, he was tired and knew getting a hard on would be, well, hard.

"You give me love." Becky wanted to move closer to him but knew she should let him take the lead in that, "If it weren't for the distance, we would be happy."

Adam sat properly and sat closer to her; Becky smiled at the closeness. "I do love you, a lot." They held each other's hands, and intertwined their fingers. He caught sight of the promise ring that was still on her finger, as his was still on the chain of his necklace.

"Then forgive me, please. Take me back." She whispered at him and caressed his cheek, "Take me back."

He smiled with a sigh. Of course he would take her back, which was his sole purpose for coming to Florida in the first place.

"You're mine as I am yours."

* * *

_Sorry it took so long to update! been busy. hope you enjoy the fallout of the fight and break up hehe._


	22. Tying Up Loose Ends

"Will, I just don't have feelings like that for you."

Becky was in the student lounge with Will, since Will had contacted her earlier about wanting to talk and apologize for leaving her at the party. She said it was all right as Adam had came to the rescue.

"Then why did you kiss me?"

Will was a little irritated at this back and forth that was occurring with them. They kiss; she pulls away. They kiss again, Adam interrupts. They attended the party together; she left with Adam.

"Because I just needed something like a hook up, I guess. I'm sorry for even remotely thinking of using you in that way." Becky apologized and crossed her legs.

She kept distance between them, as she didn't want him getting the wrong idea.

He ran his fingers through his hair and groaned, "I really like you and I thought we had a chance. We connect, Becks. I'm here and he's not, so."

Her eyebrows rose up in surprise at his words. "I love him and he'll be coming to the school next time around. I only have to go so long before seeing him again. And honestly, it's none of your business why I choose to be with him and not you."

She began to stand up and grab her bag. He had no right to question her, as she had never committed to anything with him. A simple kiss was shared between them and she thought it was faith that Adam had shown up.

"Look, I get it. I'll move on. You're a great friend and I don't want to lose you." Will stood up as well and stood in front of her.

Becky nodded, knowing she would have to leave some time before they reconnect again on a friendship level, as it was obvious he did need to move on.

They shared a hug before she left.

::

Adam was starting to fall asleep on her bed when he heard Becky come in.

He groaned out a hello as she spoke, "Wow, glad you're happy to see me."

"I'm just tired, baby. And this bed is-" Adam huffed out a breath when he felt Becky jump on him. She was laughing as she straddled his lap. "Very comfortable."

"I know, but I prefer the comforts of my bed at home." She admitted. The following year she would be living at her parents as her scholarship only required she live on campus for two years. She could easily commute to school.

"I would love if you stayed at my house next year." Becky looked down at him with a small grin. Adam would be staying on campus but she loved staying with him at night, as he loved it too.

Adam bit his lip. The thought scared him a little as her dad put strict rules on them last time and he would prefer they live together once they were married. "Or you can stay on campus and I could sneak into your bed at night." He smirked as she ran her fingers along his bicep.

"I could run that idea across my dad." She smiled and leaned down to kiss him.

::

"Wow, this is crazy."

They were strolling on campus again on a Saturday night. It was lively and Adam enjoyed every ounce of it. Becky was leading them to a party Rico had told Adam about.

They had stayed in for the evening and watched movies and talked. Now it was almost eleven and the parties were beginning. Adam enjoyed any sort of gathering better when Becky was by his side, so they took advantage of this.

"You should loosen up tonight, Becks." Adam told his girlfriend once they found the frat house. "I mean, you can do whatever but I'm curious to see a tipsy Becky."

She chuckled and shook her head in amusement. She wasn't one to drink a lot but she had tried it here and there when she was in a mood.

The kitchen held all the drinks, so this was their first destination. Adam poured out two shots and handed one to her. She took it with a small smile, thinking why not? Both chugged it down at the same time.

"Don't get too crazy, okay?" Becky said as Adam moved to stand behind her, as if shielding her from any danger. "You were out of it last night."

His head rested on her shoulder and he sighed, "I was out of it last night but you enjoyed it." Adam whispered into her ear and she felt goose bumps form on her neck.

"The night is young." Adam smiled and kissed her neck.

* * *

_short chapter! anyways i wanted to know if my readers would want me to continue updating every two/three weeks or to update weekly? i do have around up to chapter 40 done so posting weekly wouldn't be a problem. at the same time i like to keep the suspension going hehe. just let me know._

_also someone said to bring fiona into the story and i wonder how i would even incorporate that lol._

_btw this is the last chapter for their second year of college. they'll be like a nine month jump to their third year in college when they'll finally attend the school together! thanks for reading guys. please review on how often you want me to update &amp; any ideas. xx_


	23. No More Goodbye's

_Rated M for explicit content._

* * *

"You need to be safe and careful."

Audra was wiping tears as she was saying goodbye to her son. It was move in day for transfer students so it was time to start his journey in Florida with Becky. Becky stood there watching, feeling emotional herself just from watching.

"Don't worry, mom. I'll call you every day." He reassured her and hugged her goodbye. Following by a goodbye hug from his father. Drew couldn't make it as he went back to California the week before.

Adam waved goodbye as they drove off and Becky went to comfort her boyfriend. "Are you okay?" She embraced him and rested her head right on his shoulder. He had had another growth spurt and now stood at 6'1, Becky only four inches shorter.

"Yeah, it was time to move out. You know?" His arms wrapped around her and held her close.

The months after the break up weren't as difficult as they thought it would of been. They had seen each other twice after he had surprised her to reconcile the relationship. The time passed by so quickly and now they were finally attending the same school.

"What about I make you some macaroni and cheese?" Becky looked up at him with a bright smile; she loved cooking for him. His apartment that was off campus had a kitchen that he would share with two other roommates.

"Sounds delightful." Adam grins and plants a kiss on her forehead.

::

"Dude, took you long enough!" Adam embraced Brian with a bro hug.

Brian transferred to the school as well and they decided to become roommates, with Rico as their third.

"Becky made mac and cheese." He offers Rico some food as soon as Becky appears from the bathroom.

She quickly runs to greet him in a hug, "You made it! I was worried but not as worried as Adam." She smirks and kisses Adam cheek before moving to the living room.

Adam soon helped Brian move his stuff in as he had driven alone to the college. His parents couldn't tag along and would make it up by coming the following weekend.

"It's so hot, I don't understand." Adam complained as he sat down besides Becky with his shirt removed. He had never experienced such heat before. "No wonder you have such a great tan."

Becky laughed and couldn't help but agree, the blazing sun gave her skin a perfect glaze of brown but she wasn't much darker than Adam. "You'll get use to it.." Her hand grazed his treasure trail and found herself cuddling into Adam's sweaty side.

Brian reappeared and threw himself on to the couch, "Will I need to buy some headphones to block out the sex noises?" He smirked, teasing them, as he knew they still remained virgins.

"Fuck off." Adam flung a pillow at Brian, "I will need those headphones."

"I'll add them on the grocery list." Becky added and they all laughed.

::

"I'm happy you're staying the night with me." Adam locked the door and smiled at the sight of his naked girlfriend in bed.

Becky returned his smile and found herself so happy at this very moment.

They were finally together after two years of so much pain and hurdles, especially the small break up. The way he was looking at her made her melt with desire and love as he always had this look in his eyes before he would pleasure her.

But now after almost a year of him pleasuring her, she would return the favour. Whenever she would try he would push her hand away saying it's okay, but not today. She was going to get him to climax without a doubt.

As soon as he got into bed, they were kissing. It slowly escalated, as they weren't in any rush; no one would walk in this time around. She climbed on top of him and pulled away to look down at him with a grin.

Becky moved her hips against his member and moaned as if this were the first time they were doing this. She was trying to get him hard and it was working as he moaned beneath her. His hand was already traveling down to rub her but she shook her head.

"You're coming this time, Adam." She spoke with such confidence, that Adam sighed at her words.

"Are you sure?" He licked his lips as her mouth began to travel down his body at such a slow pace. Soon enough her hand was on his erection and his head leaned back, "Oh..."

The blonde looked up as she continued to gently squeeze and tug him. Her gaze went from his face to his equipment. He had been on t-shots for over three years so he grew to be four inches down below, which was surprising since many who were on the shots would only reach two inches.

Her finger grazed on his tip and that's when he opened his eyes to see her. "Becky.." He began to beg for her to go faster in any way.

What she did next surprised him as he had never gone down on her, but she wasn't hesitant to put her lips on him. That's when he moaned out loudly; Brian would be pissed.

"Fuck, oh my god." She was teasing him with licks and then took him into her mouth. Her full lips felt amazing and after imagining this for so long it felt surreal.

Her slender fingers were on his balls, massaging them, as her head bobbed up and down on his length like a professional. When she had pulled away to suck at the tip, he warned her about coming but she urged for him to come.

Adam's hips unexpectedly thrust up when he did release inside her mouth, "Oh f-fuck." He was panting, as his breath seemed to disappear after such pleasure.

Becky smiled as she kissed her way back up his body, proud she had finally gotten to pleasure him and she enjoyed it to her surprise. Her hands went from his sides to his arms and she smiled down at him, "how was that?"

His eyes opened and tiredly smiled, "Fucking amazing." She didn't discipline his language, as in bed she was very vocal and used profanity; so this was a pass for him as well. "You're fucking amazing."

Without any hesitation he pulled her face down to kiss her with as much passion he could muster.


	24. Boobs

Adam grinned at the sight of his girlfriend approaching.

He sat outside in front of the fountain on campus. All his classes were done for the day and he couldn't be happier of how the first day went.

In the classes, he had connected with a handful of people and quickly befriended them as his personality always attracted people towards him. One wanted to hang out later that day but in all honesty he wanted to go back to his apartment with Becky.

He hadn't seen her all day and even after being apart for so long in the first few years of college, he wasn't use to being away from her. Every day he fell more in love and craved to be around her. Sometimes he felt as if he loved her more than she loved him, but he was okay with that. Adam knew Becky loved him till the end of time, but there was no way her love could surpass his in his opinion.

"Hi, love." Becky greeted him with a small and kiss to his cheek.

Her day had been busy and still wasn't over with as she had to attend Belief of the Bible meeting, as she had become the Vice President of the club. The first day was nice but being on campus already for two years made her already very involved into the school and various activities.

She had received a text from Adam earlier about meeting up just for a while since they wouldn't see each other until she went to his for dinner.

"Hi, baby. How was your day?" Adam asks as she sits down besides him.

"It was good. Classes seem interesting! The teacher assistant gig isn't as bad as I thought it would be." Becky smiles. Being a teachers aid had put her a bit nervous but going into now, it was fun. She would get to help the students and learn much from the professor.

They spoke about their day and soon enough had to separate, as she had to go.

::

"Becky."

"Adam." She smiles at him as she wraps her arms around his neck and pulled him closer to press heir bodies together once more.

After her meeting, she came to his place to be greeted by a dinner he had made her. She always loved when he went out of his comfort zone to do something for her. He barely knew how to cook but the meal he prepared was good enough for her.

Right after, they had gotten into bed and pleasured each other vigorously. Adam had orally pleased her for the first time and after what seemed like hours, he finally stopped; he couldn't get enough of it. By then she was exhausted and was glad she had pleasured him first.

His fingers run along her side and he can't help but glance down at her body. They had come so far physically in the matter of just a little over a year. They wouldn't even share a bed together and now they couldn't get enough of each other's body. "I love you so much and you have No idea how happy I am we're finally together like this."

Becky's fingers grazed the back of his neck as he spoke. "Me too. Bad thing is that I never want to leave this bed."

"Then we don't have to." Adam smiles and gives her a gentle kiss before reaching for his cellular device.

"What are you doing?" She saw that he was taking pictures of their bodies pressed together.

"Showing everyone I made it to third base."

Her eyes widened and took the phone away, "Adam!"

Now he laughed and shook his head, "I'm kidding, but I really love that picture." He cuddled his head into her neck as she looked through the pictures.

"Fine, since you can't see my nips you can post it." Becky sighed and kissed his head. There was always a sense of peace during these moments where he would just cuddle into her body and hear nothing but her breathing. She could lie like this for hours.

Sadly, she had to go home. Her parents weren't aware of them being sexually intimate, unlike Adam's parents, and would prefer she be home at night. It was past nine and needed to go.

Adam led her to her car, where soon enough their lips were pressed against one another's again. She enjoyed the feel of his skin, as he hadn't bothered to get fully dressed since he would sleep soon enough.

"What if I just tag along with you and sneak into your room?" He whispered against her lips with a smirk before kissing her again, "Or stay with me."

She pulled him into an embrace as if silently telling him no. They shared another kiss before she drove away.

::

"Details, now!"

Christina made Becky jump in surprise as the blonde had just arrived to campus and was headed to the library.

"About what?"

Her friend gave her a look but as Becky continued to give her a confused look she explained. "Adam's picture?"

Becky soon made an "o" with her lips as she had completely forgotten. Just a second after she smiled. She remembered seeing it right before going to bed on his hastygram page. He had captioned it "incomplete without her next to me." There were various comments on her body but she didn't care.

"Did you both get it in?" Her friend smirks. Christina was surprised when she scrolled through and found that image. Becky was confident in her body but she couldn't see her being the one to let someone post a nude of her.

Not that it mattered. "And by the way, that body of yours- I'm jealous!"

Becky laughed and blushed; she was sorta embarrassed. "No we haven't got it in, we just kiss and stuff." She found that what she did in bed was personal and hoped Adam thought the same.

"Mhm, sure. Whatever you say!" Christina doubted this and knew Adam would spill, as they had become close friends too.

::

"Dude that nude." Brian clapped in appraisal, "and you even got her approval beforehand, wow."

Adam grinned in pride as comments on the photo had complimented his girlfriend's body and now Brian was worshipping him, "What can I say? I'm persuasive."

"Did you guys finally have sex?" Brian asked and soon enough Christina was right beside them at the table.

"Did you?"

The blue-eyed boy laughed at how intrusive she was. "No we didn't. We're just comfortable around one another."

Christina stared at him as she waited for him to add more; Brian did as well.

"And she's so fucking hot, oh my god. It's like I've died and went to heaven whenever I see her naked."

Brian smirked, "I believe that since you both never come out of your room for hours."

"Hey, at least all three of us know how her boobs look now." Christina added.

Adam grinned, "They're great fucking boobs."

::

"How dare you do that? I said you could post the picture not talk about our sex lives!"

Becky was standing and was yelling at her boyfriend across the living room. "My goodness, Adam. I'm not some sort of meat you can just show off to your-our friends!"

Christina had come up to her after her classes were up and had told her Adam had said without bad intentions. She was surprised Becky seemed so upset as she had let him put the picture up.

Becky hadn't expected for Adam to brag about her in any way.

"Baby, I'm sorry. I didn't think you would care as your boobs are pretty obvious in the picture." Adam stayed calm and was also confused as he thought he did nothing wrong.

He was expecting her to come to his apartment to do homework together but as soon as she walked in she was yelling.

"You have great boobs, it's obvious." He continued and glanced to her chest. Touching her was also on his agenda to do today. "A great everything."

"I'm just mad that you would talk about us like that in the first place. It's no ones business but ours, and I guess Brian and Rico's since they live right there." She motioned to the other two bedrooms and was happy they were alone for this argument.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think it would bother you. I apologize." He stood there looking down. He screwed up. "I love you."

Becky felt her heart race at the three words and sighed, already giving into his apology. She set her bag down and walked towards him. "I just- That's our personal life, okay? I don't care if they see my boobs as long as they see them next to your body, because I'm yours. All the things we do, that's between us because I'm yours as you are mine."

His finger twirled a strand of her hair and he apologized once more, understanding where she was coming from. If she were to speak about his package down below to anyone else, he would be upset.

"You are mine, all mine." Her hands were on his hips and she leaned in to kiss him.

They kissed briefly before he led them to the bedroom to claim what is his.

* * *

_soon it's obvious the readers want for me to update weekly lol. i'll do my best as i can. i'll most likely cost two chapters at once every week! thanks xx_


	25. Homesickness

Adam curled more into his bed and groaned.

He was hit with homesickness and didn't feel like going to class or doing anything for that matter. It had been almost three months since leaving Canada and it just felt weird not seeing his mom or dad for so long.

The distance sucked and at times he wished he could just drive to his parents place and see them for a little bit. Phone calls weren't enough. He had no idea how Drew survived the first year being away.

His phone vibrated and he knew it must be Becky as he hasn't texted her this morning. She had come over last night for just an hour before going back to her place.

Leaving his home country was a good idea as his relationship with Becky was in a great place but his family was back in Canada.

"How you feeling today?" Rico asked Adam when he entered the kitchen.

"I'm okay. Skipping classes today." Adam confessed.

He had mentioned to both Rico and Brian that he missed it back home and they both understood. Brian had transferred with him just this year and felt the same pain he felt, but he had a few family members in the state. Rico was going through his second year and still could relate to being away.

Sometimes you just needed to go back home.

A few hours later, Becky showed up to the apartment. Adam had given her a key to the apartment and to his door.

He had texted her how he was feeling and she felt bad. She didn't really know what he was going through, as she had never been apart from her family for so long. The only reason he had left was because of her.

"Baby?" She called out once opening his bedroom door just a bit. She saw his figure under the blanket and realized his was sleeping when she heard his soft snores.

A smile was on her face, as he seemed at peace.

She crawled in beside him as best as she could to not wake him.

She ran her fingers gently down his arm and sighed to herself. She was glad he was at peace now, but when he wakes up she knew he would be sad once more. She didn't know he would struggle with being so far away from his family and blames herself for his sadness.

The body next to hers began to shift as her nails now ran along his bicep. His arm stretched out over her as if subconsciously he knew she was there. Looking at him now, she couldn't help but think of how she can't completely blame herself.

He chose to be here to be with her. They made each other happy and she would help him in any way possible to cheer him up.

::

"Ah, ha! Told you I could win!"

Becky cheered and poked her boyfriend's arm. Adam smiled and sighed as his girlfriend had defeated him at Super Smash Bros.

"I know your tricks." She shifted to straddle her lap as the game controller was pushed aside.

They held each other's gazes as Adam spoke, "And now I know yours." He grinned and looked down to reach for her hand.

Rico walked through the door and greeted them both. He wasn't surprised to see Becky there, much so on Adam's lap. It was a regular occurrence to run into her.

"How you feeling, man?" Rico grabbed a banana and plopped down on the beanbag chair.

Adam shrugged as Becky moved off him to sit beside him. "I'll deal. I'll see them soon enough." He settled his head onto Becky's shoulder as she caressed his hair.

They soon watched television together as Becky continued to comfort her boyfriend to the best of her abilities.

::

"Why didn't you buy me a ticket?" She asked in confusion.

Adam sighed and leaned over the kitchen island. They were in her house, a rare occurrence. He had come over to tell her the news in hopes she'll react well.

Becky stared at him as he tried to reach for her hand but she pulled it away, she didn't want to be touched as a single touch could easily make her forgive him.

"I just want to be with my family, Becks. You can be with yours and I'll be with mine." Adam began to explain.

Winter break was coming up in the next week and Becky had told him beforehand that she wanted to go with him as they had never spent Christmas together in almost the four years of being together.

She squinted her eyes, not understanding. "So what? You just don't want to be around me? Is that it?"

That's all she could concur from his explanation. "No. Just, your parents said no s-"

"My parents?! Really, Adam? I'm almost 21 years old; I will do what I want to do. What's the real reason?" Becky pushed for his answer and he seemed to be sugar coating it.

He sighs and rubs the back of his neck while he continues to stay silent.

Becky doesn't tolerate it as she stands and tells him to leave if he isn't going to talk or explain anything. She walks away from him but he follows her.

"Baby, my parents are se-parating." His voice cracks as he finally says the truth. She had her back turned to him so when she faces him, she notices sadness in his face.

The same sadness he's had for the past weeks. He was homesick, his parents were calling less, and Drew was calling more often. She was missing the signs that there was something more than just missing Toronto.

"Oh my goodness, love. I'm so sorry." She approached him and pulled him in an embrace where he seemed to pull her closer as if he needed more of her. "It's okay."

It seemed like only a few seconds before he pulled away and started to pace as if everything were coming down at once. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. They're still setting this up and they want privacy and drew and I were hoping something would change that's why we didn't tell anyone."

"That's why I didn't buy your ticket because they probably don't want guests in the house." He was lost and overwhelmed. His parents were what he had set his idea of love to be; one balances the other out and vice versa. Audra and Omar were opposites but they loved each other. Omar had come into her life after Audra left Adam's biological father, whom he never spoke about.

"First my bio dad, now Omar. So what now, will I be Adam Roberts? Oh my god that sounds so wrong." He was rambling and Becky grabbed his face to get his attention.

"Look at me. It's going to be okay" she caressed his cheeks before placing her hands on his shoulders. "It's all going to be okay. I will be there by your side if you want me or not. You'll get through this."


	26. Punching Bag

"Mom, I'm sorry."

Audra shook her head at her son. He had just arrived back to Toronto but she wasn't expecting for him to bring Becky along. He knew what the family was going through and Becky being there wouldn't help the situation.

Audra and Omar had just had an outburst upstairs about the sleeping conditions as Drew had arrived to the house as well. Audra didn't mind him staying as she viewed him as his own son but Omar wasn't pleased. It was as if they were trying to gain custody even if both Drew and Adam were already past the age of 18.

Drew had decided to stay at the house, as he didn't want to stay at a hotel with his father.

"You should have told me beforehand, Adam." Audra explained and soon sighed. She hadn't seen her son for almost four months and it was sad she couldn't enjoy it because of this situation.

They hugged it out and Adam walked off to his room upstairs. Becky was in the basement with Drew, expecting him to come down but Adam wanted to be alone.

The family situation was a mess. He felt like crying at the mere thought of not having Omar as his legal dad any longer. Sure, he could still call him dad and Drew his brother but not seeing him around Audra would be weird.

How will Christmas go and all the other holidays? He's spent them all with his Omar and Drew since the age of five and now he would have to spend it with only his mother and Becky?

It was too weird.

He flipped over to stuff his face into the pillow as he continued to think. The marriage was fine but his mother let him know that he had began to crumble just the year before but didn't let it show. They would disagree more often and had come to the conclusion they had only stayed together for so long for the sake of the kids.

Adam and Drew had a great bond and without each other, they would of turned out different. Drew protected Adam at all instances and Adam helped drew when it came to life decisions.

But his mom wasn't happy. Shouldn't he be happy that she's going to move on a proceed happiness?

This sucked.

::

She dragged her nails over his chest and looked up at her quiet boyfriend.

They lied in bed together, undressed but tame. Adam hadn't been in any moods of late to receive or give pleasure, and Becky understood. They did remain nude as Adam felt comfort from feeling her body simply just resting against his.

But again he was lost into thought. Lately, she couldn't get him to converse before sleeping that was odd as they always spoke before going to bed. Now, it would be of a shock if he were to have a normal conversation with her.

"Is your mom mad at us?" She spoke up, knowing she would have to ask him in order to know.

His fingers rang along the curve of her back and he glanced down at her, "Sorta, but she'll get over it. I need you here."

Those words made her smile up at him and she planted a kiss on his collar.

"You're my rock."

::

Drew watched as his brother made dinner with Becky.

Audra was in bed and Omar was busy working, so Drew stuck around the couple. Dallas wasn't welcome to stay at their house because of the circumstances and he most likely wouldn't return as he had moved to another province with Rocky's mom.

That made him sad but he was set up to meet him later into the break.

He saw as Adam laughed at one of Becky's flat jokes, which made Drew make a face as Becky's comedy he never seemed to understand.

Drew was worried. Now that his father's marriage ended in shambles, he didn't want his brother going through the same. He knew for a fact Adam was meant to be with Becky but he didn't want Adam to ruin the relationship by doing what dad did; cheat.

Now he knows why he could never commit, as it seemed his dad passed down that flaw. He felt sorry for his mom, as she didn't deserve that. Audra was his mom, no question. That woman who had given birth to him wasn't worth the title as she felt out left him with his dad and disappeared.

Audra was always his mom and would never be replaced. And Drew knew Adam felt the same way when it came to their dad. Only difference is Adam knew where his bio dad was.

He hoped Adam wouldn't sink to the level to replace Omar. The situation made him angry. He would technically lose a brother and mother but in his heart that wouldn't change just by a piece of paper.

"Bro?" Adam clapped in front of Drew's face and laughed when Drew jumped.

"What the hell?"

"We want to know if you want ham on your side?"

::

"Hey, it's alright.." Becky rubbed the shoulders of her boyfriend and gently planted a kiss on the back of his neck.

They had gone downstairs to the basement after Omar and Audra had fought once more in the kitchen. Adam was tense and she wasn't sure how to help but to comfort him physically.

As she continued to rub his shoulders, he tensed. Adam was sitting on the side of the bed as she was on her knees behind him. She tried to soothe him but it wasn't working, "Stop." He shook his shoulders to get his hands off him. "It's not _okay _or _alright_, this is not an okay situation!" His voice was raised, as he seemed to be taking his anger out on her.

Becky just looked up at him and sighed, feeling defeated once more as he constantly used her as a punching bag. A fight for a fight wasn't going to fix the situation. This wasn't the first time he had exploded but it was getting exhausting as she was trying her hardest to make him feel better.

The first time was the second night they were in the house together; she had cried afterwards as she felt she was failing as a girlfriend, as his support. After the third time, she just moved on and let it be.

Adam watched as she stood up and grabbed her bag off the nightstand, "Are you leaving?" She wasn't one to walk away from any sort of situation so it awed him that she would be doing this now.

She leaned over to kiss his cheek, "I'll be back later," was all she said before walking out the room. She'll let him settle his own anger, as she knew she didn't deserve to be treated the way he was treating her. She had come along to support him and to be there for him, but all he was doing was pushing her away—so why be around him at all?

Drew found his brother punching the old punching bag Drew had used in his high school days—he couldn't believe his mother still had it five years later.

Adam was sweating and his hands were red, scuffed up from not using any protection. Drew at times would be shell shocked at how much his brother had changed physically, now was one of those times. Adam was now taller than Drew and more physically fit but still thinner. If they were to ever fight, Drew wouldn't have a clue to who would win.

He wasn't too surprised Adam was taking it so far as to make his knuckles bleed as he took out his pain through actual physical pain—proven before by his old self inflicted cuts.

"Bro, come on. You need to stop." Drew tried his best to shove Adam away from the punching bag but he wouldn't stop. Looking around he found no sign of Becky, which made him curious.

"She's not here, she left." Adam finally spoke up and threw a harder punch to the bag, which made him winch; making him stop. Drew took the opportunity to block the way from hitting again. "She left hours ago and isn't answering."

The older Torres sighed and patted his brother's shoulders. They were both taking the divorce hard and knew Adam wouldn't admit it to him, as Adam was always the one to remain strong in every situation. "She'll be back and stay as long as you apologize for whatever you did."

"I didn't do any—"

"Dude." Drew gave him a look to rethink it through. He wasn't the smartest brother but he could see his affection towards his girlfriend was slowly going away. Adam was always touchy but now almost two weeks in to the break he seemed distant. "It's almost Christmas and you need to make it up to her."

The sweaty teen looked away as he had forgotten the holiday was coming up and it was Becky's favorite.

He needed to fix this.


	27. Almost Making

Adam's eyes went up when she heard the clicking for the basement door. He smiled just the slightest as he saw his girlfriend walk in.

"Hey." She greeted him softly and quietly shut the door as it had become late.

She had gone to visit Clare, who was also in town for the holidays. She felt Clare could relate to what Adam was going through and seeked her advice on how to help him. Clare had given the best advice she could, as she knew Adam was stubborn and would close off completely when he wanted to.

Becky found herself sticking around longer than she had hoped as Clare's mother had offered her dinner followed by some Karaoke. She would never turn down a challenge of singing along to her favorite ninety tunes.

"I'm happy you're back." Adam gave her no time to come towards him as he was already bringing her in for a tight embrace. One of his biggest fears was that she would leave and never return—but she was there now.

She took in his scent—he smelled like the coconut body wash she had in the shower; this made her smile. "Of course, silly." She pulled back and reached for his hand, a wear texture caught her attention and she soon noticed the bandaging around his knuckles. "Adam, what happened?!"

Her protective instincts kicked in and she assumed he got into a tussle with Drew or some sort but before she could freak out Adam told her about the idiotic way he was taking out his angry, "Why were you so angry?"

"I don't know. I just keep screwing up, babe, with you that is." He paused as he took in the pinkness of her face from the cold—she looked adorable. "I'm sorry for taking my anger out on you, Becks. You don't deserve that and you're like the greatest girlfriend ever for being here with me and I've been treating you like crap."

"You're right, I don't deserve that." If Adam had done this to her when they had first started dating she would of seen it as normal or had blamed herself for his anger—but people grow and she's grown and changed so much, just like Adam. "You're mad at the world and I get how it feels to be that angry, but that gives you no right to yell at me or push me away when I'm trying to help."

Adam remained quiet as she spoke strongly about this. At this point he was holding her fingers in his hands as he found this touch soothing. His eyes never left hers as her words continued to hit him deep; he wasn't treating her right and he would treat her better.

::

"W-Wow."

She was taking deep breaths as it seemed like all form of air had escaped her lungs during tonight's activity. Adam shifts up and looks at her with a silly grin before brushing their lips together for a gentle kiss.

"Who knew you liked it rough?" Adam smirks down at her and laughs as she attempts to move him off her.

"Who knew you had that in you?" She countered with and was satisfied when he made an expression of fake offense.

After apologizing for his actions, Becky and Adam had gone to bed with sleep on Becky's mind but Adam had other thoughts. There was this urge going through him that made him climb on top of her and kiss her neck. Becky was taken aback as he hadn't been in the mood lately but fully complied as she had been dying for some intimacy like this.

Adam had even taken it further by being even more aggressive and enduring, and she _loved _it. He was biting and scratching at her skin, pinning her down as he took every form of control he could get. She found it so sexy and intoxicating that she took her turn to do the same to him—soon enough pleasuring him until the reach of an orgasm.

"You have no idea what I can do, baby." He smiled and kissed her once more as she rolled on top of him. "I love you so much." His voice now softened as she looked down at him with so much emotion and love towards him. The past week had been such a blur from the downfall of his parent's love that he was letting his relationship get impacted by it.

There was no way he would ever let Becky feel unloved in any way.

"And I love you. I love everything about you." Her fingertip ran along the bottom of his lip as she remained quiet for just a second, "The way you always seem to apply deodorant _after _putting your shirt on and how you smile at the first sight of snow as if you've never seen snow before, and how your skin gets goose bumps when I just run my finger right here..." She demonstrated as her long finger ran down the side of his neck to his collarbone, goose bumps forming on his skin just how she predicted, "From all those little things to the big. Don't you forget that."

Adam found himself speechless, as he seemed to have fallen more in love with her, if that were even possible. Becky squealed as Adam flipped them over once more; a smile on their faces as he tended to her again in a much gentler fashion—finding it the only true way to express his love for her.

::

Christmas had come around and Becky had never felt such joy on her favorite holiday.

Adam had woken her up earlier than usual and to her surprise it wasn't to go open the presents—they had the most intense, intimate, slow, and satisfying love making session. Almost making as she called it; they were yet to cross that line.

Either way she found it to be perfection.

After, they had joined Audra upstairs to open the gifts under the tree. Drew didn't join them, as he was to spend it with his father with his grandparents. Becky could tell this saddened Adam but he seemed to be taking it easier as time passed by.

The gifts she got filled her with joy as Audra had given her the newest karaoke game, Drew gave her a dress that was a shade of blue that matched perfectly with Adam's eyes, Omar gave her a new purse, and Adam surprised her in their room by giving her a beautiful pearl necklace with matching earrings. She argued that it was too much but he disagreed and placed it on her after she got dressed.

There was this happiness that over came her by spending Christmas with the man she loved. She found herself staring at him when they went ice-skating and when they came back home to enjoy dinner with his mother. Just the simplest things made her stomach fill with butterflies from happiness.

Sure, Christmas was always fun with her family—she always remembered every moment and every gift ever received. But as she had spent this whole day with him, there was this desire to spend every holiday with him in their future and hopefully with their future family.

Becky admitted this to him when the end of the day had come in they were in bed. She opened up her heart to him about the future and couldn't wipe the smile off her face when he admitted that he felt exactly the same.

They ended the day with how they started—sharing a loving, passionate moment of pleasure before falling asleep in each other's arms.

* * *

_again, next chapter takes another leap! not so big though, just leaps through their winter break and skips to their spring break. which means their junior year of college is almost up! xx_


	28. Spring Break: Part I

"Baby! I got a surprise!"

Adam grinned as he held the small cage in his hands. He was walking into his apartment and knew Becky would be there as they had a study day planned out.

Becky came out of his room in one of his t-shirts and her shorts. His lips formed into a smile at the sight—he would never get over how hot his girlfriend always looked.

A small meow was heard for the cage and Becky looked down with wide eyes, "Oh my god! Adam, you didn't?"

"But I did." Adam was taking out the white kitty from the cage and held her close to his chest. "I told you I had your present here in Florida."

She had turned twenty-one the last day of December and he said he had forgotten the gift he had bought back at school; she was quite disappointed but let it go. But in all honesty he had picked out the cat before leaving back to Canada. He had gone to the shelter after they had one of their midnight conversations about raising a pet together.

He knew a cat was the best choice, as dogs needed more attention, which wasn't possible because of their hectic school lives. Seeing the smile on her face, he made the right choice.

"Happy birthday, Becks." Adam had handed the baby cat to his girlfriend and planted a gentle kiss on her cheek.

Becky felt emotional as it was her time of the month and her emotions were all over the place. The sweetness of this act and all his planning and just the way he said her name with such joy brought tear to her eyes. She kissed the bundle of joy gentle, already knowing what to name her.

"Lets name her, Flurry."

He chuckled at the name and agreed, finding it the perfect fit.

::

Flurry pranced around the apartment as the couple packed for their spring break trip to Southern Florida—Miami to be exact. They were headed down with some of their friends as they had booked a beach house with everyone pitching in.

"This is going to be fucking epic!" Rico shouted out as he had finished packing earlier. "But I'm going to miss my best buddy." He picked up the cat and kissed its head.

Becky giggled at the sight at how he could go from crazy, frat boy Rico to sweet, kindled Rico. They were going to leave Flurry with her parents, as no one would be in the apartment for the week.

A knock was heard on the door before several friends came in.

"Condoms for you! Condoms for you!" Will threw Green Square packages in the air and Leslie laughed at this behavior.

"Giving them away since you wont need any." Rebecca commented with a wink. She was a friend of Adam's that she had made as they were both majoring the same thing. It was sort of weird though when he had to call her name, as her name was Becky's full name.

Will smirked and picked up a few, stuffing them back in his pockets. Will and Adam had gotten on better terms, as Adam was not one to hold a grudge. After Becky assured herself he was past his feelings for her, he befriended him once more and Adam was okay with it. The boys weren't the greatest friends but they would get along—For Becky's sake.

::

"How is it possible that it's even hotter down here?"

Adam didn't mind the heat but it would still astound him how hot it would be down in Florida. No wonder Becky loved it down here, as she was a huge fan of summer.

From afar she could see a crowd of crazy college students on the beach were a DJ was playing. It was the second day of spring break and yet you can tell how crazy it would get.

"Don't act like you don't love it." Becky smirked in his direction and he chuckled, she was right. "You will love it. It's basically a five day long party on this block—"

"She's right. Alcohol, drugs, sex, and music for five days straight, plus the girls in bikini's." Alex, a friend they had made while being in the library, added as he joined them in front of the beach house. Two girls passing by the house caught his attention. "It's going to be epic." It was his senior year and he would enjoy this last spring break.

"I don't know about you but girl's in bikini's do nothing as a see a naked girl _every day_." Adam smirked and it took Becky a second to process before she blushed and gave Adam a kiss on his neck. She had become less shy about any sort of sexual reference as she had become more comfortable around her friends and Adam, of course.

"Hey, man, so do I!" Alex grinned; it wasn't a lie.

"Yeah, this dude probably has a STD by now." Leslie walked out and couldn't help but comment.

"Do _you_ have a STD? No? Then I don't!"

Adam laughed as he always forgets the two have slept together on various occasions. Becky found herself leaning onto her boyfriend's body and found comfort that she didn't have to deal with the stresses of not being satisfied or of having a STD.

::

"They're so cute." Rico was drunk and out on the porch as he watched Adam and Becky stroll the beach.

He had to admit he was jealous that one of his closest friends had such a long, enduring relationship. The guy had been with Becky since eleventh in high school and later this year Adam would be entering his last year of college. "Four years, that's crazy man."

Brian laughed as he had taken several shots, finding himself laughing at anything. "I wonder if they ever get tired of each other, shit."

Rico finished his beer and glanced over at his secret booty call. He grinned and Brian shook his head, "No fucking way."

Brian glanced out at the couple once more as Becky and Adam shared a quick kiss on shore. He then saw Rico's figure running towards the couple as he stripped and yelled out "Skinny dipping!"

Becky found her eyes to be covered by her boyfriend's as he told her not to look, in a playful manner of course. "As if I have an interest to look."

* * *

_read &amp; review! fair warning: something big is going to happen between them soon enough. a few of you have been asking for it so i hope you enjoy it heh. xx_


	29. Spring Break: Part II

The news of the divorce hit him hard.

And when his mother called earlier today that the papers had gone through it hit him harder.

She was no longer Audra Torres, but now Audra Heritz. That last name was so strange to him but as she had let Omar adopt him when the marriage was filed he had kept the last name Torres. It was his own decision if he was to change it but he had no desire, as that is his dad.

He did feel this urge in him to seek out his biological father. He knew where he lived and had his number, as a few times his bio dad had tried to contact him. But what was the point of that? He lived his whole life without the presence of Luis and having him in his life now served no purpose. What was he even thinking?

Becky noticed a slight shift in his mood after the phone call but she didn't push with the questions, as she knew he wanted to enjoy the break. It was the fourth day in for the spring break and it was hectic.

The second night they had spent time on the beach sober but last night they had both attended the concert in the evening and found himself drinking while Becky just watched. Tonight would be the same, as he needed to forget about his family issues at the moment.

He was in college and was going to party with his ridiculously hot girlfriend.

"Are you sure you want to go, baby?" Becky asked him once more as they stood outside the beach house. Their friends were already ahead of them but Becky wanted to make sure he was up for it. Her hands flattened down his tank top as he explained that he was okay.

"I just want to enjoy the night with you, and that's what we'll do." Adam kissed her forehead with such gentility it made Becky's knees buck. "I love you." He whispered to her.

::

Will glanced around the beach as he looked for any sight of his friends.

Only person he found was Becky- and he found himself smile just a little that it was she.

Sure, he told her the feelings weren't there but it wasn't a complete lie. He didn't feel as strongly about her but she's changed from that oblivious, religious girl he met freshmen year to this mature, strong, well-rounded woman. Of course she still expressed her views and lived by those morals, but she was more open-minded to activities college students committed.

She was lost in her world as she danced to the music and he felt himself crave her, as he always did. She was so attractive and most guys agreed that Adam was lucky. She was so tall and her long legs were beyond obvious in the short shorts she wore. The small crop top brought attention to her flat stomach and he just imagined what was under the shirt.

Not much was needed as Adam's old hastygram picture had shown her boobs.

Adam being here made it more obvious that Becky was head over heels for the guy. But Will was drunk and couldn't resist approaching her.

Becky was lost in thought, as she had drunk along Adam. She felt safe with him near her and knew drinking wasn't the most Christian behavior but as she had let herself explore all these activities the three years she's been at college. She enjoyed it and just because she drank didn't mean her whole religious belief was lost—Adam taught her that.

She soon felt hands on her hips and quickly assumed it was her boyfriend who had come back from the bathroom. No words were exchanged as she grinded up against him.

Will was in ecstasy as Becky seemed oblivious to who it was. They were both drunk and Becky would lose herself whenever she was at such state while Will would be lose any form of self control.

Adam grabbed a beer and grinned as he looked out at the crowd. The night was crazy as everyone was drunk and/or high. He was tempted to get some E as the music was intense and he heard that having sex on E was something worth doing at least once.

Having this thought, he remembered his girlfriend was waiting for him. He found her after a few minutes and was angry at the sight. She was against Will and she seemed to be clueless to who it was as her eyes were closed.

Becky felt a hand soon on her breast and that's when her eyes opened. She saw Adam approaching from just a few feet away and her eyes went wide, who was touching her?

She pushed away and looked back to see Will standing behind her. She was about to shout at him but Adam beat her to it.

"What the hell?" He was furious as he saw the scene unfold, "Becky?" He looked at her with pain in his eyes, feeling betrayed.

"Baby, I swear I thought it was you!" She shouted and stepped closer to him, feeling violated from the mere touch of Will's hand. She blinked various times to hold back tears as she never wanted such touch from any other man.

Adam could tell by the look on her face and the smug grin on Will's that she was telling the truth. "Fuck you." Adam gave Will the bird as he knew aiding Becky was more important than beating a guy to a pulp, that would come after.

Walking away from the scene, Adam ran his hands down Becky's side as if checking for any injuries. "Are you okay?" He looked her over and she pulled him near.

"I thought it was you, Adam. Oh my goodness, why would he even—who does that?" She had trusted Will the whole time they were friends and then he wanted to take advantage of her drunken state.

Adam ran his hands along her bare waist as he held her. "He's an asshole. Don't speak to him anymore." She didn't hesitate to nod.

There was a huge relief as she continued to feel his arms around her. He would always keep her safe-no matter what.


	30. Spring Break: Part III

"You are so beautiful, wow."

They kissed again for the hundredth time that night. After the Incident with Will, they decided to move on from it for the night. They drank more and Alex had given them each a half pill of E.

The effect hit them quick, as they were both filled with energy and soon enough horny.

It didn't take them long to go back to the beach house and into the room they were sharing for the remaining days there. Adam was thankful that Becky had very few clothes on to begin with. In the matter of seconds he had her naked and pinned up against the wall.

She looked down at him as he got on his knees and began to orally please her against the door. Her leg was propped up over his shoulder and her back arched against the door.

"Oh, Ad-am." She gasped between his names, as he took no time to penetrate her with his fingers. His mouth was on her clit and worked his now experience mouth and tongue as best he could to bring her over the edge.

He looked up at her as he propped her other leg over his shoulder and let his tongue enter her. At this point she was gripping his hair. What brought her to her orgasm was the sensation of his fingers curling in her at the exact moment his tongue passed over her clit. She groaned as the orgasm passed through her and it felt like lightning had just shocked her- The drugs added such pleasure.

Adam was standing once more and they shared a smile as she began to remove his pants. "You're so-"

"Sexy?" He cut her off with a grin.

"My, my, aren't you full of yourself?" She grinned and shoved his shoulders to push him towards the bed once she had finally removed his pants.

"I just say it how it is, baby." He pulled her close and took her down on the bed with him. They shared a sloppy kiss and their tongues collided.

His body was shivering all over from the heat of her hands when she ran them down his back to his boxers. When his crotch pressed up against her wetness he let out a loud moan, breaking the kiss as it was impossible to do two tasks at once in his drunken state.

Both his hands were on either side of her face as he grinded his hardness against her. "Fuck, Adam." Becky pushed his boxers down just enough to reveal him.

It must have been the drugs and alcohol but she wanted nothing more than for him to be inside her. She wanted to be filled with him. She wanted to be one with him as he pounds against her. Oh, how she craved his body.

Adam pressed himself even closer between her legs as she adjusted her legs over his thighs and wrapped them around his waist. "Becky..."

"Yeah?" Becky gripped at his sides as she felt the brush of his tip along her entrance.

"I want to fuck you."

That's all it took. Even with the faint smell of alcohol from their breaths and the way his eyes were glazing over her didn't keep her from pushing him away at that moment.

Within seconds she agreed and let him. "Look at me." Becky whispered to him as he aligned himself. She was wet enough that he went in just as he was. He pushed inside her every so slowly that she felt every inch of him. "Oh my god." She tilted her head back when he was inside her completely.

"That's all of me." He grinned as he felt light hearted and at ease with everything in his system. "Mm..." He let out a long groan when he pressed up against her and finally took in that he was inside her.

He took in the sight of her, grateful that the light was still on. She lied beneath him in sweat that made her body shine in every area he enjoyed, her chest was rising up and down which made her breasts perk up, her hair was all over the place but he found it perfect.

Adam then leaned down to tug on her bottom lip, eliciting a moan from her mouth. She then kissed him full on as if it were the last kiss they would ever share. Her arms went around his neck, as she wanted him close, "Fuck me." She mumbled as they looked into one another's eyes.

He tried his best to go slow as he was immensely turned on. He rested his forearms on the pillow and let his body lie on hers fully. He grunted when he first moved his hips, as he had never felt so good before in his life.

"Becky, you feel amazing."

She let a smile form on her lips for just a second before she closed her eyes when he thrust hard. It was as if every sense was being hit at once. She didn't know whether to focus on him inside her or the way his moans sounded or the sweat forming on his shoulders or the way his chest was brushing right along her nipples. It's as if so much was going on at once she couldn't focus, but she wanted more.

Her fingernails pressed into his biceps, as he seemed to have adjusted his hips. He was going deeper, harder, faster. "Fuck, baby. O-Oh." There was nothing else she could focus on besides the pleasure that he was giving her.

Adam was moaning as he let his headrest against her neck. There was so much he wanted to do like kiss her, rub her, touch her, but all he could focus on was pounding against her. Thrust after thrust it didn't feel real that this was happening-but it was.

The way she moaned his name against his ear made him realize it was real. He was making love to her. He hoped he could remember every action later that morning.

Not much later, he was on the verge of coming. There wasn't a doubt in his mind he would release inside her. "I'm going to cum." His hips moved faster and she urged for him to. She desired for him to release.

"Come on then. Harder, Adam." She gripped his butt as he seemed to move even faster and when he bit down on her neck, she lost it. She spasmed beneath him and tightened herself around him—which made him grunt at the sensation.

Soon enough, he pounded once more before releasing inside her. He shuddered above her and felt it pass so slowly that he could feel every muscle in his body stiffen with pleasure, "Oh f-fuck." His hips thrust once more before every fiber of energy in his body left him. He let his body weight onto hers completely as he had no strength to hold himself up.

He rubbed his body against hers in a slow manner as they shared yet another kiss but with more gentility. "That was amazing." She whispered against his lips.

In that moment she had no regrets.

* * *

_wow, chapter 30! in the beginning i had hoped to stop at around chapter 30, but that definitely isn't the case. they finally hooked up in this scene &amp; it will lead to drama and something good. i hope you guys review and tell me how the 30 chapters have been so far and how i can improve in the story. btw they take another major step in the relationship soon enough. thanks for still reading! xx._


	31. Spring Break: Part IV

Her eyes opened when the sunlight him them directly.

She instantly felt a sting in her head as if she had been hit with a hammer—hangovers were the worst. She had only experienced them twice beforehand, but this one was the worst.

Her body felt weak as she slowly sat up and realized she was naked, which wasn't unusual. But something felt wrong, or different. She glanced over at Adam who was snoring in his sleep. It soon hit her that they were intimate last night but it was hazy.

"Ugh." Becky rubbed her temples as she tried her best to think. Her eyes closed as she remembered. "Oh my god." Her eyes instantly opened and she glanced down at her body, feeling ashamed.

No way.

There was no way she would have had sex for the first time while being drunk. She needed reassurance and quickly shook Adam awake, calling out his name. "Adam. Adam… Adam!"

His baby blue eyes were now visible and he looked exhausted as he too felt a throbbing pain. Unlike his girlfriend, he had woken up hung over before but he would never get use to the feeling.

It took him a few seconds to process the expression she had with been hard to decipher. She looked disappointed, upset and yet angry. "What?"

"Did we have sex?" Her voice was shaking when she asked him and his expression went from confused to thrilled.

"I, um, I think we did?" Adam had blurry pictures in his head but he was almost certain they did finally do the deed. There was a vivid image in his head of her body as he entered her. Now he was certain. "Yes."

Becky didn't know what to do. They were supposed to wait until marriage.

"No. No, how could we even do that? We weren't supposed to do that." She go out of bed and was on the verge of tears as she tried her best to change trying to avoid the pain in her head.

Adam followed her out of bed as he noticed how distressed she was. To him, it was okay they did this—it was going to happen sooner or later.

She shoved him when he moved closer to her, "No. Don't touch me. Do not touch me right now."

"Becky, calm do—"

"No." She had nothing else to say as she exited the room after dressing into whatever clothes she found.

The loud and quick stomping of her feet brought attention from a few of their friends that were awake downstairs. Leslie spoke up but could tell something was wrong as Becky left the house so quickly all you could see was a blur.

What the hell did Adam do?

::

"We were drunk and he took advantage of it. I wanted to stick to my vow and now it's over and done with. I didn't want it to be this way." Becky was venting to Leslie and Christina on the boardwalk.

It had a been hours since she had walked away from Adam and she had ventured out on her own until her two closest friends found her eating by herself. Adam had gone looking for her but to no avail.

No one in the house knew what had occurred as Adam didn't explain the situation; he just locked himself in the room.

"Becky, we all know Adam wouldn't force himself onto you." Christina commented. She loved Becky to death but the fact she was trying to blame Adam completely didn't go with her. "Again, you were both drunk and when you drink it brings out your true feelings and desires."

Leslie added, "And everyone knows how much sexual tension you and Adam have for one another. I'm surprised you both lasted as long as you did—I thought it would happen sooner."

The blonde made a face of disapproval at what she had just said. Sure she did crave Adam in that sense but she had committed to waiting until marriage. "It just wasn't supposed to happen this way. I can barely remember a thing."

Her friends gave her a face of sympathy as they explained how they lost their virginities.

"We did it in the back of a car before he took me home." Leslie explained. It was freshmen year and she was in a heist to lose it as quick as possible.

"And I lost it to someone who cheated on me just a few days before."

Becky had a sad expression as she had no idea this actually occurred to people. "Point is when you lose it, you lose it. There's no point of dwelling, Becks. And it was with someone you were with for _so _long. You just need to talk it out."

"It's just he doesn't talk. I-" Becky paused as she was afraid to admit why she was so upset to begin with. "You're right. I just need to talk it out."

They finished eating together and soon headed back to the beach house. They spotted Alex, Rico, and Brian hosting a BBQ in front of the house. Her eyes glanced around as she looked for her baby blue eyed boyfriend, but found him nowhere insight.

Adam sat in the room, looking at the floor. He felt like such a screw up. She had trusted him to keep control and resist the urge to go that far but he couldn't even do that.

What terrified him is that this could possibly be a risk to their relationship. Their whole relationship had been built on the instant trust they shared with one another and now she probably lost any form of that. This is the one thing she wanted—to stay abstinent—but now that wasn't possible.

He was wiping at his eye when the door opened.

"Becky." He sat up straighter as he wanted to approach her, but he was scared to as the last thing she said before she left was she didn't want to be touched.

That stung.

She said nothing as she moved to sit in front of the dresser, sitting on the ground. She sighed and Adam stared at her as he waited for her to talk but she didn't speak up at all.

"Becks, I'm so sorry. I wasn't thinking and it was stupid of me that I couldn't keep my control in check. I know you wanted to wait and I-"

"Stop." Becky halted his words and his mouth shut. Her demeanor scared him as she had never seen her so calm and yet so angry at once. He didn't know what to do or say. "You know why I'm really upset about this?"

Her legs crossed and she rested her hands on top of them as she waited for any response; getting none. "You never talk."

Adam looked bewildered and furrowed his brows, "Wha-"

"You never talk about the future. It's only what we will do tonight or tomorrow. Never once have I heard I want to marry you, I want to have kids with you, I want to grow old with you… I know you're not one to think that far along, but at one point I want to hear those words."

Why did this matter to the situation at hand was all Adam wanted to know. "I want to stay abstinent because I wanted sex with the man I married but I don't even know if it was going to be you as you have never brought up the idea. We've been together since high school—it's been, I don't know, almost five years—and it's never come out of your mouth. That's why I'm upset."

He rubbed the back of his neck and felt like his insides were being pulled apart. He loved her and of course wanted to marry her but he never thought about it. He wasn't one to think that far along into the future as he always went with the flow—but Becky wasn't like that. She liked having everything planned and to have ideas for the future.

"I want to marry. I want to travel. I want kids. I want a family." She admitted and those words felt foreign coming out of her mouth, as they had never been discussed with him. "And all you want to know is what I'm making for dinner."

There were tears in her eyes even if her voice was dry of emotion. Their eyes finally met and he felt like he had failed. He had ultimately failed as her best friend, boyfriend, and lover.

* * *

_usually i post 2 chapters buttttt i feel like making y'all wait for the next one lol. xx_


	32. What Do You Say?

The atmosphere in the house felt different.

There was tension between Adam and Becky and the friends could tell. They weren't around each other constantly and would only interact if the group of friends were together.

Becky of course covered up her sadness with happiness; acting as if she wasn't hurt by the conversation she had with Adam. Even after admitting how she felt about it and how she wanted him to open up about the future, he didn't. His mouth remained shut and all he did was apologize.

No claim that he wanted to marry her or have kids with her. As if the relationship had no future purpose. It was so difficult for him to even think of the future that when they were applying for colleges in high school, he never told her that he would be staying in Canada until the end of their last year.

She was aggravated then. It wasn't until a month was left of their summer together that he had admitted to her that he did want them to stay together during college. She was still upset but let it go, as she would easily forgive him.

Not this time around. They would be graduating in a little over a year and their future was approaching. She wouldn't let him leave it until they graduated for him to claim he wanted to live together.

As sad as she was, she played it happy.

Adam did the same as he tried his best to cover up his emotions. He was disappointed in himself. There was always toughness to discussing the future, as he never had plans. The only thing he had ever planned out so far ahead was the surgeries to transition. Most were out of the way and only one remained in which he was almost certain he wouldn't go through with.

He understood why Becky was upset and instead of handling it, he avoided it.

There was only one more night before they went back to school. He hated how they avoided each other the remainder of the break and how he had to sleep on the couch. He hated how when he tried to touch her in the simplest manner, she would pull away.

The night they were supposed to treasure and remember forever was tainted. Who knew so much drama came with losing their virginity.

::

He sat near the fountain, as he would always wait at during this time of day.

His second class was up and they always met at this time. But he wasn't sure if she would show. She continued to ignore him and hadn't stopped by his apartment since they got back to school.

It had been a week and no progress was made. She would answer some of his texts when she wanted to but nothing else. Leslie had told her that Becky had been going out every night and this concerned him as she always focused on her studies.

Twenty minutes gone by and she still wasn't with him. He rasped his knuckles against the cement of the fountain as he felt all this rage and pain hit him at once. She was pissed but this didn't give her the right to straight out ignore him.

She can't avoid him forever.

He sat for a few more minutes before he left on his skateboard to his apartment. From there he would drive to her house.

::

Becky was heading home from school and felt stressed.

Extra work had been given to her and she had so much to begin with as she had been slacking. Adam continued to be on her mind, as she didn't know where they stood. Avoidance was all she could do, as she didn't know what to say to him.

As soon as she parked she saw the figure of someone sitting in front of her house- Adam.

"Oh, man." She spoke to herself and sat for almost a minute before exiting the car. Adam looked deep into thought as she approached, and yet he didn't take his eyes off her.

"Are you going to say hi?" Adam spoke up and she sighed, staying silent. "Guess not."

"Look." Adam crossed his arms after standing, as he seemed to have her full attention. "I fucking love you, Becky. I tell you this all the time and I hope you still believe it."

"We had sex while drunk, okay whatever. I remember it and it was amazing." Adam noticed her eyes drifted to the door behind him, knowing he should keep his voice down. "Point is we did it. I don't regret it. Heck, I would do it again."

"Adam, you aren't helping yourself." She kept a poker face and readjusted her bag on her shoulder. "Where are you going with this?"

He bit his lip and nodded, "Point is I would do it again because it felt right the first time. The situation could of been different but it wasn't and maybe that's how it was meant to be. That's how I see things; things happen for a reason when they happen."

Becky sighed as it hit her once more that they way they viewed some things clashed from time to time, "I didn't want for it to happen like that."

"I know you didn't, baby, but we can't take it back. Maybe it happened because we needed to open up about the future- I needed to open up about the future. I suck when it comes to things like that but that's what you love, right?" He smiled at her and let his arms fall, reaching for her hand. "That I don't make plans. That I just live."

She smiled as well; she did love how he was so impulsive and so free-willed, unlike her. She let her fingers brush against his and needed more of his touch.

"And I love to live as long as it's with you by my side. I want to take you everywhere. I want to travel with you and learn new languages. I want to have kids with you as soon as you want them. I want a wedding. I don't care in what order we do that. Hell, we'll have kids, travel, then marry if that's what you want."

"Adam.." Becky started but he kept on talking.

"Becky Baker, I love you to the moon and back. I need nothing but your love to live and that's why I want you forever. I want you to be mine for the rest of my life..."

He got down on one knee and Becky went wide-eyed. Was he really doing this? She felt butterflies swarm all over her stomach and her heart began to race as he fished out a ring from his pocket. "Adam..." She repeated and felt herself come to tears as he looked up at her with so much affection.

"Will you marry me?"


	33. Happiness

"Come here."

Adam smiled as he pulled his love closer to his body. He lied on his side and felt empty if there were any space between them.

She giggled and moved to lie on her side as well; Adam wasted no time to press her close.

"What made you propose?" Becky asked with a smile as he was still on cloud nine.

It had been a few hours since they had left her home and gone to his. They told no one about the proposal yet as they directly went to his room and celebrated. There was no true conversation exchanged between them until now.

It had surprised her that he had done this but she didn't hesitate to say yes. "It felt right… I knew you were upset after we had sex because it brought up so much we had yet to discuss. But I realized I never really spoke about because I just thought you knew I wanted to spend the future with you." He grinned and kissed her bottom lip. "And there was no question in my mind that I needed to propose—I wanted to propose. It feels so right."

Becky felt tears began to form from the joy his words were making her feel. Never had she thought of becoming engaged during college or to even have a relationship like this for as long as it's been. "I love you so much, Adam." She held his face as she kissed his lips several times.

Adam pulled her on top of him after she did this and he grinned up at her when she adjusted her legs on either side of his body. "I will _never_ get tired of this view." His lust for her surged as his eyes focused on her body.

"Good, because now you're stuck with me." She tapped on her engagement ring and a wide smile spread across his face. On the trip there, Adam had explained that it was his grandmother's engagement ring. Drew had used it first when he proposed to Bianca but seeing as Drew was nowhere near proposing again, Audra let him have it.

She had given it to him during the winter break when she scolded him to treat Becky in the best way possible. "I'm so happy you said yes." Adam added as he slowly began to sit up.

"Why wouldn't I say yes?" She perked an eyebrow and looked into his eyes, now they were face to face. He remained silent as he continued to stare at her—she knew why he had doubts.

"Sweetie, I love you." Her fingertips ran along his cheek to feel the very soft hairs that never seemed to grow. "You're the only man I love and will ever love. As for what we did. I just wish it had gone differently, ya know? That I could remember every detail and that I wasn't drunk. I don't regret it, I just wish some things were different."

He wrapped his arm around her and leaned down to plant little kisses along her collarbone. "We have other chances to sort of re-do it, in a sense." He mumbled against her neck, "Like right now?"

Becky leaned back just a bit in order to get him to look at her. "Adam. It won't be happening again until we're married."

A frown formed on his lips from disappointment. Now that it had occurred once he was excited for them to have sex again. "Fine."

"If you're not happy with that decision, then too bad." She began to shift off him, feeling a slight discomfort as they didn't seem on the same page; again.

"Noo, come back here." He grinned and pulled her on him once more. They embraced again and Adam reassured her he was happy.

He really was happy.

::

Rico walked out his room and raised his eyebrows as he saw Becky in nothing but a t-shirt cooking.

The school year was almost up and in all that time that's passed he's always stunned by how gorgeous she is.

"Morning." Becky greeted him with a smile as she finished scrambling the eggs. She was making breakfast for all the three boys that lived in the apartment.

Over the summer, Adam's house was packed with all guys and only Audra and her as the girls. She was use to all the testosterone. She felt comfortable enough to lounge around in barely anything as they too roamed the apartment with nothing on.

"Good morning to you. Thanks for preparing breakfast, again." Rico smirked and set up the table, as he knew Adam would join them soon along with Brian.

"She's the only one who can really cook around here." Adam chimed in as he appeared from his bedroom in nothing but gym shorts. "Hi, baby." He gave his girlfriend a kiss on the lips.

Rico shook his head with amusement. They woke up next to one another and yet Adam perks up as if he hadn't seen her for weeks. Rico understood in a sense, as he knew they hit a rough patch during the break. Adam never opened up about it but they seemed to be past it.

"I love you." Adam whispered to her, as his arms were tight around her. She placed her hands on his shoulders and blushed from just the way he was looking at her.

She leaned against him and felt such a warm tingle in her stomach.

"PDA!" Brian shouted out. He was always the second most chipper in the morning, right behind Becky.

Both Brian and Rico sat at the table, devouring the breakfast food.

"I'm allowed to smooch with my fiancée." Becky grinned as she casually sat down at the table, Adam following behind.

They looked at her wide-eyed and then to Adam. She showed her ring and Brian squealed along with Becky. "Oh my god! You're engaged! Congratulations!" He was so excited for them and instantly brought them both in for a hug.

Rico followed the same gesture and was happy for them as well.

"My condoms are beneath my bed, buddy." Rico winked with a smirk.

* * *

_wow you guys replied with so many comments with the last time i updated! hehe, someone said they wanted me to post 3 chapters this week &amp;&amp; maybe if i do get a few more reviews ill do that since i did make you guys wait so long heh. tell me in the reviews what you thought about the surprise engagement, told you guys something big happening. thanks so much xx_


	34. Telling the Parents

"They are going to kill me."

Adam paced in front of the door. They were at Becky's house as they planned a dinner in order for him to announce they were engaged.

"I should of came to ask for his blessing first or her blessing or Luke's blessing! That's what you usually do, right?" He rambled on and Becky reached for him, "oh god, they think we're just doing this to have sex or they'll think you're pregnant. Oh my god. We need to go."

Becky stayed in place and held his hips, "My Hershey kiss, and come heeeere." She pleaded and he smiled at his pet name. "Look, they would probably assume that but we'll explain. We're engaged and that's that." She found her fingers playing with a button on his shirt.

He let out a deep breathe and nodded. It had been a month since he proposed and all their friends at school knew. They were yet to tell her parents and his. He was excited but freaking out as her parents were traditional and would have liked for him to purpose after they graduated.

"You're cute when you're freaking out." She was oddly calm and she was amused at his actions. She brought him in for a kiss to calm him down and melted against his sweet lips-hence the pet name.

"And if they disapprove, we'll run away together." Adam chuckled and nodded once more.

::

The dinner table fell silent as Becky announced the engagement.

The only one to congratulate them was Luke, as he had gotten use to seeing Adam constantly. After all these years, he held no resentment to him as he saw how happy Adam made Becky.

"Mom? Dad?" Becky looks at them both and can tell they aren't that happy.

Mr. Baker wasn't ecstatic as he hoped Becky would break up with the boy eventually. They were a year away from graduating and he still couldn't accept the person Becky had chosen to be with—spend her whole life with. To him the surgeries just covered up the gender Adam was born to be. It wasn't natural.

"Oh, honey. I'm happy for you… It's just you're still in school." Mrs. Baker started. Unlike her husband, Adam had grown onto her. They weren't close in any form but she accepted she couldn't do anything about whom her daughter decided to date. And Adam seemed like a perfect fit for her in a sense.

"We're going to get married in a few years, not now." Adam explained and this got a curious look from Becky as she expected for them to marry right after college. "It's an early engagement. It felt right."

"It would have been right for you to seek my approval first. That's what's right." Mr. Baker finally spoke up and took a casual sip from his lemonade. "Or even come to Luke for approval; No man doesn't seek out the approval of the father or brother first hand."

Adam stiffened up and Becky reached for his hand under the table as she spoke out to her father, "You would of said no anyways, dad. It happened in the moment and-"

"In the moment? So anything you two decide to do in future plans will just happen in the moment? What about when it comes to kids? Will that just happen in the moment, too?"

By that point Adam had excused himself from the table and walked out the front door. It was overwhelming. He was right—doing things in the moment was a ridiculous way to live. Especially now, he was doubting himself.

He soon felt a hand on his shoulder as Becky stood beside him, "It's okay. We both know he was going to be like this. I love you and that's all that matters." She smoothed down his plaid shirt as it had become wrinkled.

"I should of came to him first—he's right."

"If you came to him first, he would of turned you down and you would of felt bad proposing afterwards." She was right. "You follow your gut, Adam. Don't ever change that no matter what anyone says."

She gently pressed her lips against his jaw then his neck when she leaned into him.

"We need to talk about this getting married in a few years, though..."

::

"Oh, sweetheart! Congratulations!" Audra hugged her son so tightly.

She was so happy that he had finally proposed to Becky. She had an idea that he had done so as she had that feeling he was keeping a secret. "You too, future daughter in law. Come here." She embraced Becky as well with a smile.

Becky became overwhelmed, as her parents didn't express this much joy when she announced it to them. She brushed her tears away quickly once Audra had pulled away.

They had just arrived in Toronto and were at the airport. Adam couldn't hold the news and Becky was sporting the engagement ring, so he revealed the two month secret to his mother.

He yet to tell his dad, wanted to tell him in person. Hopefully Drew hadn't spilled the beans to him already. His friends from high school and college were aware to the engagement, as he had posted a picture of Becky holding a burger with the engagement ring visible; _my two favorite things_ he captioned it.

"What did your parents say?" They were now in the car on the way to the house.

"They weren't super happy about it…" Becky started and Adam intervened, "Her dad was pissed!"

"Adam!" Both the woman said at once. He smirked noticing the similarities in the two most important women in his life—both passionate, striving and could easily scare him.

"Tell me, how did he propose?"

Now Becky was gleeful telling the story in detail about the fight, not explaining why they fought, all the way to the way they told their friends.

They arrived quickly to the house as it was near the airport.

Adam felt something was off when he stepped inside the house, "I have a surprise for you." His mother told him.

Heading to the kitchen, he saw someone looking through the refrigerator. They looked at one another and Adam found himself looking into the same color eyes as his.

His mother had kept a secret of her own—she was dating his birth father.

* * *

_wow so many reviews yet again! thanks guys. heres the 3rd chapter for this week since i felt generous since its the last week of classes for me! finals coming up though, i'm not sure when i will get time to update next week.  
but guys i've set up a goal that i want to reach 100 reviews before i reach the 40th chapter! help me do this and i'll post twice in one week whenever we get the 100th review hehe. only 26 more reviews to go. xx_


	35. Home Sweet Home?

"Well how you've grown, son."

Luis just stared at the young adult in front of him. He had tried so hard to contact his son but Adam wouldn't have it. There was an instance where he had picked up the phone but the conversation lasted a minute.

"Don't call me that." Adam was pissed off. How could his mother not tell him that he was in the house? The man that had abandoned them was back in the picture and with his mother? "You shouldn't even be here!"

Audra stepped between them and turned to Adam, "Honey, don't talk to him like that. He's here for us." Luis had taken a part of her divorce with Omar. She had always spoken to Luis since Adam was age 10. She kept him aware of Adam's life but didn't let him into their lives.

But she found herself falling for him all over again like she did in high school. They were in love again, which is why she let them into the house and to see their son. She wasn't expecting Adam to be happy about it but she would hope they would get along.

"For us? He left us as soon as I was born, which was twenty years ago! He can't just waltz in here like this!"

Becky had only walked into the house as she was taking out the last bags and heard her fiancée yelling; which was rare. She settled her bags down, as she was concerned since he would need to be really upset to express such anger.

"Adam..." She approached them and saw a stranger standing next to Audra. The man looked like an older version of Adam as he was tall, thin, and light skinned—only that he had blonde hair. "Uh, hi."

Luis raised his eyebrows as he saw the tall, blonde comforting his son. She reached for his hand and placed one on his chest, easily spotting the gem on her finger. "Aren't you going to introduce me? Luis stared at his son.

The look he gave his father could kill. "I can't be here right now." He mumbled and sped out the door with a confused Becky behind him.

::

"Who was that man?"

Becky had stayed quiet the whole ride to McDonalds. They soon went to the abandoned church and were parked and eating on the hood of the car. Adam was still tense and wouldn't speak.

"Adam, who was that?" She moved to stand in front of him.

"My birth father."

She was taken aback and soon understood why he was so furious. Adam didn't speak of him much but from what he did tell her, she knew that he had abandoned Audra as soon as she got pregnant. They were in high school, and he was afraid.

"What is he doing here?" Her hands were on his thighs, rubbing them gently, and he shuddered as he explained that it was the person his mom was dating. No wonder she kept it secret to who it was.

"It's so fucked. Why would she do that to me?" Adam looked at Becky that made her heart sting. The happiness and joy of coming home was gone and replaced with sadness and confusion. She didn't know what else to do but bring his head to her chest, letting him find comfort in her as he always did.

::

It was the next day and Adam was happy he didn't run into Luis.

No one was home besides Becky and him and it felt relaxing, as they were never alone in the morning. When he awoke, no one was on his bedside and he felt incomplete without a morning kiss.

After brushing his teeth, he went downstairs and smiled at Becky singing along to some of her favorite tunes. "Music is the devils noise." He grinned and gave her butt a gentle slap.

She jumped just a bit and grinned, "Good morning to you, too." She set down her whisk as she was making batter and faced him, happy that he was in a lighter mood.

As long as his father didn't make him happy, she didn't want him around. She understood Audra could love the man but Adam seemed to hate him.

"Very splendid morning since we had a very fun time in bed last night." He leaned down to kiss her lips ever so briefly.

"I had no idea you could moan that loudly." Becky smirked at him and ran her fingers along the waistband of his boxers.

They had slept in the basement, as it wasn't occupied by anyone now as only his mother lived in the house. Drew stayed with his dad in an apartment during the summer. Since the basement is a long shot from hearing distance from his mom's room, Adam was very vocal last night.

There was this sense of freedom that was liberating-even at his apartment in Florida he couldn't be too loud as his roommates were near by.

They shared another kiss before she focused on mixing the batter once more. "Thank you." Adam embraced her from behind.

"For what?" She asked in confusion as he planted a kiss on her neck.

"For being there for me when I need you. For being my rock." He closed his eyes as he settled his head on her shoulder. His hands were beneath the t-shirt she wore. "There isn't anything I can do or get through with you by my side."

Becky felt heart warmed and rubbed his forearm. It never ceased to amaze her how much this boy loved her.

::

"You gave her nana's ring?"

Drew looked at Adam once they had settled at the table out in the park. They had bought sandwiches at a gas station and were having lunch, as they haven't seen each other since New Years.

"Yeah, you aren't getting married anytime soon."

"Shush, Adam, don't say that." Becky lightly smacked his arm before looking at her future brother in law, "Have you met anyone special yet?"

"Noo, but it was fun just messing around in college. I'll miss it." Drew grinned and felt saddened that his college adventure had ended.

He graduated early May and unfortunately Adam and Becky couldn't make it as they were still in school. Now he was moving back to Toronto and had found a job through connections from his dad. He hoped soon enough that he would make enough money to get an apartment of his own.

"I don't know how you guys don't get tired of each other. I had one girl and moved on to the next one." Becky made a face at Drew's words. "I'm just asking."

"How's dad?" Adam bit at a mango slice whilst asking, deciding to change the subject. Since the divorce, he hadn't spoken to him as much. They were both so busy and he was yet to see him.

The blonde watched as the Torres brothers talked about their parents. Omar was keeping busy with work and was trying his best to move on. Becky took a good look at both of them and remembered how surprised she was in high school to learn they were brothers.

Their looks contrasted the others as Drew was tan and bulky and Adam was pale and thin. Their personalities were also very different but they did share stuff in common-as their interest in women, sports, and parties.

It was obvious but Drew's earlier question that they enjoyed living life differently. Drew embraced the freedom and hated to be tied down, while Adam had been tied down since high school. Drew was a far more extreme partier than Adam would ever be as he was a huge frat guy.

But they both share similarities, as they liked the whole "Live life without regrets" as they both were adventurous and never regretted a thing they've done.

She couldn't help but reach up to rub the back of his neck in the middle of his conversation. He looked so concentrated and cute that she just desired to pull him in for a kiss.

"How's it going with the whole dad thing?" Drew looked at him concerned. The first night he had arrived, Adam texted him to tell the news.

It took all his control to keep him from visiting Audra. That man caused Adam pain and the fact she could be so selfish bothered him. "He shouldn't even be with her! He's a piece of shit!"

Adam sighed and looked towards Becky before reaching out to hold her hand. "Maybe it won't last. I hope it doesn't."

"Guys."

The boys looked at Becky as she called them out, "She seems happy. Shouldn't that matter?"

Drew was quick to Adam's defense. "He's shit though. He left when she was pregnant and didn't bother to see Adam in so long. Now he dates her? He must want something!"

Adam stayed silent, as he no longer wanted to discuss it. He loved his mom but how could she do this to him?


	36. Fiancee Knows Best

Luis perked up as he saw Adam walking in with his girlfriend-fiancé-behind him. They didn't seem to notice him as they were in their own little world.

When Luis saw him for the first time yesterday, he wasn't surprised by Adam's dislike towards him. In all honesty, he knew he could have been a better father. Now he was with Audra again and wished to connect with his son.

He was proud of who he had become as he was an attractive young boy attending college, soon to graduate, and was engaged. He also held down a summer job and volunteered. How could someone not be proud of him?

"Son." Luis called out as he stood up before they could go to the basement.

Adam furrowed his brows at his presence, "what are you doing here? Mom's not here."

"She will be soon but I just wanted to talk for a bit."

Becky looked at both the men and was struck again by their similar resemblance. She then remembered she never truly introduced herself, "By the way, I'm Becky; his fiancée. It's nice to meet you."

He took her hand and smiled, "I'm Luis Roberts; nice to meet you as well. Audra has told me a lot about you."

The blonde smiled back and was going to say more before Adam stepped in. Knowing he didn't want for her to speak to him, she simply gave Adam a kiss on the cheek for waving to his father. She left them alone, as she knew that's what they needed.

"What do you want?"

"I just want to apologize, Adam, for not being there for you all your life." Luis kept space between and look at his son with genuine sadness, "I tried to reach out to you but you wouldn't have it. I've been keeping up with your life for the past decade through your mother."

Adam was now confused as he wasn't aware about this. Luis had tried to call him but Adam would never answer but he had no idea he was already getting the details for his mom.

"I'm aware of everything. The school transfers, the bullying, being transgendered, college, your girlfriend, everything. Not the details but the basics. I know because I care." He was trying to see if any of his words were getting to Adam but he couldn't tell. "I've been trying my best to support you even if you don't allow it."

"I don't allow it because you're not my dad! The man who was with my mother for 15 years is my dad not you!" He couldn't keep his voice down as he was boiling. Luis was just trying to make him feel bad for not giving him a chance-for not needing him. "I needed you when I was little. When I wanted to play hockey or when I wanted to learn how to roller-skate or even going to school for the first time. But you weren't there."

"And now you think you can make it up by showing up two decades later with dating my mother?"

Luis let him throw his verbal hits, as he knew it was true, "I couldn't do it, Adam I was so young and I was terrified so I left. I always loved your mother from the moment I set eyes on her. As much as I wanted to support you both I couldn't- you were better off without me in the picture."

"I don't care anymore. I'm in my early twenties and am going to have a wife soon. Whether you're in the picture is all up to my mom." Adam stated and began to step back.

"What would you have done in my situation, Adam?" The older man had his hands on his hips, a habit Adam had picked up from him. "Boys your age never stick around at a time like that."

Now he moved closer to his dad, "You have no right whatsoever to say that! You have NO idea who I am or how I treat my girlfriend or what we've been through. I do not need to explain my decisions and my life to some stranger. You can stick yourself in this house only because of my mother. You make her happy for some fucking reason and that's the only reason I'm even going to tolerate your presence."

"Don't speak to me like that," Luis looked into the eyes of his son, "you can't dis-"

"I can do whatever I want to do! You were no fucking father so you have no fucking authority over me. You are _nothing_ to me."

And with those words Adam was gone-leaving Luis speechless in the living room.

::

"He has the nerve to talk to me like that!"

Adam was venting to Becky in the basement living room. She was watching him pace and soon glanced to the stairs in hopes Luis wouldn't come down the stairs.

"He wasn't in my life until now and he wants my respect? It's so stupid." He stood with his hands on his hips and soon let them drop in disgust once he remembered his father did the same. "And then he tries to justify why he left."

Becky speaks up and reaches for his hands once he sits on the table. "What he says?"

"Basically that he was too young to stick around and then he said I would have done the same?" That's what caused all the anger to rise out. "He doesn't even know either of us or our relationship."

She made a face of disapproval. That was out of line as Luis was a stranger to both of them. "I know you wouldn't leave me."

"I wouldn't! Not that it matters since we don't have sex. Bringing it back to the point that he doesn't know shit." Becky scooted just enough that her butt was almost off the couch, trying to get closer to him.

"Don't let him get to you. I know he makes you angry and this whole situation is screwed up but anger doesn't solve everything." They looked into each other's eyes as Adam looked for reassurance. "You can be angry. You can be mad, upset and furious but it doesn't lead to anything but more rage. You need to accept what's going on Adam. Not as your father but as your mother's boyfriend."

Becky was sure her words got through him as she watched his body loosen up and his shoulders slump. She planted a long kiss on his forehead, after he leaned forehead to rest his head on her shoulder.

He would follow her advice.

* * *

_wow you guys totes hit the 100 review mark quickly lol as promised i'll update twice this week so four chapters total! heres the first two and thanks again so much for all the sweet comments &amp;&amp; that you guys are enjoying the story. i have written up to chapter 55 now and we're on chapter 36 so i promise you my weekly updates will continue since i am prepared lol. thank you! xx_


	37. Reminiscing

"Mom, she's adorable. You should of let me bring her!"

Adam was talking about Flurry at the dinner table. It felt strange without his brother and stepfather there but was easing into it as a few weeks had gone by in the summer.

"You know I don't allow pets!" Audra looked across at the happy couple that held hands on the table as they ate-Becky was left handed, so they did this with ease.

"Neither do my parents, but they kept her for the summer." Becky added with a smile. They weren't happy that they had to watch a cat but didn't oppose as they fell for her as soon as they saw her.

Luis watched them interact as he sat beside his girlfriend. It felt foreign to him having a family dinner as the past decades he would eat alone. "We had a fish one time, don't you remember?"

Audra grinned at the thought, remembering Luis had won her a fish at the fair and they kept it for a while. "It was a goldfish."

Adam couldn't help but notice as his mother glowed with happiness. He still wasn't use to Luis being around because he just didn't want him around. He was okay with things like this but whenever Luis tried to connect with him, Adam would push away.

"You never even let Drew and I have fish. Dad was okay with it but you would always opposed." Adam smirked and he began to banter with his mother.

Luis felt an ache at the word "dad" escape Adam's lips and for a brief second thought he was going to call him by that. This boy was tough to crack.

"We've already decided that every one of our kids will have a pet of their own." Becky smiled bright with excitement as she began to stand up to collect the dishes.

Adam countered her actions by grabbing the dishes himself, "I'll get it." He smiled at Becky and cleaned up-even picking up his birth father's plates.

::

"I'm happy you're getting along with him."

They sat out on the curb of the park. They decided to have a small adventure, as Becky would leave for a few days for a Christian mission of some sort for the church she attended at Toronto during the summer.

"I'm not but I'm trying." Adam sipped picked a French fry off the skateboard. He was enjoying a midnight snack. "On a lighter note, I'm enjoying this date."

Becky giggled and reached for a fry of her own, "I am too. I don't think this relationship would last longer than the summer though, just to let you know." She bit her fry with a proud grin from making her boyfriend laugh.

His laugh was so intoxicating and it brought joy to her heart. He was a tough one to crack when it came to laughter but her jokes always made him burst into huge fits of laughter. "I bet I can change your mind with a kiss." Adam smiled as they both leaned in to share an innocent kiss that resembled their first.

They barely pulled away as their noses brushed against each other. "I can never get enough of you. You still give me those butterflies and those goose bumps, how's that even possible?"

"Because you love me, silly." Becky smiled wide and placed a hand on the back of his neck, twirling his hair in her fingers.

"I do, so so much. From the moment you smiled at me, I was a goner."

"I seem to recall you were upset that I took your clothes before you burned them."

He smirked and looked into her eyes as he collected the first memory of seeing her, "You were passing out sheets for your play audition and you looked at me while you were talking. You kinda just brushed me off, but I liked the challenge."

She felt heart warmed that he did fall for her the moment he saw her, "You never told me this."

"Because you ignored my presence and didn't even remember that occurred did you?" She shook her head and he chuckled, "Exactly... You were this new girl from Florida and you imitated me as soon as you stated your opinions. But again I loved the challenge."

"You were soooooo hot, that caught my attention too." Becky smacked his chest as he purposely ruined the sweetness in his speech. "I only go for the hotties and you were the major hottie- You still are."

She laughed at his shallow reasoning to pursue her, "And I thought you were cute. You caught my eye at the party, obviously. I was dancing with this hockey friend of my brothers."

"Tyler, yeah."

"Yeah." She hid a smile as she was amused by the slight jealousy in his voice, "And you were with Alli. I assumed you were taken so I didn't bother."

"Well at least you pursued me instead of my brother. Drew found you hot too and I was like nope, she's mine." Adam couldn't help but smile at the memories.

Becky looked surprised and perplexed at the mere thought of even going out with Drew. He was a jock and a player in high school; she would have never pursued even if she had no interest in Adam. "I am yours. Now and forever."

Adam felt joy at the words. He had gotten the girl he always dreamed of.


	38. Phone Sex

Adam lied in bed wide-awake.

Becky was on her retreat so he was alone for the night, which was so weird to him. They had shared a bed for the majority of the past year so he felt empty.

And horny.

They were always very intimate at least every other night and it had been a few days since her departure. A thought came into his head and he grinned.

_"Hey babe."_

Becky's phone vibrated and smiled as she saw whom it was. She was also in bed with a girl she was sharing a tent with.

They were helping out in cleaning the area since it had become polluted. She enjoyed it as she felt so much satisfaction for helped the earth. The day was long but she found herself rolling around in bed in hopes she wouldn't accidentally spoon into her friend in bed.

_"What are you doing up? :D?"_

_"I can ask you the same thing."_

_"It's cold and you aren't here."_ Becky laid on her stomach as she lazily texted him.

Adam smiled and continued the conversation for just a bit before he drifted. _"I crave you."_

Becky raised both her brows and glanced back at the sleeping girl. She felt out of place doing this through texts but was curious to where it would lead.

Her phone vibrated again under her fingers and an image of his body appeared. He was in nothing but boxers and the way he placed the camera let her see downwards from his point of view.

She couldn't resist saving the picture and sighed softly, _"Wish I could send you a picture, I'm in the dark, outside, Adam."_

Groaning to himself as Adam had forgotten she wasn't indoors so even getting a picture from her was slim. _"You're killing me here, Becks."_

_"I'm sorry, hubby."_ She grinned at the word hubby as she was still hit by this astonishment that she was engaged.

_"It's ok. I just miss you, not just your body :( I wanna kiss yoooooooou."_

She couldn't help but tease him, _"Says the guy who was so close to sending me nudes!"_

_"If you want nudes I'll give you them ;) Just know they're nudes coming from the heart."_

Another vibration was felt when he send a picture of his hand gripping himself through his boxers. She felt flustered and turned into her back. _"Adam, someone is next to me! ."_

_"Well don't let them see me then, it's only for your eyes to see."_ Adam felt enduring as they never did this before and wanted to continue even if she couldn't reciprocate.

Becky felt anxious, as he didn't answer her texts briefly, she wondered if he had fallen asleep last minute and was to plug her phone in but another picture came through.

_"Your boob picture totally helped me out here."_

She caught her breath as he had sent a picture of his erection, having taken off his boxers. She had never felt so lustful as she did now. Adam had always driven her desires crazy but with him not even close to her, how was she to satisfy her cravings?

_"You're driving me bonkers, Adam •-•"_

Adam smirked at the text and groaned as he stroked his hardness, "Fuck." How he wished it were her rubbing him but his own hand had to do. He had forgotten to reply to his fiancée and read her next text.

_"I want to see all of you."_

His mouth gaped at the words. She was into it and he was smug- now he knew for sure that she craved his body as much as he craved hers.

Becky resisted the urge to touch herself as Adam somehow managed to take a picture of him masturbating. The look on his face as he was so focused and the way his veins popped on his hand made her desire skyrocket.

He then took a video of his hand moving up and down his member and Becky could hear him moan her name out. The video was short, which made the situation worse.

She loved the feeling of saving the earth a step at a time but that couldn't compare to the feeling she got when she sees Adam moaning with her very eyes.

::

The three-day retreat had spread out to a full week and at that point both Becky and Adam were backed up for release.

Adam waited at the church where Becky would be dropped off and he held some roses, as it was a tradition for him to give her flowers after not seeing each other.

There were a few people there waiting as well and when he saw the bus approach he stood up. The blonde got off the bus, stretching her legs as she had been sitting on the bus for hours.

She smiled when she had arms tight around her frame and for a second regretted that she had not brought the vanilla body lotion Adam adored.

"God, I missed you." He planted kiss all over her face before settling on her lips, "You smell like grass."

Becky blushed at his comment and was going to apologize but saw the look of admiration on his face and decided it was a form of compliment.

"Are these for me?"

"Oh yeah, definitely." She took ahold of the flowers and smelled them. Oh, how she adored roses. "Red roses for my wifey."

::

His kisses were soft on her sore arms. His hands felt so cold yet relaxing on her sides.

He was massaging her body after such a long week of psychical labor.

"Let's go to Hawaii."

His words made her eyes open and she glanced up at him with a grin, thinking it was some sort of joke, "And Antarctica too?"

Adam chuckled and placed his face close to hers as he stopped his hands in order to get her to focus on his words, "I'm serious. We can start crossing the locations off our list." They had made a physical list of all the places they wanted to see.

"We can go for a few weeks and celebrate our engagement. I have money left over from the surgery." He was set for one surgery this summer and was excited.

She was now on her stomach as she looked up at him with a smile, "Really? But what about your volunteer work?"

"Screw it. We both need a break. Let's go."

He was set on this and she knew it. He was so impulsive and sudden but she loved it. It was adventurous and how she wanted to go.

"Let's do it then, Adam."


	39. Start of the End

Adam groaned as he rested in his bed.

They were back at school and he had just finished his long drive back as Becky and him decided to drive. It was a road trip and they had enjoyed it.

Overall, the summer was great. The Hawaii trip had been fantastic and something to always remember. It felt like a honeymoon before marriage. Afterwards, they had done nothing but enjoy the summer like any teen would: parties, picnics, concerts, sleeping, and etc.

They had yet to plan any sort of thing for the wedding but he was in no rush as he was just living in the moment. He loved his girlfriend to death and she loved him.

The whole dilemma with his birth dad and his mom was still in the works as they were still together. He had left with the same expression of his father. He didn't want to be involved with him in any way and it would stick like that.

Surgery had gone well and he was officially done with his transition. There was an optional surgery, which was to renovate his equipment in his pants, but he was fine with how it was. He was satisfied with his growth.

Finally, the road trip was memorable, as they had stopped wherever they pleased. They had even stopped on the side of the road to make out in the back seat. They were just living and he was having the time of his life.

::

"Becky, why are you worrying about this now?"

Adam was practicing a skate move on campus after hours. It was a Tuesday and they had no work planned so decided to enjoy the warm October air.

"What do you mean why? Adam, I want to wed right after college?"

Becky crossed her legs as she watched him focused more on his board than on her.

"Why? I thought we would marry, like, a year after college for time."

"No, we have time now to plan. We could marry in June on your family's cottage, as we always planned." She smiled at the thought of her in a wedding gown and Adam in a tuxedo. "Or after you have your next surgery."

Adam grimaced at her words at how soon she wanted to wed and to the fact she hadn't let her know he wouldn't go through with the last surgery, "About that, I'm not going to do it." He looked up at her just for a second before looking at the board, focusing on his feet.

Becky was confused, as she had thought he was going to. It was his last step, "How come? It's the last one before you are officially a man."

Those words made him stop in his mid movement, "What do you mean?"

"What? It's the last surgery you need, Adam. Last one in your transition so you can be the man you always wanted to be."

She was unaware to how the wording stung him. Wasn't he enough man to her? "Wait, so what do you see me as now?"

The blonde noticed his shift in attitude and shrugged, "Adam, I'm just saying you're a step away. Why not do it?"

"Because I don't want to, doesn't that matter?" He furrowed his brows and picked up his board. She stood up and stood in front of him.

"I guess but don't you want to be fully male?"

That was it and Adam pushed away, "What the fuck do you mean fully male? Aren't I man enough?" He was making a scene and caught the attention of the few students on the campus during that time.

Becky was astonished at his words and reached out towards him, only to be pushed away.

"Don't."

It was as if he could move as fast as light when he was skating away from her. What did she do wrong?

::

"I'm not man enough, apparently! Wow, I guess I need a fucking eight inch to be a man."

Brian went wide-eyed at the words falling out of Adam's mouth. He had come in with a slam to the door and was surprised to not see Becky.

"Dude, what?"

Adam groaned at himself, having thought no one was home. He felt like yelling and crying at the words Becky had said. "Fully male." So what was he to her, some sort of in between?

"Becky, just... I don't know." He plopped down on the couch with his head in his hands.

As if on cue, the blonde walked in, "Where's Adam?" She didn't greet Brian, as she knew she had to see Adam. She must have said something that cut him deep without her knowing.

Adam looked back to see her standing there, "Get out. I don't want you here."

The tall blonde felt her heart race. He had never kicked her out before and the look he was giving her was so raw yet emotionless.

"Adam, come on.." Brian added. The look of pain on her face made him feel bad. They were both his friends, which made the situation worse.

"Baby, just-"

"I said get out." He was out of his seat and walked towards his room without another word.

::

Becky sat in her room, playing with her engagement ring.

Her fiancée had never been that upset with her in so long. The last time was when she stated that abortion should be banned as no form of life should be killed-later he explained why he thought it shouldn't be banned and she couldn't help but agree in some aspects but she stayed with her opinion.

There were at times where she could be so oblivious to the actions going on around the world all the way to the simple way she spoke at times.

She held her phone in her hand, waiting for a reply from her fiancée but it wasn't happening. There was this pain in her chest from the mere fact they were arguing. They hadn't fought in so long as they were always on good terms.

All she could do now is wait for him to answer. In the meantime, Becky thought it'd be best to do research on the surgery he was avoiding.

* * *

_hey, I'm so sorry for not being able to update sooner! I'm giving you guys 3 chapters as this past week has been hectic since it was the first week i was back home. i even got a job and quit a job within one week so now my schedule has eased up only a bit but i hope to work soon enough. just an fyi if my updates become less frequent as i become more busy during the summer! thanks. _


	40. Eight Inches

It was a routine for her to go by his apartment in the morning on Wednesdays. She had class early and he didn't, so she'd pop in for breakfast; knowing he'd be up to go jogging.

Adam awoke feeling down from their conversation. He knew he was in the wrong by pushing her away when they could just talk about it but it pained him to know he wasn't enough for her.

He heard footsteps approaching to his room and sighed, at this moment he hated the fact that he had given a key to both the apartment and his room.

The blonde's head peeked through the door and she was a sight for sore eyes. Adam had forgotten she had this job interview to go to, as it would be her gateway for a career in her major.

"I just came by to see you and make you breakfast. I'm gone if you want me to be."

"No, we need to talk." He sat up tiredly, having just woken up. She sat at his desk and faced him. She wanted to reach over to pat his hair down but resisted. "Am I not enough for you?"

Becky was caught off guard, "What? Why are you asking me this?"

"Because of what you said yesterday, that I'm not fully male." He spoke softly and slowly as if he spoke any faster he would have to face the fact that he wasn't enough, that she wasn't happy with what he had.

She then scooted over and let her hands rest on his thighs, "You are enough for me, Adam. You are my rugged, handsome, Canadian man who I'm so in love with."

Adam smiled softly at her words but still felt, as it weren't enough. "Then why did you say that?"

"Because I wasn't thinking. I just thought you wanted, needed, the surgery to feel like a complete man. I just thought it would make you happier by going through with it. I had no idea my wording was so wrong so I'm sorry." She now had her arms around his neck, "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too, for kicking you out."

"It's alright, just don't do that again." By the tone in her voice, he knew she was serious about that.

They shared a small kiss and she couldn't help but grin afterwards, "How could you think I didn't like your body? It's such a ridiculous question."

He shrugged and glanced away, "I just, and you seemed to be pushing me to get the surgery. As if you wanted me to be longer or something."

"Oh, no." Becky ran dragged her fingers down his chest, something she would do so often that Adam knew what she had in mind when she did that. "I remember making love that one time and distinctively remembering how much I enjoyed having you inside me."

Adam watched her as he noticed she was coming onto him, which was rare, but how he loved it. "Enough to let me make love to you again?" She didn't answer as she got on her knees in front of him.

"Oh, f-fuck."

::

"Looks like you don't need an eight inch!"

Rico laughed at his own joke as he saw the couple get out of Adam's room. Brian had told Rico what Adam had said when he was angry yesterday and he loved to tease him.

Adam made a face and Becky looked at them confused, "it's nothing." Adam reassured her.

"You're headed to campus, right?" Rico asked Becky as she went to the kitchen, looking for a snack. "Because I'm headed there now. We can walk together."

"I would love that! Let me just grab something."

Adam grinned as he watched her. Even after performing her oral skills on him, she was still beautifully intact.

"You look really beautiful, by the way." Adam commented after Rico left to wait for Becky. "You'll definitely get that job."

Becky gave him a closed smile as she was eating a banana, ironically. "I know I will. Now I can actually take you on dates." She poked at his chest.

"A perfect date for me is playing video games on that couch." He saw Flurry hop onto the kitchen counter and he picked her up, holding her close. "With this little girl, and you of course."

Becky giggles and leans over to peck his cheek. She lingers and waits for him to notice in order to kiss his lips deeply. Her fingers rested beneath his chin as the kiss deepened even further. It was the purr that came from their cat when they finally pulled away.

They exchanged smiles. "I love you." Becky kissed his jaw and headed for the door, "And Adam.."

Adam looked back towards her as she stood near the door, "You're more than enough for me." A grin formed on his face and found even more self-confidence.

She was gone in seconds and he already missed her.

::

Adam bobbed his head to the music as he walked to school.

He wasn't in the mood to skateboard and felt like a stroll would help him on what was on his mind-marriage. They would be graduating soon enough and the only reason they fought last time was because he wasn't in agreement of marriage right after graduating.

Now that he didn't want the surgery, the summer would be available for them to wed and just the thought scared him. They both had so much to juggle and having to squeeze in all the marriage things would require a lot of effort and concentration.

He wanted to make Becky happy but she was dreaming of making the wedding happen so quickly when it reality he knew it would have to wait.

It was scaring him, honestly. He was only 22 and he hadn't imagine wedding so early or to be even engaged so early. He was being a coward.

"Hello! Are you in there?" Courtney pulled out one of Adam's headphones and smirked at his sudden surprise, "I've been calling out for you!"

"Obviously I was ignoring you." Now he laughed at her expression, "Just things on my mind. How was your break? Any fights between Aunt Jenny and Uncle Pablo?"

Courtney smiled at the fact he remembered of her telling him about the divorce between her aunt and uncle. It was easy to talk to him and to her dismay she was getting feelings for him, that wouldn't be returned.

She knew he had a long-term girlfriend and as much as she respected that, there was only so much she could do. Because of this she failed to befriend Becky.

As they spoke, she took in his happy smile and the happiness in his eyes. She was making this happen by just talking to him, there was something there.

Adam grinned, "I want a tattoo, but I'll probably regret it after." They stood close to one another near the entrance of the main building. They had to split ways but he lingered. He had to admit, she was one hell of a girl.

Courtney was one of his closest friends, heck even a best friend-coming right after Becky and his high school best friends. She wasn't too bad on the eyes either. She was Italian, with wavy brown hair and green eyes.

Of course there was temptation but he would never admit this.

"Tattoo idea, get my face on your ass." Adam broke out in laughter as she backed away into the building. "Bye!"

There was a smile on his face as he watched her leave, oh god.

* * *

_hey guys! finally chapter 40, it's crazy. i hope you've enjoyed all the 40 past chapters because i can guarantee about 40 more to come sooner or later hehe. please review and tell me what you think. or any ideas you have for their remaining last year of college! i'm not sure whether i want to keep the story going past their graduation (so that might exclude the wedding and all that) but i'm not sure. want to here your opinions if i should include that. i also might want to write about their adult lives maybe when she's pregnant because that would be the most interesting. but again its up to you guys!_

_i have several ideas on what i can start writing now or if i should just wait until this story is done with. i just want to hear my readers opinions and desires when it comes to my stories! please don't be hesitant. thanks! xxx_


	41. July

"So, the wedding."

They were out on the beach as it was the weekend. Becky had prepared a sort of picnic and Adam was delighted at all her food choices: sandwiches, pudding, and soda.

"We should probably start planning that." Becky stretched her legs over his lap and pulled off her sunglasses. Adam kept them on in hopes that she wouldn't notice how much he didn't want to plan yet. "I was thinking July. You think that's enough time?"

Adam cleared his throat and looked at her, "Becks, don't you need that's just...bad timing?" He paused when he saw her began to look confused, "I just we're both so busy right now and planning is so time consuming. And I want a long term engagement, like marry at 25 or something?"

Becky was surprised at this yet again, having thought they had been on the same page but apparently they still weren't. "Why are we going to wait if we know it's going to happen?"

"Why rush if we know it's going to happen?" He argued.

She sighed, "I just want to be your wife as soon as I can. Holding it off is just unnecessary to me and a year of waiting is long term enough."

He grabbed a clump of sand and let it run through his fingers, "I just think it's too much to handle, Becky. We can't plan it right now and you know that."

"We can if we try." She was being so stubborn and he was giving in, "what's with you and waiting? Like even getting an apartment of our own bothers you too even thought I spent almost every night with you."

Adam felt like that was a low blow as he respected all her decisions, "That's like me asking you why we don't have sex even though we already did once." He pulled off his sunglasses and looked at her, "You're pushing me for this wedding to happen so quickly because you want it. I want to have sex with you but am I pushing you? No!"

"Because we shouldn't have had sex in the first place!" Becky started and rubbed her temple. This sweet picnic date was again focused on their relationship and their sex lives. "The sooner we get married the sooner we can have sex."

He cracked a smile at that fact, "Because bribing me with sex is totally going to work.. If you think that's the only reason I want to marry you, then obviously something's wrong."

Becky draped an arm over his neck and waited for them to make eye contact before she spoke. "You're my world, Adam. I care about what you want and all your opinions and I know for a fact you do want to marry me but something's holding you back.."

Silence. Only the waves could be heard and the slight quickening of her heart rate.

"Be honest with me, babe."

Adam bit his lip and decided to man up and be honest. "I'm just scared." He spoke so softly that only she could hear him. He seemed to pull her in even closer while continuing to talk. "What if we're going too fast? What if getting married so soon, or even engaged, ruins us? We've been fighting more than usual and seeing less of one another whenever we make a big step."

"Hey, that's only happened for other reasons besides being engaged. The surgery thing, your parents, your biological dad... That's all outside problems that we handled with one another by our sides. If we take that all out, we're happy." She smiles at him and runs a hand down his covered chest, "We mix well. We get each other and make each other happy. And the arguments will always happen, no matter what."

"That's is true."

Becky looked at her man with open affection and was happy with how he seemed more comfortable with the idea, "Marriage is the highest title of commitment, Adam. And honestly, I've already committed myself to you. You know that.." She nipped her lip with a blush.

"That is also true." He smirked and kissed her lips.

As scared as he was, he loved the girl beside him. There wasn't anything he wouldn't do to make her happy. "July it is then."


	42. Space

He threw the wrapper into the container of candy and sighed to himself while chewing on the tootsie roll.

It was Halloween and it was the first one where he didn't have energy to celebrate, not that he could. Becky's very opinionated views didn't support the thought of trick or treating. She saw it as the support of the devil.

Adam definitely opposed but he had no fight in him to convince her otherwise. Not like he had to as Becky wasn't even with him. She was out working late with her boss at an elementary school. So, Adam was alone for the night as his roommates went to celebrate in costumes and drinks.

The past two months had been hectic with trying to manage wedding plans, school, work and a pet. Adam couldn't help but pet Flurry who was near the bowl of candy. What added more stress is that he was looking for a job down in Florida as Adam agreed to stay in the state, he liked it here.

Becky could stick in the job she had so now all he had to do was find a job for him, but he hadn't had time for it. Currently, he worked at the school's radio station but that didn't pay.

Without a doubt, he was again trying to hold off with planning because it was driving him bonkers. Managing calculus and figuring out what bouquets to choose was unnecessary. It stressed him out and he was just feeling out of place-but he wouldn't let Becky know.

After they agreed to marry in the summer that followed, Becky had been gleeful! She enjoyed the planning and how occupied she was. Adam had no idea how she wouldn't get tired.

"Finally leaving work, want me to come by?"

Adam read the text and he sighed, "No, I'm sleeping soon."

Space. That's all he desired, and peace.

Sitting on the couch alone with his cat brought him that peace he desired the end of each day. A peace Becky hasn't been giving him lately.

::

"Becky, going to Canada for two days is going to be pointless."

They were having lunch outside on the lawn in front of the library.

Becky had brought up another future plan, which had to decide what they were to do during thanksgiving break. She was trying to convince him to visit Canada the beginning of the break and return the day before thanksgiving.

"Adam, we have to meet up with the planner. They can come up with the set up in the cabin."

Chewing on his burger as he thought made him lose his appetite. Becky noticed how he seemed rather distant lately and had no sense of opinion.

"Okay. I'll tell my mom to buy our tickets."

The blonde shook her head, "I can buy my own."

Again, he agreed. "Okay."

Silence consumed them as he played with his food and she focused on consuming her salad. "Have you found a job or any employers?" She was forced to look up when he didn't verbally answer and she saw him shake his head. "We still have time."

"Okay."

Becky wasn't thrown off by the simplicity in the conversation as it had become more and more frequent to have agreeable Adam. She knew he was stressed but there wasn't much she could do to help him. Even their intimacy had become less frequent.

"I don't work tonight, I can stay at your place."

Adam sipped his soda and seemed distracted as he clicked away on his phone. He made a small noise in agreement as the typing continued.

::

Becky was worried as she waited for a response from her fiancée.

She had been in his apartment for a few hours and Adam failed to show up.

"Maybe something came up." Rico suggested as he clicked away on his Xbox controller.

Brian sat next to Becky, watching Rico's focus be solely on the television. Everyone was there but Adam, even Flurry was situated next to the popcorn bowl.

"He would of at least made an effort to answer me." She rubbed her temples, as she grew more concerned.

Adam's second best friend stayed silent, as he knew better than to state his opinion. Brian knew Adam wasn't having the time of his life and enjoyed getting away from time to time. It's become more frequent for the boy to return the wee hours of the night and falling asleep on the couch.

He knew that was why Adam rarely had Becky over, as Brian knew Adam needed a break from everything that came with Becky. It seemed as if the engagement did more harm than good.

Suddenly the door clicked and everyone turned around, well except Rico, to look at Adam. He was bewildered as if everyone was waiting for him.

"What's for dinner?" Adam grinned as he set all his stuff down casually before walking into the kitchen, opening up the refrigerator.

"Your girlfriend made this killer chicken earlier, ate it all though." Rico smirked.

Becky got up and joined her hubby in the kitchen, "I can make you something."

Adam shook his head as he had ingredients out to make a sandwich, "I'm just going to eat this then go to bed." He moved around Becky to get silverware and Becky reached for him.

"Where were you? I was worried."

She tried to keep her voice hushed as the roommates were in the living room. Adam shrugged, making Becky's hand slip off his arm. "I was doing some studying with a few friends."

It wasn't till now that a stench hit her and she smelled her hand before smelling his shirt. "Why do you smell like smoke?" It was a weird smell that didn't seem to come from a cigarette.

"Like I said I was with some friends. People smoke, Becks."

Adam was becoming more defensive and she knew it was time to back off. She wished to have a decent conversation with him but it didn't seem to be happening tonight, "I guess I should go. You're tired anyways."

By then, his sandwich was ready. He grabbed a coke and nodded, "I'll see you later." There was a small smile on his mouth as he wished her goodbye and he merely walked past her.

No goodbye peck or kiss.

"Bye, boys!" She had picked up her stuff and waved at the boys around the television.

Another night spent alone, she thought to herself.


	43. White Lies

Becky was unlocking the door of Adam's apartment as she had come by to give him some news.

There was music blasting, which wasn't rare as Adam enjoyed his music.

Walking inside is what surprised her. Adam was with Rico and a few others and they all sat in the living room. It smelled of pot but Becky couldn't pick it out until she saw the bong being passed around.

What really caught her sight was Adam laughing for what seemed to be the first time in weeks. Who was making him laugh made her blood boil with paranoia.

Adam sat closely to Courtney and they were speaking among themselves. Becky had seen her before but Adam had told her how Courtney didn't want to be friends with Becky, for no real reason either.

It brought this ache to her and Adam hadn't even looked up until he heard a slam from the front door. No one had stepped in so some had to have stepped out.

Brian wasn't set to come for a few hours so it had to be Becky. "Fuck."

::

Adam's name continued to show up on her lock screen as he called numerous times. Becky knew he had finally noticed her presence once she was gone.

What even was more upsetting was how he hadn't called until an hour after she had left. He had no urgency to even talk to her.

They were going to leave for Canada in a week in order to plan for a wedding, for their future. She was planning a future with someone who didn't talk to her, kiss her, who preferred smoking weed than being intimate and who most likely was screwing someone else.

She cried to herself in her car once she was parked in front of her house. Becky silently cried, as it seemed to hit that the wedding could be a mistake. The engagement seemed to have brought a huge drift in their relationship.

It brought a huge gap in her heart, in her being, knowing Adam betrayed her in some way. She wasn't even sure if he was cheating but she was afraid to learn. She loved the boy with all her heart and it hurt to have no love returned to her.

The phone ringed for the fourth time and she finally decided to answer. "What?" Her voice sounded raspy and she wiped at her tears. "What can you possibly want?" She was snapping at him but she didn't care.

"Are you crying?" Even in this midst of sadness, it seemed to baffle her how easily he could pick up what she was doing or feeling. "Come back, let's talk."

Becky scoffed so loud she was sure the woman passing by her car could hear her, "Now you want to talk? I'm surprised there's anything in your vocabulary besides "okay."

"Listen, pl-."

"No, you listen. Don't talk to me, not like that would be an issue. I'll see you on the plane when we go to Canada because yes we have to go since there's no refunds available."

Adam was baffled on the other end. The weed still in his system, his reactions were delayed, "I'm sor-"

All he heard was the tone and he knew he had been hung up on. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He threw his phone to so hard to the wall it bounced off after leaving a dent.

"Dude, what the hell?" Rico had walked down the stairs when he heard shouting. "Dude?" He saw no one from where he was standing until he came closer to the kitchen when he saw Adam sitting on the ground, drinking a beer.

::

Shaking him was the only way to wake him up so that's what Brian was doing.

His friend was on the couch with beers around him for what seemed to be the third time this week. There was a bong on the ground as well which was just careless and out of Adam's nature as he knew Flurry would lick anything.

"Whaaaaat?" Adam mumbled and could smell his own breath. His head was pounding but he found numbness in the rest of his body from the continuous smoking he had been doing.

"You have to pack, bro. You leave after classes, remember?" Brian was prying the can from Adam's hand and sighed. "Becky called but I answered. She said she'll meet you in front since she has your passport."

At this point, Adam had slowly sat up and was rubbing his face. He instantly knew he would skip the classes in order to get himself prepared for the flight and to prepare some sort of explanation to his fiancée.

Brian sat on the table and was face to face with the pale boy. "What's up with you?"

Adam shrugged and licked his lips, feeling parched, as his throat seemed dry to the bone, "Relationship issues."

"Like what?"

Again, a shrug.

The silence from Adam did nothing but worry Brian more.

::

Adam checked the cracked screen of the phone to wait from some sort of text. He had arrived ten minutes ago at the airport and was waiting in front like Becky had said.

After hours of drinking water and trying to come up with an explanation for his actions, he hadn't come up with anything. Why was he so withdrawn from Becky? He had no fucking idea.

Of course he was still head over heels for her and the fact she had shown up when Courtney was there was just bad timing. Sure, Courtney had a crush on him but that was it. As for the marijuana, he needed a form to relax in which Becky was no longer giving him.

Beer was just a mix in the past days, as he just needed to forget about how terrible he's been. He wanted to apologize to his sweetheart but he respected her wishes of wanting to not speak until today.

There was finally a buzzing from his phone but it was from Luke, not Becky.

"I'm here." It read. What did he mean?

About three seconds later, Luke was besides him. "Guess we're having a trip to bond."

Luke smirked at the expression on his future brother in laws face. He hadn't expected Luke to be there and neither had Luke, honestly.

It was just yesterday that Becky approached him, begging for him to use the ticket instead so she wouldn't have to go. He agreed nonetheless as Becky had told him what Adam had done.

His intention was to knock some sense into the Canadian but Becky said being around each other was punishing enough, as they never really connected.

"O-Okay." Adam finally processed what was going on.

A grin was on Luke's face, "Becky said that's what you were going to say."


	44. Agree to Disagree

Adam took the chance to go to Becky's house as Luke was being driven back.

The trip to Canada was weird to say the least. Luke and him didn't exchange many words and they did their own thing until it was time to leave back to Florida.

Adam did as Becky was sought out to do by coming here, which was find an orientation of the wedding. It was hard as he didn't know what Becky would like and whenever he called she wouldn't pick up. All Adam was able to achieve was tailor his tuxedo. His mother bought him a new one she knew Becky would love, and Adam liked it as well.

Luis was there as well, admiring the fact his son was going to take the next step soon enough. Adam still didn't call him dad.

Sadly, Adam couldn't meet up with Drew since Drew had a trip to another city. At least he was able to catch up with Eli, who was back in Canada for his career as a writer.

It was something Adam needed. Being back home brought back a relief he needed that drugs and beer couldn't get him.

Now it was his turn to talk to Becky, something he had been failing to do for a while now.

::

Becky smiled as she saw her brother come back, "How was the trip?!" She hugged him tight and didn't notice the figure behind Luke until she pulled away.

The smile dropped so quickly Adam smirked at just how much Becky seemed to dislike him at the moment.

"He wouldn't take no as an answer." Luke explained. He had tried his best to get Adam to take a different ride but Adam said he would always end up going to Becky's. "He paid for gas."

The blonde rolled her eyes at how easily Luke gave in, unlike her.

"Becky..."

She looked at Adam for a brief second before walking upstairs. She knew he wouldn't follow, as he felt uncomfortable without the permission of her parents, which were both at work at the time being.

He contemplated whether to follow or not, "Screw it." He quickly went up and found Becky in her room. She was taken aback.

"No, get out."

"No." Adam asserted and locked the door before standing in front of it. "We need to talk."

"Now because you want to talk, I have to? That's not acceptable." Becky stood maybe two feet away from him as she was prepared to walk out if he moved.

"Then don't!" Adam exclaimed as he looked right into her eyes, "just listen, like I've been doing for the past month."

She remained silent as she crossed her arms. He took this as a sign to talk.

"Whatever you're thinking about that girl, you're wrong. We're friends, that's it." He visibly saw her softened but she failed to believe him. "Ask anyone, we're always in the living room or with someone. The only girl I'm ever alone with in privacy is you."

"Second...the weed. I'm sorry about that. I've been using for a while since I've been incredibly stressed with everything, Becks."

Becky furrowed her brows and felt frustration at how he thought that was a worthy excuse. "And I haven't?! I guess stress gives me the right to smoke too or maybe snort cocaine."

Adam frowned at how she failed to see the root of the problem, "I can't handle ever-"

"That doesn't give you an excuse, Ad-"

"You stress me out! Okay? You're the root of my problem is that you stress me the fuck out!" Adam's voice had elevated and Becky had jumped.

"Why would-"

"Let me talk, oh my god." He was frustrated as this point and rubbing his face. There was a pause as Becky watched him crawl back into that hollow shell of an Adam. At this point he had moved away from the door, "Never mind, I'll just go."

"Don't, I'll let you talk."

Adam exhaled and stepped closer to her, "I have so much on my plate and I can't deal with it, Becky. I'm not you, you enjoy this; the full schedule, never having to stop, never needing a break. I don't I need a break to play my game or read a comic or skateboard. I've had no chance to do so since the start of the year. You've been on me about the wedding and the job and school. I don't need a mom. I have one in Canada."

"I was trying to be helpful." Becky felt slightly hurt at how he could find her pushing less than helpful. "I thought you had time to do all that stuff."

He shook his head, "I don't even have the energy to be intimate with you. We haven't had any form of sex in almost two months."

"We don't have sex." She corrected him.

"Whatever you call it, I don't have energy. Everything is driving me crazy and I thought I could handle it when I agreed on the beach but I can't."

Adam stepped back and rubbed the back of his neck. He finally took in Becky's expression, which made him realize he hurt her by blaming her. "I'm sorry." Becky now seemed more focused as he was finally apologizing. "For yelling and blaming you. That's not fair."

Becky stayed quiet and perked a brow when Adam kept staring at her, expecting her to talk. "Now I can talk?" Adam nodded. "I know you're stressed but pushing me away isn't your answer. I'm on you about everything because I need it to be done."

"Well, I clearly can't handle it... Maybe we should change the wedding day." Adam whispered his last statement, as he was scared for what she would say. She was set on having it in the summer.

"We agreed to the summer, Adam."

He was shocked at how she didn't seem to sympathize with him. He was breaking apart in front of her and all she was worried about was the wedding date staying in place. "Wow..." Adam paused and felt himself grow emotional at the lack of understanding Becky was showing, "As long as you get your wedding date, you're willing to let me crumble."

Becky bit her lip as she noticed the strain in his voice and how his jaw clenched, something he would do to hold himself back from crying. "Adam..." She reached out to caress his cheek but he took two steps back before she could.

"I don't want to get married anymore."

With that, Adam left the room before letting Becky have a final word.

* * *

_thanks for the reviews and comments! the next few chapters are going to be a little rocky. i'll try to update weekly as best as i can. _

_and antinomian: honestly the bottom surgery was discussed a few chapters ago but again its up to the reader if they want to assume he's had surgery or not. i have read that it isn't possible for certain actions to be done without the bottom surgery but this is a story so i just do as i please lol i do try to keep it realistic as possible but going into depth of his surgeries and such is something I'm not very aware of and try to avoid because of my lack of knowledge._


	45. Thanksgiving Dinner III

This was awkward.

It was Thanksgiving Day and Becky and Adam played the part of happy engaged couple as they sat down at dinner with her family.

Adam played the part better than Becky ever could as lying for her was tough. It felt so real, Becky had hope Adam had changed his mind but every now and then he would mumble how he wanted to leave.

"You can't. Not until everyone leaves." Becky whispered into his ear and felt the desire to kiss his earlobe. To the ones at the table, it appeared to be affection. If only it were real—it was something she craved for months now.

Adam did the same to her, "That won't be for hours." He mumbled. He was suffering as he continued to sit there with a fake smile on his face. His eyes glanced to all her family members and connected with Becky's father. The pastor still resented the fact they were engaged and Adam knew how happy he would be once he learned about the end of their engagement. In all the past years, he had yet to receive respect from Becky's father and he knew in his bones that would never happen.

And yet here he was sitting at the thanksgiving dinner with the rest of the family—who did respect him. Becky's aunts and uncles, along with cousins, were okay with his situation especially because he made Becky happy. It also didn't hurt that they weren't as conservative as Becky's parents.

As he was in his own head, he had failed to see Becky had pulled away and was focusing on her food. It had only been a day since his outburst of wanting to cancel the wedding. Becky had felt numb, as she didn't know whether that meant the end of the relationship as well. Canceling a wedding means all hope is gone, to her anyways.

She cried for hours after he had left and didn't know whom to reach for console. Definitely not her parents as she knew they would be gleeful that their was a change of plans. Not her friends because she would feel bad for making them have to choose a side. Not her brother as he would be too protective.

The only person she desired and could talk to be next to her but he barely spoke to her this whole day.

Adam shifted in his seat as he felt Becky's eyes on him. The rough patch they hit made him very uncomfortable, a point he's never reached with Becky. They always spoke about their problems but not at the moment. An argument always led to resolution or to sexual pleasures, or both.

Glancing under the table, his eyes roamed and he held back. This wasn't right. They were on the verge of breaking up at a family dinner and all he could think about was what's under her dress. The shift had went from Becky's father's disapproval to Becky's legs.

"Excuse me." Adam softly said to the people around him before he stood up and walked away from the dinner table. He walked inside as they were feasting outside and he heard footsteps behind him. "Becky-"

"Come with me." Becky grabbed his hand and led them up the stairs with Adam dragging his feet. "Adam, we don't need an argument right now." She tried to remain calm.

"What do we need then, Becky?" Adam stepped closer to her and looked lost as he waited for an answer. "I don't know how to fix this... Or what to say, I just know I need you."

Becky frowned as again she took in his sad expression, "Come here." She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought him into an embrace. He was so warm and smelled so well. "I need you too, no matter what."

Adam let her hold him for a minute before pulling away just enough to look at her face, "Remember how when we broke up last time?" He paused when she looked at him confused but she nodded, "I pleasured you then we finally talked. Maybe that's what we need."

"Whoa, Adam..." Becky backed away, "Being angry at one another doesn't mean I want you like that."

"It's been two months, Becky. Even if we can't have a decent conversation doesn't mean I don't want to ravish you on that bed right now." Adam glanced to her neat bed and grinned. "We've never done anything in your room before."

Becky smiled small and shook her head, "You're nuts! My family is downstairs."

"Just means we have to be quiet." He approached her and placed his hands on her thighs. They looked into one another's eyes before sharing a kiss after what seemed to be centuries.

Adam kissed softly and enjoyed the taste on honey or her lips, making him smile. "New chapstick?"

The blonde giggled against his lips, "Been using it for a while."

"Haven't kissed you this way for a while." He wittedly answered as he reached to lock the doorknob. She unbuttoned his shirt hesitantly but she didn't finish as he led them to the bed.

Becky gazed up at him before they kissed more passionately, their teeth accidentally colliding in the process. "You've lost your touch." They felt at ease doing this, a form of peace they haven't had for a while.

Adam chuckled as she felt her hands unbuckling his belt; "We're really going to do this with your parents downstairs?" He glanced down as her hands pulled out his belt.

"There's a time for everything, right?" Becky felt bold as now he was pushing up her dress in order to find a handle on her panties. She felt excited to have his lips on her, his fingers inside her. "You initiated this by the way."

"Don't you think for a second I regret it." Adam quickly pulled away at her panties, not wanting to waste time as they were expected for dinner soon. "Just remember to be quiet."

He leaned down for another kiss as he pressed himself between her legs. Becky's hand pushed down at his khakis and boxers, finally revealing him. "Oh." Becky sighed as he felt Adam stroke himself against her folds. "Adam, don't d-do that."

"Why not?" He breathed out against her mouth as his hips continued to move. "Are you afraid you'll beg for me to be inside you? That I'll slip inside you and you won't regret the feeling of me pounding you?"

Becky looked into his eyes and bit his bottom lip in return, eliciting a moan from him. She placed her hands on his sides and digs her nails when she felt his tip rub against her clit. "This is the most talking you've done in weeks."

Adam let out a small chuckle in the midst of a moan and smiled, "Talking dirty comes easy to me." His voice was getting breathless, as he grew hard against her. "Still haven't answered my question, baby."

"You know the answer, Adam." They spoke in whispers and he stopped his hip movement. "D-Don't, come on." She smacked his ass lightly with a grin and Adam shook his head.

Looking into each other's eyes, Becky knew what he wanted. Maybe this was the time to finally do it, but with their clothes still on and her family downstairs it wasn't perfect.

But it still didn't feel right to her. It wasn't the place or the time to have sex especially since the first time, and only time, they've ever had sex they were drunk. Now he wants to do it again but with them in the middle of a hurdle in their relationship. She definitely knows this isn't the time.

"Adam, stop." Becky stated more strongly and pushed at his shoulders as he continued to try to kiss her and distract her from his movements down below. "Stop!" She almost yelled, as he didn't want to listen.

Seeing this side of him was scaring him, as he had never been forceful before. Adam rolled off her and knew he had gone a little too far but with everything they're going through he had hoped doing this would bring things to light; to make himself want to commit to her again.

Becky wouldn't meet his eyes as she leaned down to pick up her panties and quickly putting them on. "You need to leave. I'll tell my family something came up."

He reached out to touch her after he had buttoned up his pants, "Bab-"

"Don't you touch me!" Becky practically yelled at him. This brought him big déjà vu at how the same words were said to him after hooking up for the first time during spring break. It didn't hurt any less than it did the first time.

She was still shaken from what had just occurred and didn't feel comfortable around him in any sense.

"You need to leave."

* * *

_thanks for all the reviews guys! hope you enjoy this chapter as well hehe_


	46. Time for Change

"Becks."

Adam smiled small at his girlfriend. It had been just a day without seeing one another.

A few hours ago he texted Becky to meet him at the beach, and surprisingly she had agreed. It was a Saturday night but it being the fall, it wasn't too packed. It was chilly but warm, making it a perfect temperature for beers.

Becky sighed when noticing the beer in his hand, "Promise me you aren't drunk?"

She was still thinking back to the night a few days back and couldn't keep it out of her head. It scared her how Adam thought sex could possibly help out their relationship when truthfully it couldn't. It probably would of just made everything worse.

"I'm not, this is my first." He gives her another smile and she decides to sit. He reaches over her lap to grab her a Capri Sun, also giving him an excuse to get closer to her. "Here"

"Thanks." Becky says just above a whisper and Adam doesn't tear his gaze away. She had obviously scooted away from him and he wasn't taken aback. He deserved to see this cold side of Becky after what he did to her. "Bring any weed too? I don't see a bong anywhere."

Adam exhales loudly. "I'll never do that around you." He messes with the beer can in his hands and finds it unsettling to take a sip, finally deciding to set it down. "Are you mad about that?"

"The fact you smoked weed? Sort of, it kills brain cells, Adam!" Becky began to scold and sat up straighter as she noticed him leaning closer to her. "But I understand why you used it, not that I'm happy about it. Drinking, drugs and sex aren't the solution to everything."

His blue eyes look at the horizon as she continues to speak, "I'm sorry about that. I didn't mean for it to get that far and I'-"

"But you did. Now I don't even want to be around you." Becky admitted in a whisper.

Slowly, he reaches for her hand but again she pulls away. "Why aren't you respecting my boundaries?!" Taken aback yet again as he tries to touch her when she clearly doesn't want it. "

His jaw tenses and he of course reaches for the beer again. Their relationship is beyond a point of return and it's quiet for a few seconds until she speaks up. "I think we need a break."

This captures his attention and he looks at her with a sadden expression, "Becks, we're engaged."

"Thank god we aren't married yet then." Her cold tone brought goose bumps to his skin. It's like she didn't even care about how they handled their relationship in the past.

"You're willing to stop the marriage just because I wanted to have sex with you? It wasn't because I was stressed or emotionally drained or no longer feeling it? Just because I forced myself on you _once _you're deciding to end everything?"

Becky couldn't even take his viewing on what was happening and how arrogant he was being. So she decided to agree, "Yes, because I'm that much of a heartless bitch I only care about my feelings."

She hastily stood up and began to walk away no longer wanting to be around him. But she could hear him following all the way to her car.

"Becky."

"What do you want, Adam?" He remained silent as they just looked at one another. Taking him in was rather disappointing. He had a beer in hand and it was obvious by the bags under his eyes that he hadn't slept. It was almost as if looking at Adam's evil twin. She was no longer seeing the strong Adam she loved but another side of him she couldn't handle.

Adam gulped as he watched her get into her car and not look back as she drove away.

::

It was as if she was looking at another version of Becky.

Christina remembered how Becky had acted when Adam and her had broken up exactly two years ago. Becky then had been crying every day and would struggle to get out of bed. She would consume herself in schoolwork or attach herself to Will and her friends.

But Becky now was acting as she normally does and it was throwing Christina off. It had probably been two hours since Becky had gotten back from the beach and came to visit her on campus to talk about what happened.

She was thrown off by hearing how Adam had pushed himself on her and how that had led to possibly the end to their relationship.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

Becky crossed her legs, as she got comfortable eating her salad. She merely shrugged as she poured dressing over the lettuce. "He wasn't happy and I feel like I don't know him anymore. Being with him kept me from being okay."

The brunette furrowed her brows, "It's been like eight months that you've been planning the wedding and now you're just going to stop?"

The blonde did have to admit that was one of the things holding her back from breaking up with Adam but she had a nagging in the back of her head that this wouldn't be permanent.

"I still love him. I know this is what we need right now—this is what he needs."

Becky knew Adam would never break up with her because he truly loves her with all his being but she knew it was something that needed to be done. They needed to know how it felt to not be with one another and this was the only way of doing it.

::

"Looks like I'm coming up for Christmas."

Adam sighed as he video chatted with his brother.

He had just finished summing up what had occurred and Drew knew better than to take his calm demeanor to heart. Adam was crying underneath the surface and Drew knew in time he would try to get back with Becky.

"Man, with both of you you'll be back together in a week."

"I don't count on it. I really screwed up this time."

Drew smirked, "Now you have to tell mom the wedding is on hold. Just imagine how much smack you're going to get from her."

Adam chuckled, "Becky's parents are probably celebrating."

* * *

_hehe. thanks for all the reviews! can you guys believe i was actually tempted to leave the story like this? i was contemplating making this the last and final chapter of this story because it would leave a huge mystery as to how they got back together, if they ever did._

_but then i changed my mind, because i feel like it wouldn't be complete. the story will continue! xx_


	47. Get-Over-Her Party

A week had gone by with no contact.

Honestly, Becky was handling it better than expected as Adam was struggling. He was glad it was the weekend so he could get an excuse to live it up.

Since they would be heading off to break in a week, Adam decided to throw a party at his own place. Brian and Rico weren't against it, as they needed a break before studying would occur for final exams.

"Think you'll hook up with anyone?" Rico grinned at Adam as they rolled in beer kegs.

Brian made a face as he sat in the living room, having heard Rico's question. "Why would you want to hook up with anyone?"

"Maybe because it was sort of the reason they broke up."

Adam smiled, as he was amused at how they bickered about him right in front of him. "I don't know. Even if I wanted to its weird to think about."

Brian nodded in agreement, "You were with the same girl for almost five years. Only Becky has seen your penis."

"And me!" Rico spoke up and they all laughed. That run in had been awkward. Becky and Adam knew from then on that their activities would remain behind closed doors. "Doesn't mean no one else has interest."

"Yeah, Courtney's been eyeing you since last year."

Adam bit his lip at the thought. He couldn't deny the attraction he had to her because she was stunning.

"She's my friend, dude. Even if it did happen, wouldn't it get awkward?" Adam rummaged through the pantry to take out the chips they had bought earlier.

Brian chuckled at how forgetful Adam could be, "Did you happen to repress what Rico and I did for months?"

"Oh." Adam shrugged, having forgotten that both his roommates had hooked up several times. Brian had somehow managed to get frat boy Rico into men. "Still she's like my best friend."

"Who wants to bang you."

"And who you want to bang."

Adam bit his chip. "Doesn't mean anything."

"It means I should lend you a condom. She's coming over."

::

"I can't believe she showed up."

Alex stood next to Adam as they stood near his bedroom.

The party was just cranking up as it's been a few hours. It was loud as could be and there were already drunks lounging around in the living room. Adam had been smoking when Alex came up to him to let him know Becky had walked into the apartment with Christina and Leslie.

"Why would she show up?" Alex continued to question and just received a shrug from his friend. "You know I'm not on any of your sides, but I'm more your side than anything."

This made Adam laugh and he thanked him. It was nice to have friends that weren't both his and Becky's. Only Alex and Courtney knew of the break up who were only Adam's friends. He couldn't go in to much detail with Courtney because he knew how she felt about him.

"Did you see Courtney though? She looks smokin'."

Courtney had arrived early since she helped out with arranging the party. She was wearing a black dress with stockings. There was no denying she looked hot.

"I guess so." Adam admitted.

He heard a faint heel clicking from the stairs and hoped it wasn't Courtney. When they both noticed the blonde coming up the stairs, Adam tensed.

"Adam."

Alex looked between them and felt awkward as he could tell Becky wanted privacy. He scurried down the stairs.

"You look nice." Adam smiled at her as he took in her simple attire that wasn't quite fit for a party. "What are you doing here?"

Becky knew he would be hesitant on talking with her but they had to speak about what they would be doing over break. "I just wanted to know if you were going to handle all the wedding stuff back in Toronto." She kept her voice steady and calm, which has been her attitude for the past week.

It was only once that she felt the urge to cry but she held back knowing Adam didn't deserve to be cried for. It still hurt thinking about him pushing himself on her and wanting to use her but she knew he hurt from her breaking it off.

"That's all you wanted to talk to me about?" It was off putting that whenever they did speak it was about the wedding. Not about their day or school or something as simple as a movie. Their relationship had shifted far from their lovey dovey stage to a place of robotic action and questions. "Since this wedding is still off I need the ring back."

Becky fidgeted with her hands as her fingers ran over her bare ring finger. She had removed it a few days back and it felt foreign to no longer have it on her.

Guessing from her silence, he knew it would be something she would hesitate on. "How can you dump me in less than a minute but when it comes to your ring you can't even talk?"

"Because it's _my_ ring. You gave it to me."

"Yeah because I was a fucking idiot." Adam was being harsh, something he would blame on the alcohol and weed later. Becky wouldn't even go near him as she immediately assumed he was high. "I can't believe I thought that I had to marry you because we had sex. If that's the reasoning I should of proposed like two years ago."

She felt herself struggling with keeping her emotions in check as he demeaned their relationship to nothing other but physical. "It's sad to see you like this." She finally felt the courage to step towards him, leaving little space between them.

This caught Adam's attention since she isn't one for physical contact during an argument. But this was his shot. One of his only chances to state his feelings, "I love you, Becky."

"I know you do but we need this." Becky took no time to answer. She gripped his arms and sighed as she looked into his eyes, "Separation makes the heart grow fonder... Do whatever you need to do until you realize why you loved me in the first place."

Becky couldn't help but caress his cheeks and run her hands down to her usual spot on his neck. For a brief second she wanted to kiss him but she knew better.

She had to move and walk away until he was ready.


	48. An Actual Drunk Hookup

Courtney had her eyes on him since the beginning and now that he was a single man she had a chance.

When he told her about the break up, she supported him 100% because he was her best friend and someone she connected to in many ways. Adam knew she would comfort him and she did. She also knew a party would help, and it was.

Adam was laughing as he played beer pong with Courtney on his team.

"You talk a big game but you honestly suck." Courtney laughed as she watched him fail yet again at aiming the ball in the cup.

"Like you're any better?" Adam challenged.

Rico hit a ball right in the cup, breaking Courtney and Adam out of their flirtatious charade. "One of you assholes has to drink now!"

Courtney flicked Rico off as she picked up the cup and swallowed the beverage. "Easy peasy."

"That's what you call a partner!" Adam tossed his arm over Courtney's shoulders. Courtney had a higher tolerance than Adam ever had with alcohol, which was surprisingly as she was as petite as Becky.

"Let's see if I can win us this game." Courtney aimed for the final cup on Rico and Alex's side and hit it perfectly. "Ayy!"

Rico chugged the drink in shame and Adam chuckled. He felt on top of the world, as he was dazed from so much being consumed. He reached for another beer as he settled on the couch where a group was playing the dirty truth or dare game.

"I'm so down for this." Adam grinned, as he was never able to play since half of the things on it were sexual.

Courtney joined him on the couch, sitting next to him, as it was the only seat open. Adam smiled at her as they both decided to join in.

It was a few rounds later that Adam found himself being leaded to his bedroom with Courtney. She had landed on "Take the hottest person in the room to the bedroom and do whatever you please." Of course she chose Adam.

"We don't have to do anything, ya know?" Courtney smirked at him as she settled on his bed as he stood in front of her. She glanced around the room, as she had never been in there before. "Just have to be here long enough to think we did something."

Adam felt conflicted as he watched her. The words "do whatever you want" rang in his head as Becky had just mentioned them a few hours before.

"Court..." He started off and moved to sit beside her. "I can't deny that I find you extremely appealing." Courtney grinned as she crossed her legs, placing her hands on her knee. "But I know you like me in a way that I can't return. Even though I'm single and can do whatever I want, I don't want to make this awkward."

She smiled at him in amusement at how sincere he was being and how worried he was about their friendship. "I know how to keep myself in check. Ever heard of friends with benefits?"

He laughed as he realized he was making this a bigger thing than needed. "I'm sorry, just I like having you as a friend. But also doesn't mean I'm attracted to you."

"Well I like that you're straight forward about this." Her green eyes looked into his blue ones and she reached over to move his hair away from his eyes, something she always tends to do. "I won't get hurt, babe. I know what you want and I'll give it to you."

Courtney was extremely confident and knew what she wanted and what she needed. Of course, hook ups weren't frequent but she did have them before. She wasn't much of a relationship person so this opportunity with Adam was something she would grasp.

His eyes watched as she pushed down her dress straps and let the dress drop. Adam's eyes drifted to her chest that was bigger than Becky's and they were bare as she didn't wear a bra.

She shifted onto him as she straddled his lap and caressed his face in her hands, "Are you sure you want to do this?"

Adam contemplated for a minute as he took in the fact someone else besides Becky was on top of him. He was engaged just a week ago and now one of his best friends was almost naked on his bed. It was a huge shift in his life but it was a risk he would take.

"I'm sure."

::

Waking up next to Courtney gave him a weird feeling.

He barely focused on the fact that he had a terrible hangover since he was still mind blown that he had sex with someone other than Becky. But he was yet to have sex sober.

Adam didn't even regret having relations with Courtney. He felt it was right at the right time and she knew what she was doing.

Leaning down to kiss her shoulder was just enough to wake her up, "hey." He mumbled as she blinked repeatedly to try to wake up. "We smell like shit."

That made Courtney laugh. "It's all you. I never smell bad." She sat up and kept the blanket wrapped around her chest. She didn't know how to react to this morning after as she usually left right after a hook up but he was a friend; a friend who knew how to please. "Even with foul odor, you surprised me last night."

"Really now?"

"Yes, really." She smacked his arm as she realized he was grinning from ear to ear. "I wouldn't be opposed to do it again..."

Adam's expression changed from a grin to one of surprise, "it wasn't just a one time thing?"

She shrugged, "whatever we decide to do, we're still friends. We're still studying today, right?"

"Of course, babe."

::

"Yo." Christina smiled at Adam as she joined him at the table outside the café. "You're not waiting for someone are you?"

She wanted to talk to him since she hasn't seen him in over a week. She had only had a glimpse of him at the party she went to yesterday with Becky. It was as if their friendship had ended along with the relationship with Becky. Of course that wasn't the case because he was a dear friend to her.

"Nah, just waiting for Courtney. We have to study for these killer exams coming up." Adam sipped his lemonade with a grin. "How you've been?"

Christina reached over for one of his fries and took a small bite of it. "Just dealing an emotionless Becky Baker. What happened with you two?"

Adam rose a brow with a small smile as she tried to play coy about the break up, "Always digging for the deets, aren't you?" He took a pause as she waited for him to continue, "I wasn't happy and I guess she knew that so she took it in her own hands to help me. That's just what she does."

"Is that why you're not trying to get her back?"

His mouth opened to speak but by that time Courtney approached the table, "Hey guys, feels tense over here." She eyed Christina and Adam, wondering if Adam had budged and told her about the hook up between them.

"Everything's tense around here before finals."

Christina looks between them both and felt like something was going on by the way Adam wouldn't meet Courtney's eyes. Something was up and she was determined to figure it out.

* * *

_hehe thought i would treat you guys with two chapters! i probably won't update in a while since i am posting two chapters at once. as for what happened in this chapter... let me know how you feel about adam hooking up with someone else who isn't becky !_

_thanks for all the lovely reviews &amp;&amp; check out my other story "Undeniable" if you're interested. thats when beckdam is in high school! xx_


	49. Shame on You

"This is why we had that pact."

Adam mumbled to his partner to help end the awkward silence. The small smile Becky gave him made him realize they might actually have a chance at finishing this project they never started.

They were in English, the second class they've ever had together.

"Well we couldn't see into the future, could we?" Becky countered as she watched him. She pushed her hair back as she read over the few objectives of the project they had left to do. Adam watched with curious eyes as it had been days that they had been so close to each other.

The pact they made was a promise they wouldn't team up during class for any assignment, unless it was truly necessary. This way they wouldn't let their schoolwork interfere with their relationship. Together, they had made the exception for this assignment, as it would be easier since they needed to work on it a lot after school hours.

She took in his features as he focused on his laptop. Becky had heard from friends that his drinking had minimized slightly but he still looked so tired. "Are you okay?" She asked softly in a whisper.

His jaw clenched, Becky taking notice of this. He wanted to tell her how he missed her and how he knew he screwed up badly. He wanted to take her back home and have the conversation needed to get her back, but it didn't feel right.

Keeping his answer short and simple, "I'm fine."

With his eyes glued on the screen, Becky knew he was far from fine.

::

"Sorry, this is just new to me."

Adam chuckled awkwardly and Courtney turned her head back to smile at him. "It's fine... I'm here to teach, aren't I?"

"Guess so, you've been a great teacher so far." Adam smirked and pressed his bare body against her back. His hands gripped on her sides as he kissed her. Courtney was on her knees, gripping the headboard, and faced the wall.

He was struggling to find the right angle to penetrate and right placing of his legs.

"Don't over think, babe. Just ease your way to it." She advised as his hands wandered while he adjusted his lower half. "O-Oh, or do that." She sighed as he fingers stroke her clit. He had the perfect pace whenever it came to his hands-she would gladly assume it was from his experience with Becky.

Adam smirked as he kissed her neck. This is the second time he's decided to hook up with her, and oddly it was after another encounter with Becky. Courtney gave him the distraction he needed by letting him fuck her. He did feel this sense of guilt afterwards as he knew he was using one of his best friends but he couldn't help himself.

"Fuck, is that good?" Adam breathed out against her shoulder. It was undeniable he was inexperienced when it came to sex, but Courtney had no problem with it. She found it almost relieving, as if she can finally have someone who isn't so selfish in bed.

"Mm- yeah, but my knees are hurting."

He chuckled as he moved away and let her move onto her back. It always hit him how imperfect sex could be. There's continuous cramps or pain from being on your hands or knees too much. There's sometimes boredom from being on your back way too much. There's always a mess when orgasm is hit.

Whenever it hit him, he felt another sense of guilt that it wasn't Becky he was experiencing this with. Courtney knew what to do but it was always fun and exciting to try new things with Becky.

The brunette looked up at him and knew he was in his own head again. It wasn't surprising, as it always seemed to occur, which is why she had preferred having her back towards him. She knew her in gut what he was thinking but she kept ignoring it as she hoped it not be true he was thinking of another woman.

What caught his attention is when she gripped his penis, making him moan. They shared a sloppy kiss as he situated himself between her legs and she gasped when he entered her condom less. She had always failed to trust any other guy, as she always told them to place a condom, but something about Adam led her to trust him. Well, he was one her best friends and knew he would never hurt her- an exception being the slap on the ass he just gave her.

"You know what to do." She breathed out, as his thrusts were slow.

A bite to her neck made her groan out loud as she finally was into the moment- hoping he was too.

::

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck."

Adam slammed on his steering wheel to take out his frustrations. He was forgetful, that was something everyone knew. Hopefully Becky could understand.

As he parked he could see her car in the parking lot. Running over to it, he saw no one was inside. Maybe she was waiting outside the door? Checking his phone he realized he was pretty much an hour late and now he regretted not replying to her texts once he left Courtney's.

He made it to his door, but wasn't outside. He let himself in with his key and saw Brian talking to Becky. She was smiling mid conversation until her gaze met his, an instant stop to her smile.

Brian turned and raised a brow to his friend. Knowing at once that he should leave the room.

"Becky, I'm sorry." Adam started as he saw Brian get up to leave the living room. "It slipped my mind we had that project to work on. I just got caught up."

The blonde closed her eyes and she let out a long sigh. She didn't move from the couch as she waited for him to approach her. She was at the brink of the line with this project as they were forced to communicate when she wanted nothing to do with him.

"What was it this time? Drinking, smoking, or something new?" She crossed her legs and kept her back straight. She tried hard not to judge him but being that she felt anything but love for him at this moment made it near impossible to judge his demeanor.

Adam rolled his eyes and threw his backpack to the ground. "I can do what I want, remember?" He plopped onto the couch adjacent from her and stared. She was looking at him but not _at_ him. Her eyes were on his neck and soon connected the dots as to what she was staring at.

"Right." Becky bit her lip and stood up. She couldn't believe he had a hickey on his neck. It was something he hated to have on his skin and wouldn't allow her to mark him. She would never mind and would easily cover it up with make up. "I'll do the assignment on my own. Don't worry, I'll send it to you after."

He gulped and reached for her when she began to walk away but she didn't care for his touch. "Don't! Have fun with whoever or whatever you're doing."

"It doesn't mean anything, Becks."

"Wow, but you have no self control do you?" She countered and turned to face him with an emotion his never witnessed from her- betrayal. "You can _never _help yourself unless you have some sort of babysitter. I'm so done, Adam. You go make out with some other girl only a week after a break up!"

Adam exhaled, as she seemed oblivious to what really happened. He rubbed his face and Becky watched, as his expressions seemed to change from confused to pensive. "You look so tired, Adam." She commented out loud, thinking she had only said it in her head.

But as the words were out, she couldn't take it back. She backed up her response as she took in his appearance and just realized how scrawny he looked. The t-shirt used to fit him tight but was now loose. "Not that I mind, I'm concerned."

"You don't have to be."

"But I am."

His blue eyes avoided her gaze as he looked up to the ceiling. He fought hard but it was impossible to hold back the tears stinging at his eyes. "I'm fi-"

"You're fine." She finished for him with a forced acceptance. She wanted to stay but knew it was time to leave.

It was the first time she ignored his tears and let him be.

* * *

_sorry for such the long wait! been extra busy but i'm glad you guys enjoyed it and hated the cliffhangers, haha. i love ending them with cliffhangers, its my favorite thing-sorry about that. let me know what you think of this chapter! so far adam's digging himself into a deeper and deeper hole, clearly not himself at the moment._

_next chapter you'll get a little more insight into how becky is handling this situation. read and review, thanks xx_


	50. Scrawny Is Better

"So I just left."

Becky finished off with a sigh. She had just finished telling Leslie about what had occurred with Adam less than two hours ago.

"Do you feel bad?"

The blonde nodded and held in a sob. She had mixed emotions at how she handled the situation.

"Well don't. You put your foot down." Leslie toyed with the book in her hands. They were in the cafe as they met up to do homework. She was surprised when Becky burst in, immediately venting to her about Adam. It was a first since the break up where she actually told Leslie how she felt. Not that Becky was being totally open, but she seemed to be trying.

"I don't know how he does it- how he can be so selfish yet convince me that he regrets it." She plays with her pen as she glances at her paperwork. It was difficult to focus when so much was on her mind. "He probably doesn't care."

"That's not true. It's obvious he's not himself." Leslie came to his defense. Whenever she ran into him, she could tell something inside him was different. It was most likely was the stress that hit him like a brick and his coping mechanisms weren't the best choices.

They sat in silence until Becky and Leslie took out her phone as they both received a text.

The Latina grinned as she read it while Becky seemed uninterested. Guessing by the look on her friends face, Becky knew what she had in mind. "No, no! I'm not going to go to this party, I feel like crap."

"That's why you _need _to go. Do what Adam is doing and find a hook-up!"

::

"I can't believe you convinced me to come."

Becky couldn't help but smile at her choice to be dragged along. Her feet felt heavy in the sand and she felt a sort of uncomforting without Adam by her side.

"Look, just stay for a few hours and if you get bored you can call Uber to leave."

"Wow! Now you're willing to ditch me." The blonde teased with a smile and Leslie laughed. It was nice to see her friend loosen up a bit than from earlier today.

Leslie led them to the beach house and directly to the bar. Parties on a Thursday weren't uncommon but they were for Becky. She had no classes tomorrow but it wouldn't mean she wanted to drink. Glancing around, the party had a good vibe with all the faces being familiar.

One in particular caught her eye. "Who is that?" Becky asked her friend in a whisper as her eyes focused on a teen sitting on the couch.

He was around six feet, Adam's height, and had a snapback on over his luscious looking blonde hair. His eyes seemed to be a hazel that looked appeasing on his tan skin. She had been staring for a while that he felt her eyes on her. He smiled as Becky also caught his attention and she returned it.

"Ooh, girl. He's a transfer, a year younger than us. I think his name is Josh or something." Leslie watched as her friend kept glancing at the boy. It was strange seeing her become attracted to someone who wasn't Adam-especially since the guy looked completely different from her old beau. "Are you going to talk to him?"

"I don't know, should I?" Becky had her back towards him and watched as her friend took down a shot. She felt almost nervous as she became aware none of her friends would remain sober. Adam was always the one to stay sober with her. "I keep thinking about him."

"Josh?"

"No, Adam!"

Unknown to them was that Adam was also at the party. He was on the shore with his friends- JJ and Art. Both his friends were drinking but he was yet to consume any alcohol.

It didn't feel right to him. As if there was a reason to hold back tonight.

"Hey, I'm pretty sure I saw your ex like fifteen minutes ago." Art mumbled to him as he threw a rock, skipping it in the water.

"Wait, she's here?" Adam glanced to the beach house with a grin. The last time they spoke ended terribly and he wished to speak to her again before they left for winter break. There was no way he would leave it like this. "I'll be right back."

::

"This is the first time I'm seeing you this year. Why is that?"

Josh smiled at the blonde who he finally decided to approach. He was always a shy guy but befriended people easily since he was easy going. Becky wasn't the first girl to catch his eye but she was the first who he finally came up to.

"I'm not much of a drinker." Becky admitted with a shrug. She knew flirtations were key when meeting someone you're attracted to but she hadn't done it in so long it felt strange. It was easy when it came towards Adam since she knew exactly what to do or say to make him blush or speechless. This stranger was new to her so it felt out of place.

His hand reached for the cross on her chest, "Oh, now I get it. You actually go through with that?"

Her brows furrowed at his question. "Well I did commit to my lord." She kept her poker face that soon shifted to a smile as he laughed at her light joke.

"I don't want to be intrusive into your beliefs, so let's talk about something lighter... Like, your favorite food?"

She cracked a smile as she could sense his slight discomfort. He wasn't good at this either. As they talked they had shifted to the side of the house, her back to the wall and him in front of her. It was a common stance for Adam and her but she felt a little suffocated as he was bigger than Adam. Her ex was scrawny and looked the part even when he had gained muscle. The guy she was with looked buffer and it was evident even with clothes on.

As he moved closer to her, she felt her heart race. The thought of kissing or touching anyone but Adam was impossible for her. She had thought Adam felt the same but he easily made out with another girl.

Maybe this is what she needed. Maybe a kiss from a stranger would distract her mind and give her euphoria that it gave Adam.

Josh was in the middle of talking when he felt her hands on his neck. It was in seconds their lips collided and she kissed so slowly that it was breathtaking. His arm went around her petite waist and pulled her closer.

Adam reached the end of the house and sat down on the couch. His eyes glanced out the window for a second and he slowly realized the figure outside the window looked familiar. The dress the girl wore who was under the guy looked like one Becky owned.

His eyes squinted and he also took notice in the familiar shoes and the straight blonde hair.

"Oh." Adam said out loud as it hit him.

His heart dropped as she took in his ex making out with a guy in public. He gulped as he felt an aching in his body as he fell numb. Adam wanted to go outside and pull him off her but he knew he had no right. His instinct wanted him to grab Becky by the hand and pull her away from him. He wanted to keep her out of harms way and out of the strangers arms but she didn't need to be protected or to be saved.

She didn't need anything from him.

::

"Soooo... Did anything happen?"

Christina perked a brow as she interrogated her friend. It was Friday so they relaxed on the campus lawn since neither of them had classes. Becky was on campus since she would work tonight and Christina was there to grab lunch.

"How do you know about this?" Becky smirked and by the look she gave her it was clear Leslie mentioned it. "No, nothing. We kissed then I left. Didn't even give him my number."

Her friend looked at her confused, "Wait, why? Leslie said you were into him from the start!"

Honestly, to Becky it didn't feel right. Kissing Josh was more like a chore she had to do in order to see what would happen. She wanted to know if hooking up with someone else would be easier or make it more obvious she still loved Adam. The way he kissed and talked couldn't help but be compared to Adam's style.

Josh couldn't even get into religion while Adam loved getting to heavy, dark topics because Becky's mind is what intrigued him the most. The way Josh kissed was sloppy and rushed, while Adam was so gentle and slow with a smile on his lips. Maybe it had to do with him having drink beer but that didn't matter.

"I prefer scrawny guys." A simple answer would do.

Christina smirked and understood her broad reply.

::

"Adam."

"Becky?"

She smiled small as she watched him turn off the radio system. He was doing his thing hosting the school radio and she had watched him throughout it. He hadn't even noticed and that always reminded Becky how much he loved doing this.

"What do you want?" He let out a sigh and wouldn't meet her eyes. He hung up the headphones and was pushing in the chairs, giving her anything but his undivided attention.

The blonde looked surprised at his defensive demeanor. She knew why though.

"I know you saw me." The pause caught Adam's attention.

"I don't know what your-"

"Adam... You saw me and I know it hurt you but know it was nothing. He was nothing. You're my something."

The small smile that formed on his face made her happy. He believed her.

Even if there stood piles of metal between them as he was still behind the radio station, she leaned over to capture his face in her hands. The kiss was sudden and quick but he smiled either way.

"I love you." Becky mumbled against his lips while her eyes stayed shut. "You're my man." Her hands traveled down his arms as she craved his skin and his warmth.

But she didn't stay for long. She was gone as quickly as she came in. Adam knew it wasn't her taking him back. It wasn't Becky claiming him as hers. It was the other way around. She was claiming her as his. She would always be his and he was happy knowing no one had her heart but him.

* * *

_hey thanks for the reviews! this chapter is rather lengthy since i make you guys wait SO long. just lately i added the last chapter into the all ready written ones so I've been changing things and adding more things in between. I'm trying to __capture more of their emotional feelings and connections, which is difficult to write out sometimes lol._

_i hope you guys like this chapter! i also know what I'm doing after their graduation hehe in order to extend the story a bit, i'll be shown later in the story. by the way thank you so much for sticking around after 50 chapters! i also got a review telling me to update my other story more often and trust me i try! thank you again._


	51. Keys

"It's been a while since we've done this."

Luke plopped down next to his sister. It was so rare for her to be home at night when he was here. She was either at work or at Adam's place since he didn't have much of a warm welcome to come over.

"I know, I got the night off!" Becky smiled brightly and propped her feet up on the table. Her parents were asleep as it was past nine o'clock. It was funny to think about that she would always be in bed at that time but her life had shifted so much. Thinking about it now made her a little sad, as she would usually be at Adam's place at this time.

Her brother chewed on some popcorn and she could sense that his eyes were on her from time to time. She hadn't exactly been open about her problems with Adam or even why they broke up so he was concerned. "How have you been doing?"

The blonde quickly shrugged, causing some hair to fall to her back. "It's been fine. Just a bit bored lately, I always have something to do."

"Especially since you had school, work, Adam, and a wedding to plan. What a change." This caused her to give him a questionable look. "Sorry for bringing up the wedding but you need to talk about it, Becks!"

"I don't need to do anything."

He tilted his head and smirked at how much she was pushing this topic away. "You use to be so talkative and needed to tell everyone what was on your mind. Now you just hold everything in, it's not healthy! I know you use to talk to Adam about everything but you can't."

Luke wasn't scared of his sister but knew she would get a little upset at how he was trying to force her to do something. "You dump him out cold after almost five years and an engagement." He knew making it seem like she was in the wrong was the bad way to go, but fact was she would defend herself—finally getting her to speak.

Becky groaned, getting Luke to stop, and then puckered her lips. "We needed to break up. The engagement came too soon and we- he couldn't handle it. I was perfectly fine but that didn't matter!" It felt bizarre as she finally begin to vent her feelings out to someone. For the past week and a half she's been holding everything in from her friends.

She met his eyes and he was quiet, instantly knowing she would keep on talking. "For the past month he, like, would barely talk to me or look at me. Any conversation we had was just an "okay" and every time we were together he looked miserable. No date nights or movie nights or anything it's like he gave up." Becky let out a jagged breathe and wiped at her eye, "so I gave up."

"Why didn't you just talk it out?" Luke reached over for a tissue and passed it to her.

"He did something and it was the last straw, I couldn't stand being around him." Becky bit her lip and continued to dab at her eyes.

He had a gut feeling she was hiding something major but he didn't want to push as he could tell she was in major pain. "And he was fine with the break up?"

Becky nods, "He needed it, I just knew it. I needed it, too, but he's worrying me. He's drinking a lot and smoking marijuana. The-" she struggled as she thought back to what Christina had told her, "Someone told me he might have hooked up with another girl. I don't know who but it doesn't even matter."

She hadn't heard about the hook-up until after she approached Adam in the studio. It was probably an hour later after kissing him and claiming her love for him that she heard someone whispering about it in the library. Becky had felt so proud and positive that she interacted with him on _her _terms but it all went to the gutter at hearing "_She said Adam was great in bed. I heard he was packing a good one."_

"That's screwed up. Now he's just going to bang everyone he can." Luke quickly apologized but knew his sister didn't deserve that. "Becks, you deserve to be happy! You both weren't, obviously, but I know you love him. He's lost but that doesn't give an excuse for his actions, you know?"

"All you can do now is wait to see what happens but in the meantime you can't let yourself worry about someone who isn't worrying about you."

::

The bonfire was loud. Well the teenagers were loud.

She had been to the bonfire every year, but every time without Adam's presence. Last year he had missed it, as he was too depressed from his parents divorce to participate. Now she was here without him as they were on break.

It felt more like a breakup than a break since she had made out with someone herself. Whatever it meant, she wasn't exactly happy. She missed him incredulously. She felt vacant half the time and had a gap in her lifestyle. The only time she felt whole was when she would spot him in the hall of the school or run into him on campus. Their friends tried hard not to arrange a meet up where they could bump into each other. Even if they barely worked on the project together, those brief fifteen minutes together felt right.

Adam would usually see her and smile, sometimes wave. It gave her those butterflies and made her feel as if she was the only girl on his mind. But after seeing first hand the hickey on his neck and his flirtations to other girls, she knew this wasn't true. Also, with Christina letting her know about the rumors circulating around about him sleeping with someone else, it was different. She felt betrayed even if she wasn't certain about it.

Becky needed to hear it from him and it shocked her that he hadn't said anything. He would be so honest with her their whole relationship-up to the last month. Had he cheated on her before? Was that the whole reason he wanted to be away from her is because she wouldn't put out in bed?

Her mind wandered that she didn't notice Leslie approaching her with some drinks.

"Why you standing here by your lonesome?" She smiled at her friend whom she found sitting on a log a few feet from the fire. "You're single! You should mingle!"

The blonde laughed a little, "Did you already take some shots?"

Leslie tried to play coy but ended up laughing. "What, do you want to join me?"

"No thank you, but thanks for this juice?" Becky examined the cup and smelled it in order to make sure nothing was in it. She had no desire to be drunk as she's seen how much her ex-boyfriend has been drinking.

The two girls went over to the area where food was being given away for free. Nonetheless she can see Adam in line where the pizza is. He doesn't see her as his back is towards her.

Again, she's hit by many emotions as she notices how he's already struggling to stand up straight. He's next to Rico, who also doesn't see her. Of course they don't, as she always seems to be the one looking at him.

"Is she still looking?" Adam asks his friend and he shakes his head. Becky was now talking to Leslie, who has been joined by Alex. "I should go say hi."

Rico perks a brow up and poked Adam's forehead repeatedly, "You clearly aren't thinking straight. You're already tipsy and you slept with Courtney. Twice! That's just loads of no."

"I need to tell her about it."

His friend's eyes bulged out at how Adam wanted to tell Becky. Rico knew they were quite open with one another but they exactly weren't on speaking terms.

"I feel bad about it, sort of. I just want her to know from me directly."

"And what are you going to say? Hey, Becky, baby, I got drunk and hooked up with the girl who's in love with me. And she was so good, I hooked up with her again but that time I was sober and knew what I was doing and can remember every single detail. But I do feel bad because I love you, no one else!" Rico mocked Adam's voice and smirked at how Adam looked completely entertained. "You can do what you want but that's not so smart."

Adam nodded and knew he should talk to her about it but not in this setting. He did want to talk to her though. After she approached him after kissing the random at a party, he's had a huge sense of guilt for hooking up with Courtney twice. It had occurred before the party, so this came to his benefit—at least it wouldn't seem like pay back for kissing the mysterious blonde.

He _needed_ to talk to her.

::

Becky was walking in the parking lot as she looked for her car keys.

She couldn't find them anywhere and assumed she dropped them in the parking lot.

"This is not my day." Becky whispered to herself as she looked all over the ground. She could hear the faint sound of people cheering and the music. She failed to hear the boy approaching her.

"Becks!"

She jumped at the voice and looked back to see him standing there. "Adam, don't do that."

He grinned and reached inside his pocket, feeling her keys. Rebecca, a mutual friend, found them and he begged her to give them to him so he would have an excuse to talk to her. But he knew if he gave it to her she would leave.

"We should talk."

Becky glanced at him and continued to look into the bushes. At that point he knew better than to manipulate her, "I have your keys, Becks." He offered them to her and at the moment she reached for them he felt a tingle at their contact.

"Thanks." She sighed as he continued to stand there with his hands in his pockets. "What do you need to talk about?"

He forced a small smile at how she seemed to be forcing herself to talk to him, "I know you've heard some things about me lately and I just wanted to be hon-"

"Don't. It's none of my business." Becky shook her head. She knew he would come to her about the hook ups but now that he wanted to explain, it pained her heart. It did feel like betrayal. Even if he hadn't verbally said it, she knew but how he was staring at him and the urgency in his voice that the rumors were true. "I do what I have to do, you do what you have to do. Okay? Goodnight."

Her feet began to move to her car and he followed, "Becky, I know we're screwed up right now but we aren't going to see each other for almost a month."

"Maybe that's good for us." She was being closed off and she didn't care. She was hurt and needed to be away. Becky had felt so guilty of kissing the junior at the party but nothing could hurt as much as this did. A kiss was nothing compared to sex.

"Listen." Adam pressed his back to the car door, keeping her from unlocking it. "Please listen to me."

Again, she gave up and let him have his way. Maybe he would talk and let her leave.

He stood up straight and looked away from her gaze as he tried to collect his thoughts as alcohol flowed in his system. "I know you love Christmas and I honestly love spending it with you but I know we won't have that this year. And I know your birthday is coming up too and we can't celebrate it. Just thinking about it makes me sad."

"Get to the point."

"I got you a present."

"I don't want it. Please move now." Becky had no idea what he wanted from her but giving him the satisfaction of wanting his attention or his gifts or his love wasn't going to happen.

Adam moved away and felt as if this was his last chance to talk to her before the break. He rummaged through his pocket and pulled out a small box. "Take it."

Becky didn't even look at his direction as she particular hit his chest with the car door. Adam literally felt hurt as his chest stung. She was fed up with his actions and his constant use of manipulation. She wouldn't feel bad for not accepting his gift or listening. She would not give into his needs yet again as he continued to push hers aside.

The car drove away and Adam stood there in agony. The box was flung into a trash bin as he walked back to the bon fire.


	52. About Time

"Drew always talks about you."

Adam forced a small smile as he was forced to interact with someone Drew had introduced him to.

The brothers were at the company's Christmas party. Drew could sense Adam's unhappiness the instant he arrived in Canada. There seemed to be a void as Becky wasn't with him. So Drew had decided to introduce him to a blonde name Stacy.

"He told me you're still in college, but I don't mind that." She smiled her pearly whites that he knew had to be done with whitening. Her flirtations were forced onto him as he tried his best to interact with her and create conversation. It was nearly impossible as she ended anything he would talk about.

_So self-absorbed. _Adam thought to himself as he sipped his champagne. His eyes roamed the environment as many were in suits and business apparel. Even with that sort of clothing, they weren't discreet with conversation.

Stacy reached for the younger man's tie in order to catch his attention. She was growing a little upset at how uninterested he was. Drew caved in easily to her big breasts and bright smile but his brother was a different story. His eyes barely focused on her and he seemed more interested in his phone than anything.

"My office is empty."

The whisper against his ear made him shiver, he didn't know if it were from disgust or desire. He followed as if giving up while the blonde smirked.

::

"I need to know, Adam. Is the wedding on hold or cancelled for years to come or what?"

He met up with the planner and his mom was with him. He needed to meet up with her before he had to go back to Tampa but now that he was at the cottage where all sorts of plans were drawn out it felt wrong.

"It's on hold." Adam answered without a thought.

The past month being broken up with Becky did open his eyes to how much he needed her. Now that he had heard the entire wedding being described to him and how he had been taken to the actual spot where he would of stood to get married, he realized how he still pictured Becky.

Not Courtney or the girl he had _almost _hooked up with. It was Becky. He remembered her describing how she wanted her veil and the precise flowers she wanted to hold. And how she wanted Luke to be the one to give her to him.

"Keep all the plans and everything. Hold out on the invites but we need to come up with best man suits." He fidgeted with his phone in his hand as he waited to be left alone to call.

The planner went over who the priest was as they knew Mr. Baker wasn't too happy about it and just the few details left before she went back inside with his mother.

He quickly dialed and of course was directed to voicemail.

"Becks, I'm at the cottage. I wanted to tell you earlier that I had sex with someone at school and it almost happened again last night… Strange as it sounds, it made me realize something. So we need to talk. Bye."

::

"I can't believe he almost did it again." Leslie shook her head after listening to the voicemail Adam left Becky.

Becky had played it out loud as she was with her having lunch. "What would he even mean about _almost?"_ That part of the voicemail confused her greatly. Was she supposed to be proud that he held himself back?

Leslie turned on the car engine and buckled up. "I have no idea."

"I'm probably never going to have sex with him again."

Her friend furrowed her brows as she listened to Becky, "This is why STD tests exist! But you are interested in sleeping with him, hm." Leslie poked her arm and laughed. "I feel like this break up is just making it worse for you guys."

Thinking about it, Becky could agree. But after listening to the voicemail it was obvious he had felt something after talking to the wedding planner. She didn't know if it was him realizing that their relationship was doomed or that their relationship could be restored.

::

"Becks."

"Adam." Becky sighed into the phone as she had finally given in to calling him back. It was the end of the day and she had lost her direction of mind when she scrolled through his hastygram pictures. "I got your voicemail."

"I'm sorry for being so direct and for sleeping with randoms who don't mean anything to me." He said it so quickly she had no time to stop him. "I needed to say that before anything."

She bit her lip and found herself playing with the engagement ring on her desk. "Then why'd you sleep with them, Adam? That really... That really hurt me."

It was time to express her feelings about it and this was the time to do so as he wouldn't be right in front of her. Whenever she sees him she wants to forgive him at an instant or to push him because she's so angry.

"I-I know. I would honestly take it back. Putting everything into drinking, drugs and sex isn't going to help us. I haven't drank since I got here and obviously haven't done weed."

"But you slept with someone."

"Because I felt empty. I needed something to fill that void and screwing someone was the idea but all it did was remind me why I was with you in the first place, you know? Not that the only good thing about us is sex, but I like you as a person. I like how confident and in control you are of everything. How you know yourself so well you know what you need and why you do, unlike me where I need to be led like a child."

Becky smiles lightly as he continues to list all the qualities that he admires about her.

"You're so interesting and complex to talk to because of your opinionated views. Or how passionate you are. You're just so passionate about everything and I miss that in my life."

"You can stop now, Adam." She gazes now at the framed Polaroid she has of him that she took when he felt most confident after his chest surgery. "We need to learn how to handle us, you need to learn how to handle yourself."

Adam looked up to his ceiling as he lied in bed. "I know. I just needed this month break even though I handled it terribly."

"Terrible isn't the best word to describe it."

He laughs into the line and grins, "Let's meet up. I'll be back at my apartment in a week."

"Okay, Adam. I'll text you."

"Okay, Becky."

* * *

_enjoy guys! this is the most I've updated in a while hehe. as you can tell their break might just be over... but doesn't mean theres any less drama to come. btw who's been watching degrassi? adam and becky finally broke up ! i also heard becky mentioned adam's name in tonights episode! tell me what you think._


	53. Lighted Sky

"Are you going to the sky lantern thing tonight?"

Adam took a mouthful of salad as he let Courtney answer.

"Probably. Want to come with me?"

He looks at her with amusement and took his time chewing, followed by a sip of lemonade. "I might go with Becky, I'm talking to her after lunch."

Courtney perked a brow up and now knew why he was acting a little different. He had just gotten back into town the day before and had asked to meet her for lunch today. "So you called me over to tell me we can't bang anymore."

"Pretty much." Adam smiled at her and shrugged. "She doesn't know it was you who I slept with so I think we can still be friends."

She laughs at how he expects Becky to understand the situation. "I enjoyed our times together but like I promised you, I knew how to handle myself. You're still a friend who I would bang if you asked for it."

Adam grins, "If we ever want a threesome, I'll ask you to join."

They shared a small laugh. Courtney eyes him and reaches for a piece of lettuce. "You think she'll take you back though? You've really been out of it lately." She licks the dressing off her fingers.

"I hope so. I'm obviously doing a cleanse of my system and focus more on school and finding a job."

"Maybe you should just forget about the job until a few months. You even told me you weren't sure if you were staying in Canada or Florida." Courtney suggested. "Even though, I do see you staying here."

He shrugged, "Wherever she is, I want to be."

"Adam." She started, as she got more concerned. "You need to put yourself as the same level of importance as her. This is why you guys broke up, she wanted to hear your opinion and you wouldn't give one."

Sighing, he looked away from her gaze. She was right. He would agree to everything she wanted and not fight a battle until the very end where he had basically given up. "Maybe you're right, but we have to see. I'm not even sure where her and I will stand if we get together. She'll probably want to take it slow, which I wouldn't mind."

Soon enough, lunch was done and he was taking her back to her place.

"You sure you don't wanna join me?" Courtney teased as they stood outside his car. "I had fun with you, not going to lie."

He felt her hands on him and he smiled. There was always chemistry between them and he knew that hooking up with her was a twice in a lifetime opportunity. "I had fun with you too, but twice was enough."

"Totally understandable." Courtney ran her hands along his waist until they rested in his back pockets. "I'll miss your cute ass."

::

Adam's palms were sweaty, which would only occur when he was really nervous. Meeting up with Becky had him on the edge all day and he finally felt as if a weight would come off his shoulders once he spoke to her.

Holding flowers in his hand, he rang the doorbell. He exhaled as he waited and looked at Becky with a smile once she answered the door, "Hi."

"Hi." Becky couldn't help the grin on her face as she spotted the flowers in his hand. "Are these for my mother?"

He laughed and she gleefully took them once he handed them to her. "Come in. No ones home."

She had precisely asked for him to come around this time because there was no chance her parents would want to see him. She was surprised she even wanted to see him and welcomed him so easily after learning he hooked up with various girls during the break.

But once she saw him outside her door, she melted. It had been a month of not seeing him, and it bothered her because of all the distance they dealt with for two years. They promised each other they wouldn't let themselves pass by without communication for too long.

"You got a haircut?" Becky questioned him as they got to the back patio. She was usually the one to cut his hair. "It looks nice."

"Thanks." Adam grinned and sat down at the glass table outside and watched as she sat angled towards him. "I just want to say I appreciate that you're willing to talk to me."

She propped her elbow on the table and watched him, as he wouldn't meet her gaze, as if he was embarrassed for what he did to her. "I know you told me to do whatever I wanted but I still feel bad."

"I know, Adam. We just need to move on and figure out where to go from here." This is where she was always stumped. She wanted to be with him but get hesitant, as if she wanted for him to win her heart back. He was already trying, as he had proved with the flowers and cleaning out his system. "What do you want?"

"You... I want us, again." Adam tapped at his knee and he finally met her gaze. "If we're engaged or not, I just want to have you again. In any form, as friends, friends with benefits, girlfriend, or fiancée."

Becky sighed and moved around in her seat, "I don't know what I want. You confuse me... One day you're the sweetest man that treats me like royalty then the other you don't even want to see me. I know part of it could be the stress from the wedding and everything I put on you but outside factors shouldn't impact us."

His eyes wandered as he read her body language. She was tense and closed off, as she seemed to want to be far from him as possible, yet she sat so close to him that he could move his foot and it would touch hers. "But they do Becky. We have to work as a team to deal with the outside stuff and once we're married-if we do get married, we have to deal with housing, family, kids, jobs, cars and everything else."

"Adam, I know but it shouldn't impact the way we treat each other. Just because you want to have a motorcycle and I want to have a Vespa doesn't mean we're going to ignore each other and that you can push me away. We have to compromise."

"But you weren't compromising for the wedding. You forced me to agree with July or else you would be pissed off about it and not marry me. Admit it." Adam sounded more disappointed than anything. She was trying to solve a problem but it only pinpointed the hypocrisy she always shown. "I'm tired of having to agree with you and everything you say and act a certain manner when you don't."

Becky pursed her lips. She knew that was always a problem of hers as Adam had pointed it out several times before, "I'll work on it. I always try to work on it... But right now there's no wedding to worry about. I shouldn't even be engaged at this point."

"I agree."

The breakup and his actions of sleeping with other woman proved he couldn't even control himself. It showed Becky how easily he could give up his commitment to her, so it hurt to trust him.

"But I want to be with you, Adam." He looked at her and couldn't help but smile a little at her honesty. "I just need to trust you again."

"And you can. Whatever you want me to do, I'll do."

Becky sighed in relief when he said that, "Well first off, you need to make sure your..." She points to his crotch, "is clean and safe?"

Adam chuckled and nodded. At least this gave hope that they would be intimate once more.

They were on campus as the Sky Lantern event had started a few hours ago. They had planned to arrive when it first started but got held back as they spoke for hours at her place. Catching up on everything they have missed in the past month.

"I really hope no one approaches us." As much as he loved being around his friends, he wanted alone time with her. Their friends would ask so many questions when in reality he didn't have it in him today to explain why they broke up to just get back together.

"They'll give us our privacy." Becky smiled at him as they stood in line to get their own sky lanterns. The line seemed to be moving slowly as the ones in charge had to help set up every lantern being handed out.

She reached for his hand, having their first form of physical contact for a while. They agreed to take it slow and Adam would just follow her lead, as he wasn't one to take it slow. He happily took her hand and intertwined their fingers. It felt like a welcome into the relationship.

Eventually, they received their lantern and miraculously hadn't been bothered by anyone. "Come on, follow me." Adam grabbed her hand and led them far that they could see the giant clash of lights in the night sky.

"Why are we here?" Becky looked at him bewildered and he just smiled with a shrug.

"We'll let it go at the same time?" Adam suggested as they each held a side of the lantern. Becky agreed and they slowly lifted it up before watching it go into the sky.

As it slowly eased up into the air, Becky realized why he had moved them away from the crowd. It was their lantern that would wander to its own place. Their old problems were leaving with the lantern and wandering on its own.

They watched until it was only a spectacle in the sky.


	54. An Agreement

"There must be something wrong if he called you here!"

Becky grew more concerned the longer she sat in her chair. Being at the doctors always made her uncomfortable but it was even more stressful sitting in the doctor's office.

"Becky, it's going to be fine." Adam tried to calm his girlfriend, or whatever she was, down. She needed him to be calm for his own sake. There was a chance something was wrong because he hadn't wrapped up his junk when he was with Courtney.

The doctor eventually walked in and greeted them. It was Adam's assigned doctor that handled his t-shots and monthly checkups down in Florida. "Adam, good to see you. It's been a while."

"I know; a much needed break."

They exchanged a smile and Adam looked over to Becky, who still looked tense. She couldn't hold herself back any longer, "Why are we here?"

Dr. Haser chuckled at her worry and looked through Adam's file with a now focused look. "As for his tests, he's clean as a whistle."

"See, told you." Adam grinned and Becky side-eyed him.

"Look, I called you here because it's time for me to catch you up with something." Dr. Haser started and the teens fell silent. "The testosterone shots given to you were different from the testosterone shots given to the patients before. We started these trial shots five years ago in January and it's been five years. For you, you reach five years in July but these tests bring back results that prove our five year mark must be incorrect."

"Five year mark for what?" Becky raised a brow and we holding Adam's hand in her lap at this point. "What's different from his shots and the others?"

"The shots before were sterile. The shots given after January 2012 weren't. But the affect wouldn't occur until five years after starting the shots. What's different from his case is that for some reason, your levels seem to differ..."

Adam furrowed his brows and went wide-eyed as he connected the dots. "Because I can get someone pregnant now?"

The doctor nodded, "But the majority of it you're shooting blanks. It is a slim chance you'll have unprotected sex that'll lead to pregnancy, unless you're lucky. We aren't for sure when a person on the shots will become a 100% fertile, that would depend on the person."

Becky was stunned at this and didn't know how to feel. He had sex with girls besides her but the revelation that they could have biological kids one day made her happy.

::

"Becks, you didn't say anything the whole trip here." Adam shut the door behind him and watched as Becky went to the living room.

"I'm just shocked, I guess." She picked up the remote to the television and flipped through the channels.

Adam followed her lead and sat at the couch adjacent to her. Just because she took him back didn't mean she was completely comfortable around him. He always let her initiate any contact they had. "I can get someone pregnant, I mean that's crazy."

"Why do you keep saying someone?" She pushed back her hair and sighed in frustration at Adam's confused expression. "I thought you wanted to have kids with me not this someone you're talking about."

"Becks, you know what I-"

"Just stop, forget it." She shook her head and got up to fetch herself a drink from the kitchen. Adam just turned his head to watch her.

There seemed to be anger within her and Adam could sense it. "Are you still pissed I slept with someone else?"

She slammed the refrigerator door and scoffed at his question, "Isn't it obvious?"

"Why do you make me have to guess? Can't you just tell me how you feel? I'm not a damn mind reader!" Now he was angry, as she always seemed to make everything harder than it needed to be.

Once she was close enough, she saw he had his eyes on the screen as he set up his Xbox to play. "Really, Adam? You're going to play a video game instead of talking to me about this?"

He looked up at her and paused his game. Giving her his full attention. She stood there fidgeting with her water bottle. "What if you got that girl pregnant?"

Adam's eyebrows rose all the way up and he tried not to laugh but couldn't resist. "Becks, every girl has birth control now a days except for you."

"That doesn't help my mood now that I know you didn't bother wearing a condom."

"Babe, I wasn't thinking during that whole period. I know you're upset with the fact the last person I had sex with wasn't you but we can't do anything about it! We aren't having sex; hell we aren't even kissing. But do know this: the most intimate experience I've ever had has been with you and even though we were drunk the first and only time we've had sex it's the only time sex has meant something to me."

She stared at him and looked away, as she had to come to accept they couldn't change whom he had sex with. "I'm going to go."

"Becks come on-"

"No, I need to go."

Adam shook his head; baffled she again was going to walk away from her problem.

She didn't even bother saying goodbye. Adam only knew she was gone when he heard the slam of the door.

::

Leslie laughed after Becky explained the last argument she had with Adam.

"What's so funny?" Becky crossed her arms as her friends laughing died down. "This is serious."

"I can't take seriously when there's no serious solution to it. He screwed other people when you were broken up, did you expect him to save his dick for you?"

Becky made a face and Leslie continued, "He must have a really nice one if you keep getting controlling of it." She sipped her water with a smirk and Becky finally cracked a smile.

"It just bothers me, is all."

"But he isn't bothered at all about Josh and you kissing?"

Becky shook her head, "He understands it was just a kiss and nothing else. As soon I approached him about it, he forgave me."

Leslie nods and spots Adam walking along Courtney's side. "Why is he with _her_?"

The blonde turns her head to follow her line of sight and she shrugs, "Why wouldn't he be? They're friends."

"Becky, you can't be that naive. That's the girl he hooked up with at the party. She was the one in the stockings!" Christina had told Leslie about the weird lunch date she had interrupted between Adam and Courtney. Afterwards they had connected the dots but didn't tell Becky since she wasn't with Adam. But they had both assumed Adam had told Becky once they got back together.

Watching Becky's faltering expression, Leslie knew she was wrong. Oh boy was Adam in trouble.

::

"You didn't tell me it was _her_ you had sex with!"

Becky had gotten out of her car as soon as she saw Adam pull up. She would of waited in the apartment but she no longer had a key.

Adam opened his mouth to speak as he rushed towards her but he couldn't get a word in as she kept talking, "And then you walk around school with her as if nothing happened! She's told everyone how you were a great lay and I was so stupid to not think it was _you_ who she was talking about."

"Becky, look her and I had an agreement so-"

"Wow an agreement. What was it? You would fuck her without a condom every Wednesday at 6:30 or was it 12:30, I know how much you love to get a blow job before lunch so you can have a hefty meal after."

He bit his lip as she shoved him. It was unbelievable at the low blows she was hitting as she kept going at it while those in the parking lot listened on. "Did she hold you after too or is that my job 'to comfort and to hold'?" Straight from marriage vows, she thought.

Someone hollered out in laughter in the parking lot, which made her drift her attention from Adam for a second. Once she looked back at him, she knew she went to far when he wasn't meeting her gaze.

"I can't do this." Adam started and gulped, as he looked away, "I can't take this anger you have for me. I can't fix what I did but I don't deserve this."

* * *

_well well well more drama! lets see how they handle it. review and tell me what you think! xx_


	55. Talking To The Enemy

"Becks, that wasn't cool."

Drew was skyping Becky and he knew all about the fight since Adam called him a few hours ago. Of course Drew would be on his side but he considered Becky a sister already- they _were_ engaged for almost a year.

"You treat him like you hate him and you were engaged just a few months ago!"

"I don't hate him, it's the opposite." Becky wiped at her eyes with a tissue. She had been crying the past hour at her poorly made decision of confronting him in a public parking lot. She always had the issue of being impulsive when confronting someone. In high school, all her fights and arguments would be so public and well known because of this. It had gotten better as she grew older but it still was rather difficult for her to hold back in certain situations, just like this one when she is filled with rage.

Adam knew how to handle her public aggression well. He would always calm her or not let it bother him that it was done so publicly and would take her somewhere private to talk. But this time was different. Adam had gotten so upset; he had had enough to tell her to not speak to him. It reminded her back to the break up they had two years ago. "I just don't know what to do. It's like everything is different… Everything is falling apart."

"Yeah, because both of you are resentful and make him feel guilty. He eats himself up because of what he did and then you remind him doesn't help." Drew shrugs and glances at his cellphone, he had just received a text from a girl. He also had news to tell Becky.

She sniffled and nodded, "We were in such a good place but the engagement ruined it."

"It wasn't the engagement it's just how you guys handled it. You drove right into it and he didn't, then he tried to catch up and couldn't do it." Drew rambled and rubbed the back of his neck, "Anyways to make your drama seem like not a problem, guess what I have?"

Becky wiped at her nose, curious now to what he had to say since he wasn't one to talk of him when she was venting. "What?"

He exhaled loudly and threw his head back, "A kid."

Becky pursed her lips and laughs softly, "That's funny."

"Oh I wish I was joking." Drew bit his lip and watched, as Becky grew shocked. "I didn't know until now! She's a month old."

"Wait what, who's the girl?" Becky always had a sense Drew would be the one to make a mistake like this. He was too carefree for his own good, never learning his limitations. Becky had helped Adam in a sense of learning what line was too far to cross, while Drew had to learn himself. This kept him from ever maturing since high school—he continued to be the teen she had known for years now.

"This random I hooked up with when I moved back here. It's crazy to think I'm a dad." Drew gulped and held his head in his hands. "I honestly thought Adam would be the first with a kid, not me! I barely have my life in check right now, the job I have I hate and my dad still has to pay for all my bills."

"Well it's a little too late for a condom now!" She smiled softly, "What's her name?"

"Rose. I'll send you a picture later."

::

She kept her eyes open as she waited for her.

Becky ate her ice cream and five minutes later, which felt more like an hour, the brunette appeared. "Hi." Courtney smiled small. She pulled out the chair in front of her before sitting.

Her call was sudden but Courtney had an idea of what she wanted to talk about. She was nervous to confront the blonde since Adam had informed her of what went down. She had no idea how Becky even got her number.

"Hi." Becky forced a smile and watched as she sat across from her, leaning back. Smart. "I know telling you to meet up was random but I needed to talk to you about Adam."

"I know you're going to tell me to back off. I mean come on, that's pretty clear." Courtney grinned and Becky was taken aback by her confidence that grew all of a sudden. "What questions do you have for me?"

"How many times did you...?"

"2, once at that party and the other time I called him over." Adam had actually called her to come over but a white lie wouldn't hurt.

Becky nodded, almost feeling relieved Adam didn't seem to be the one initiating it, "Why'd you tell everyone?"

Courtney perked a brow and stood up straight, "I didn't. Like I said it was a party and people obviously witnessed us going to his room. We agreed to keep it friends with benefits so our mouths were shut about the whole hook up."

The blonde pierced her blue eyes at her and Courtney shifted starting to feel uncomfortable, "this is weird to bring up but I know he loves you. We hooked up and it was purely lust and sex that was it. He wouldn't even look me in the eyes or stay after. That doesn't mean I didn't enjoy it but that's the truth. The majority of the time he seemed to be in his own head but he always delivered."

"How helpful." She tried to remain cold. As much as she appreciated the honesty, she didn't want him near her. Courtney had touched her man in ways only Becky should be able to.

"Come on, we're both adults here. This isn't high school. I'm not hoping to get you to hate me. I know when to back off that's why I always have because I do like him but I keep my feelings in check. He knows that as well, he made sure nothing would come out of us hooking up."

::

She had contemplated all day what to do after the conversation with Courtney. She felt bad at how she spoke to Adam after learning the truth and how much she's pushed him away.

She loved him but now she was the one treating him poorly.

Since he was always the one to bring flowers along, she thought it was her turn to do so.

Becky knocked on the apartment door and smiled when she saw Rico. "Hey, how was your break?" They hugged and spoke for a little. "He's showering."

"That's alright."

She let herself go up the stairs and into his room. It had been a while that she's been in there. Nothing was different except the extra layer of dust on his desk.

"Oh Jesus, you scared me."

Adam turned around to wrap his robe on correctly, "What are you doing here?"

Becky sat on his desk chair and smiled once she realized he was using the towel robe she had given him. "To say sorry and give you these."

His eyes went to the flowers and he nodded, mumbling a thank you. "I need to change."

"We need to talk." Becky started but he wasn't having it.

"I don't need to do anything but change." He continued to stand next to his open door, waiting for her to leave but she also wasn't budging. "I'm not changing in front of you so I guess I'm going to class naked."

Becky stood up and walked to the door, Adam thinking she would walk out but all she did was close it and lock it. "Becky, come on. I have class in an hour and I haven't eaten."

"Drew told me he's a dad." She started and Adam shrugged, staying quiet as he moved to lie on the bed, as she didn't seem to be leaving anytime soon.

She sighed, "I know it's your turn to be mad at me, but at least talk to me." Again nothing as he just stared at her with his piercing blue eyes. "Fine." Before he knew it, she was on him.

"Becky wh-"

"Sshh." Her finger was on his lips to keep him quiet as she straddled his stomach. At least she was wearing jeans. "I gave you a chance to talk and you didn't."

She paused as he looked up at her with a form of open affection, a look she adored. Instigating something physical with him always caught his attention, enough to get him talking. Adam could never resist not talking or listening to her when she was literally on him.

"It really hurt to know you slept with Courtney because I felt threatened. You guys are friends and she likes you then sex adds to that. Just like with us when we are intimate I want you more and more so I was scared you felt for her in a way you felt for me."

"That's never going to happen." Adam mumbled as he shifted beneath her. His hands weren't on her, she noticed. "I only love you."

Becky smiled, "I know but sometimes it's hard to believe that."

"Then let me show it to you."

::

"Drew showed me this the day after, I had no idea I was that out of it."

Adam moves beside her in the living room after putting in the DVD, "Do you mind?" He asks her gently before sitting beside her. He didn't want to invade her comfort zone especially since all he had on were sweats.

"He filmed this?"

"Just watch."

Her eyes were glued to the screen as the recording started, Drew introduced himself and you could easily tell he was tipsy. It then shifted as he videotaped a party going on in their basement. Adam fast-forwarded to when Drew was tapping Adam. He was looking right at the screen, "I was drunk, too."

"Wow, no way?" Becky teased and Adam chuckled.

Drew began to speak, "you look a little bored bro. Not digging the chicks."

"I mean they're hot but Becky isn't here."

"You're single, I gotta remind you?" Drew laughed and Adam look unamused into the camera. "You're on tape the least you could do is smile."

"I only smile when the blonde is around." Adam answered with a smile and took another sip of his beer.

"Fine, pretend Becky is watching. Tell her what you need to fucking say."

"Really?"

"Go for it!"

Becky continued to watch in anticipation as her boyfriend on the screen grinned.

"Becky, I just want you to know that I miss you." Adam hiccupped and closed his eyes for a second, "I love you to death and I can't enjoy myself without you-like at all. Literally I'm so fucking bored and I'm drunk."

She laughed and Adam smiled to himself that she was enjoying his drunken state in the video. "Keep watching."

"This girl..." In the video he turns and points to a redhead in a green dress, "tried to talk to me but she agreed to everything I said. So boring like damn it I miss your passionate speeches about recycling and why chicken is better in vegetable oil than corn oil."

Drew interrupts, "How the hell does she prove that?"

"I don't know but I believe her. She's so fucking persuasive." At this point he's looking at Drew as his eyes shift focus, "like one time she was talking about how this cat food was better than the other and just the way she talks makes me believe anything she says. She's a fucking goddess like have you noticed when she just looks at you when she's pissed off like it scares me but I'm intrigued. I want to just look at her forever and hear her talk."

"Dude, I don't know what you're saying but that's awesome."

Adam and Becky laughed together.

"I would rather be sober and talking to her than drunk like I am now, dude. Shit, she just blows me my mind." The video then gets cut off to Drew playing beer pong.

"Adam." He's paused the video and she turns to him with a grin. "That was adorable."

"Good to know." He smiles at her and he watches as her hand grazed his tummy. He exhales at the slight touch and how much he's been craving it.

Becky raises a brow, "Look at me." His eyes then meet hers and they exchange a smile. "Now you can look at me forever."

He cracks another smile and is relieved to know they might finally get past this.

* * *

_i'm proud of how long these chapters are actually getting! i hope to keep them at this length, but don't take my word for it! who tuned into the finale of degrassi? i did and you can catch my thoughts my other story. by the way, thank you for the reviews. someone commented with a thought and it actually gave me an idea, i might actually take the route but i have to see. taking this into account, i would love for some ideas of what you would like to see. more arguments, less arguments? more smut, less smut? more mushy moments such as holidays or birthdays? more friend interactions or less? more mention of adam's transition or less? more drew, less drew? i might input some more clare because i always adored clare and adam's friendship, even shipped them at one point hehe._

_just let me know what you think so far and what you like and dislike. i do take criticism well! thank you for continuing to read and for all the support and reviews! xx_


	56. Back To The Norm

Adam smiled when he saw his girlfriend from a distance. She was talking to her best friends in front of the education building.

It was Friday and he hoped he could go out with her since the last time they were at a party was months ago.

Leslie and Christina saw him first and waved when Becky finally saw him he was already behind her. "Hi." He mumbled before kissing her cheek.

"Hey, what are you doing here?"

"I'm going to this resume workshop, what are _you_ guys doing here?"

Christina grinned, "We're spreading out the word of this frat party that's supposed to be a-maz-ing."

"That frat house has a pool, unlike the others." Leslie added with an excited smile. "Are you guys gonna go?"

Becky answers before Adam could, "No, we'll probably just stay home."

He glances at her and just decides to nod in agreement. As the girls continue to speak, Christina watches how distant Adam seems to be. Adam and Becky was always a touchy, physical couple as he would always have his hands on her but now they stood at least a foot away from each other. Becky had told her how they hadn't even exchanged a kiss for months now, Christina didn't exactly know why.

Now he just seemed to be on his phone instead of adding to the conversation.

"I'll see you later." Becky hugged the girl's goodbye and Adam just waved to them before he walked at her side. "Babe, have any plans for tonight?"

He looked at her in a skeptical way as if she was testing him, "Well that party sounded fun... We should go."

She sighed and pulled him to the side of the building. "Look, you shouldn't go because every time you do you drink." It was concerning to her how eager he was to go into a party setting. His drinking had minimized drastically but it didn't mean he could control himself once put in a bad situation.

"Oh, come on! I can control myself." Adam groaned in frustration at how much she seemed to baby him. "I'm a grown man who just turned 22, I don't need you to babysit me. I just want to hang out with my fianc- girlfriend in a social setting like we use to. They have a pool!"

He stumbled, as he always seemed to forget they were no longer engaged. He still had the plans on hold in Canada as he hoped to rekindle those feelings of getting married with her again. He very much wanted her as his wife but he was still trying to win her back.

"And there's a beach fifteen minutes away from us." Becky wittedly answered with a grin deciding to ignore his mistake.

He just stepped closer to her and reached for her hand. "Baby, I am going with or without you. Even though I prefer the ladder... We can just go for the pool, you know how much you like seeing me in swim trunks."

She laughed softly and didn't put up an argument with that. She found herself placing her hands on his sides before she kissed his cheek. "Fine, we'll go."

::

The place was poppin and it was loud. He was glad they were outside, joining everyone in the pool. Honestly, it was probably the smartest idea than being inside with the alcohol. As soon as he arrived he wanted to down a few shots, but Becky led them directly to the pool. Adam knew she was worried he would fall into the downward spiral he had before but he was no alcoholic. He would never reach those extremities of disparity.

Becky was taking off her sandals as Adam was already in the pool. Adam's eyes focused on Becky as he waited for her to remove the simple dress she wore. She caught him watching her but he didn't look away, which surprised her. I guess it was the environment that was giving him that boost of confidence. Her eyes never left his as she let her dress drop. It very much felt like all those instances in the bedroom when she got undressed.

Again, his eyes were fixated on hers as she slowly descended into the pool and joined him.

"You can stop staring now." Becky wrapped her arms around his neck.

"There's nothing else I would rather look at." Adam countered and she giggled at his flirtations. She felt his arms wrap around her body and pulled her closer to whisper in her ear, "I remember the last time we were in a pool..."

"Adam!" Becky couldn't help the shy smile on her face as she tried to push him away but he wouldn't budge, "that is not happening here."

They eventually left the pool together and found their friends there as well. "Wow, is this actually Becky and Adam in the flesh?"

Brian smirked when they approached him and Christina. "I thought you guys weren't coming."

"They have a pool why wouldn't we come?" Adam joked and it was obvious they had just left the pool from their wet hair. "It's getting way too loud in here though, so we're leaving."

He could tell his friends were disappointed but honestly he wanted time with Becky. Adam also came to the conclusion that coming to a party was too much to handle at the moment. The pool was easy-going but once inside it was hard to resist some urges. Talking to her in the pool did make him feel at ease from all the stress at school and finding a job, but that couldn't divert his mind from thinking alcohol could also help.

They were both hungry and chose to leave to catch a bite to eat—an easy excuse to leave.

"God, thank you for these cheese fries. I am dying." Adam ate slowly as he savored the fries and Becky laughed.

"I think that's the first time I've ever seen you sort of pray to God." They sat on the hood of the car as they were parked at the beach. Adam thought of it as a small date. "And of course it'd be a prayer about food."

"Of course, babe! Who would I be if it wasn't?" They laughed and Becky scooted to be closer to him. He kissed the side of her head before she leaned into him. "I love you."

The blonde wrapped her arms around his middle and found a sense of comfort when she smelled the familiarity of his cologne. "I love you, Adam." He smiled bright as she finally returned the "I love you" after various attempts. "I love how you smell. Like chlorine, fries, and Polo."

Adam chuckled and jumped as he felt her pinching his side, "Ow, what was that for?"

"Nothing, just me wanting to pinch you." Becky smirked as she pulled away in order to look him in the face. "We met when we were both 17 and now we're both 22 isn't that crazy?"

"It is, and you're even hotter than ever."

"Adam! Don't make me pinch you again." Becky threatened and he laughed.

He leaned down to kiss the tip of her nose. "But it's true, you're even more beautiful." His hand now rests on her leg. "But I love you so much more now and not because of your looks. I love how you've grown to be so independent and self aware of what you want and deserve. Like if I pulled any of this when we first started college you would have forgiven me but you know what I did wasn't right. I have so much respect for you because of this like there's no denying that I take every word or suggestion you have for me to heart because I respect everything you say to me and believe everything you recommend is from a good place."

"Really?" Her lips formed into a smile as she heard of explaining and he nods. "I can say the same for you. I know you like to joke around but I love that. I'm so uptight and tense sometimes I need that. You remind me to relax and take life into account not just plan everything ahead of time. I also like how confident you are. Trust me when I say I've had to have self control this past month."

Adam tilted his head and grinned with curiosity, "Really now?"

"Definitely, but don't get cocky!" Becky laughed as his eyes went to his crotch. "Okay, now you need to relax... I just like how you talk to people, like you know what you want and that you'll get it. And the way you walk, you have this thing about you that many girls do find attractive."

"My ass?"

"Adam!" Becky pinched his side once more and he agreed to stop. "It's like how you like the way I walk with confidence, you do the same thing. And when you act that way and you're in shorts, that's when I have no self control."

Now he laughed. "I'll wear shorts next time we're together, maybe then you'll want me to take them off."

"Mm, like now?" Her attitude seemed to shift as she moved to straddle him. "I like when you go commando."

"Becky." He whispered out as her hands went up to his hair. "What are you doing?"

She smiled as he seemed to be in a daze already and she jumped off him with a proud smile.

"Wow you tease."

* * *

_sorry for the wait! I'm now a little backed up on chapters as I'm trying to input more of what you guys requested... next up we will finally get to see adam at church and interact with the baker clan, haha. also if you read my other story- "Continuation"- the next update won't be a for a while. its pretty tough to write the upcoming episode in a good and correct manner, so i keep rewriting it, especially since i want to post both the episodes at once._

_please review and enjoy the chapter! thanks xx_


	57. No PDA

A rush hit him once he was settled in the wooden chair of the church. It was stiff on his bottom and felt extremely uncomfortable; he wondered how the people surrounding him could endure hours of sitting here.

It was warm inside, but not an extreme heat that would get you sweating; it was probably radiating from the amount of people inside. Adam had only been here a few times since he wasn't too religious. One time he came in support of Becky receiving a solo in the choir, and this time he was to do the same. Also, Becky had convinced him that maybe the sermon today could help him overcome the regret he held for his past actions.

Getting your body cleaned out from toxins was easy, but _keeping_ it clean was what proved difficulty. He had reached certain reliability on turning to alcohol for meditation and again he wasn't an addict, he was just trying to control it.

His blue eyes settled on Mrs. Baker and Luke who sat in the very first row; Adam himself was settled a few rows behind. They had not known about his reconciliation with Becky until the day prior when Becky made them aware he would be attending church that Sunday. It was nerve wrecking since approval is all he desired from her family, but instead he was always given the cold shoulder.

The strained relationship affected him greatly in the past years as he felt a form of vacancy. They were also supposed to be his family, his support system, and he had thought that five years after high school he would of gained that matter of respect but it never happened.

"Are you new here?" A friendly senior asked him. The old man had been watching Adam's actions as his leg shook and he looked dazed, "It's okay to be nervous."

Adam showed his manners and smiled at the man, "I've been here a few times... My girlfriend is the pastor's daughter."

His laugh was gentle and he pointed his finger at Adam almost knowingly, "Now I know why you're nervous."

They shared a smile before turning their attention to the start of Mr. Baker's sermon. He spoke with grace and knowledge, his eyes only connected a few times with Adam's. It held no hate or disgust. Becky's father was always different whenever up at the podium. It was as if something went through him that made him express a lighter form of attitude and joy. It must be the setting or attention.

Behind him was the choir. Becky sat in the center of the first row of the group and she caught Adam's eyes instantly. It was difficult to come to church when his girlfriend was right behind the man speaking. His eyes watched at the expressions she displayed and how she seemed to be taking everything in that her father said.

The admiration and love Becky held for religion intrigued Adam more than religion itself. He held no interest for what existed in the skies above or the grounds below, even if his parents were catholic. A grin had formed on his face without knowing as his infatuation took the best of him, his eyes never leaving her.

Becky felt eyes on her and she couldn't take it any longer, she had to look at the eyes watching her. Adam had the most beautiful eyes to her. They were so clear and so pure, matching his intentions and personality. It was hard to look away especially when he had that look of admiration that drove Becky off the roof with love. Admiration was a key in a loving relationship and luckily it was something they had never faulted at in their up and down roller coaster.

It only boosted as she sung and he almost seemed hypnotized by her performance. There was a wide smile on her face, making her eyes squint up. Adam almost clapped but realized that no one else seemed to be doing so. That would of been embarrassing.

At the end of the sermon, he felt a little sleepy. The constant talking and the singing here and there made his mind wander and he even yawned, quickly covering it up. He made his way outside, being one of the first since others wished their goodbyes or tried to talk to the pastor.

Looking up, he noticed the sun was starting to heat up and he felt swear forming at the base of his neck. The tie around him felt a little suffocating but he had to deal. Waiting felt like an eternity as he watched the door, looking for the blonde to make her way outside.

Only ten minutes later, did she finally do so- with her family trailing behind. "Oh man." He mumbled under his breath as he kicked the dirt on the ground. He clenched his jaw before turning to face her once she was near, "Hi."

"Adam." Becky smiles at him and leans in to kiss his cheek. She could easily sense that he was nervous for this interaction.

Mrs. Baker stood next to Luke and glanced to her only son as the couple interacted in front of them. Seeing Adam here was one in a million since he wasn't very religious. This stung at her beliefs, as it seemed like a joke whenever he decided to come by, as if he had nothing better to do. What made it worse was he didn't seem shamed for what he had done to their daughter. Even if she was already an adult, her mother instincts made her want to protect her.

"Mrs. Baker, I appreciate you letting me come to the churc-"

"We didn't have a choice." She interrupted and Becky nipped at her lip, noting the tension between them and she knew it would become worse when her father would join them back home for brunch. "I don't expect you to come next Sunday."

Adam blinked a few times then shrugged, "Becky had her solo today, so I came in support."

Becky softly smiled as she wrapped her arm around his waist. She couldn't resist standing close to him and snuggling into his side, as he was always so warm and tender. It gave her a huge sense of safety and comfort, and she hoped it did the same to him. Especially since the stares her mom was giving him could scare anyone away.

"Let's get going?" Luke finally broke the silence.

::

"Luke will most definitely go professional." Mr. Baker had a proud grin on his face as he spoke highly of his son.

They invited guests over and Becky knew it would be so they wouldn't have to speak with Adam. She could sense his huge discomfort even if he tried his best to hide it.

"And Becky will become a teacher, maybe a doctor in the future if she decides to pursue it." Mrs. Baker added in and their friends nodded with glee. The Richard's were very religious as well and had maintained a strong relationship with the Bakers ever since Mr. Baker became the pastor.

"What about...?" Mrs. Richard couldn't finish her question, as she didn't know the name of the boy who sat next to Becky. They knew who he was by Mr. Bakers not so highly description of him, but they didn't know him personally.

Adam looked up and opened his mouth to speak but Mr. Baker cut him off, "Adam's is doing something with radio." It was evident in his tone it was something he held no high standards for. It made Adam's already low tolerance of the family get worse since the small jabs kept going his way. He couldn't let a single word out of his mouth without the Bakers answering for him.

"It's actually difficult to do and technically called Radio Journalism." Becky countered, defending her boyfriend against her judgmental parents. There was no denying Adam was about to lose it if the passive aggressiveness continued. "Right, Adam?"

"Yes, it's-"

"Anyways, how's Jody doing?" Mr. Baker knew what he was doing but felt it was in his right. The boy had hurt his daughter in more ways than one and made a fool of the family with his drinking and smoking, something they became aware of from a daughter of a friend.

It was apparent Adam couldn't take it anymore as he abruptly stood up and left the table without excusing himself. Luke watched on as his sister apologized and followed Adam. It was almost sad seeing how poorly they treated the guy but he wouldn't speak up since arguing with his parents was near impossible. Luke had accepted a long time ago of their relationship but never maintained a strong relationship with him, only bonding every so often with sports.

Luke knew that no matter what Adam did, his parents would never accept him with Becky. They barely cared for him so Adam had to suck it up and move past it. That's why he never got involved- Luke knew Adam had to deal with it and move on.

The clinking of knives continued as they are and the couple was outside. More precisely Adam was walking to his car with Becky trailing behind, trying to stop him. "Adam! Don't let it get to you."

Adam scoffed and unlocked his car. "Don't you think I'm trying? I can't take the insults and the ignorance right now. There is too much going on for me to add this on to my plate."

"You don't have a choice Adam, they're my family." Becky placed her hand on his that rested on the car door but he pulled away. It was something different as intimacy during arguments never bothered him before but now it was anything but helpful. "I get if you're upset but it's something you can't change."

"Well I have a choice to not be around them, so I'm leaving."

"Don't… I want you here."

Becky pulled his face to look at hers. There was a second of hesitance on his part as he almost decided to stay. She was right in him needing to deal with her family but he just couldn't. The struggle of having to repair their relationship was enough, adding on the relationship between her parents was extra stress he couldn't manage.

She was stunned when he pulled away and sat in his car with ease. It seemed so easy for him to just leave her and drive away. She was left alone on the street wondering what had happened to the boy who could never say no to her, who would do anything to make her happy.

::

"I can't believe you talked me into this."

Adam sat with his back to the mirror as the barber ran his fingers through his hair locks. Brian smirked as he read a magazine.

"You need this, man. Try something new! You're always doing the same thing with your hair, it's time to start anew like your relationship with Becky." Brian flipped a page and Adam rolled his eyes.

It had been a few weeks of being with Becky again but Adam was clearly still struggling with his past demons. Going to parties was something difficult for him and Brian knew Adam regretted letting it go so far. It was as if Adam's confidence had diminished immensely ever since their break up.

"What would you like to do?" The male barber asked as he stared at Adam's head of hair.

Adam shrugged and Brian got up, flinging the magazine aside. "He needs something that says 'I'm not getting laid and I'm in student debt."

The barber laughed while Adam chuckled as well, "So you want him bald?"

"Hell no! Becky would kill me."

"I thought you weren't getting laid?" The barber teased and Brian laughed out loud. "We can add some color. Make those eyes pop out more. A blonde? You have like blonde scruff."

Adam made a face and shook his head. He would look more like his biological dad if he were to dye his hair that color. "I rather be bald."

::

Becky stepped into the apartment, glancing around for her beau. He had sent her a text, saying he wanted to talk. She wanted to ignore him for him ditching her at lunch. It made her upset as she wished for him to blend into his life again, especially with her family.

But being that they needed to repair their relationship, she decided to come by.

"Adam?" It was rather silent until she heard the creaking of the stairs.

"Hey, baby." Adam reached the bottom step and Becky stood wide-eyed, taking a double take at her boyfriend's hair. It was a dirty blonde instead of his regular dark hair. He grinned at her, wanting to know her opinion on the hair. "It was a moment of peer pressure, or Brian-pressure."

Becky perked a brow and reached up to run her fingers through it. "I like it... Matches the scruff on your face." She smiled as her finger roamed down to his cheeks. He didn't have a beard like her father, but only light blonde hairs around his cheeks and jaw. "Maybe I should dye my hair brown."

"You like your hair too much to do that, we both know it." Adam wittedly answered with a smirk and leaned over to kiss her cheek. His hands went around her, a natural greeting to whenever they saw each other. He never got tired of her hugs. "Mm, we're home alooone."

"Is that why I was invited over? A booty call?" Becky answered playfully. She pulled away and she pushed him back when he looked at her with a grin. She couldn't help but giggle when he kept his arms around her and he gave her a raspberry kiss on the neck. "Ad-am."

He loosened his arms around her and glanced at her lips. They had yet to kiss and he was starving for some attention. So was she but she hid it better as she shook her head. "Talking, remember?"

They made their way outside the apartment and decided to take a stroll, as a peaceful environment would be good with such a heavy topic.

She squeezed his hand before speaking, "I understand why you left." She paused when he looked over at her, as he remained quiet. "I wouldn't be capable of being surrounded by people who constantly judge me."

"But you were still upset." Adam glanced at her. It was a good feeling that she understood but it was another thing for her to deal with it. Becky wanted as much as he did for there to be some sort of connection between her parents and him.

"Because you left, Adam." She stopped in her tracks as she settled on a bench beneath a palm tree. He did the same, leaving barely any distance between them. She placed her hands beneath her thighs, a habit she always displayed since he knew her. "You left so quickly, without a second thought. It scares me a little."

"Why?"

Becky looked up into his eyes and found her eyes go to his hair, the new coloring being a little distracting. He did what he usually would do and just stare at her until she spoke. It didn't make her feel uncomfortable, it almost felt a little relieving that he wouldn't push for her to talk but just wait. "You always stay around, Adam. No matter what, you never leave. Even in that situation you would of just sat in your car and wait until it was over so I could leave with you, but this time was different. Why is it different?"

He pursued his lips, haven't even realized he had done this. "I... I'm just- we're not ourselves, Becky. Our relationship just isn't right at the moment. We're still in a limbo."

"I know it's different." She exhales and blinked several times, taking in the realization that he was right. She too was acting differently because of her mistrust towards him. There was clearly hesitance on her part to be intimate again, along with even being around him for too long. They were only around each other to a minimum; mostly just see each other on campus. Otherwise, her being at his apartment or staying the night wasn't an option for her; even if he had given her the apartment key back.

"The only difference is..." Becky paused as she looked off to the distance, thinking. "The only difference is I know why I'm acting this way."

Adam blinked and exhaled with a nod. "I haven't been understanding myself lately."

Becky placed her hand on his thigh, her finger running over the exposed skin since his shorts had risen up. They met each other's eyes and at that moment Adam thought she would lean in for a kiss, he almost wished. There was a second where he began to lean in but she leaned back, clearing her throat as to clear the tension.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, feeling a little shy as how he misread the message. Adam felt her hand move off him and it was clear he had ruined the moment. "I don't understand why we aren't kissing."

"Adam-"

"It's just kissing. I can control myself."

"Well I can't." Becky admitted with a shy smile. She met his gaze and his eyebrows rose up. "You think you're the only one craving some attention? I'm all over the place, I either want to kiss you or give you a blowjob."

He couldn't help but laugh and lean over to kiss her cheek, making her eyes squint at how hard he pressed his lips. "Maybe we can't kiss but we can get each other off."

She made a face of disapproval and he chuckled. "Maybe that's what you're missing. You need a confidence boost and I know how high and mighty you feel after, I, you know."

"Probably." He gently taps her knee with his own. "But you're more than that to me. You're more than my ego-checker; you're my love. You're my girl. I'll never have this love I have for you for anyone else. I'm willing to wait forever for a single kiss as long as that kiss is with you."

* * *

_ so this chapter is lengthy as heck but i guess y'all deserve it for a long wait hehe. i hope you're enjoying it and as you can tell there is some tension between them, still. don't worry, next chapter is valentines day so it'll be a little more affectionate but i can't promise anything else ! you'll see their relationship progress in the upcoming chapters and eventually they will move past this drift._

_also i found it funny how i never gave becky's parents any names? i don't even think they had names on the shows so i never even bothered. fyi i never go to church so I'm not sure if my church terming is correct like pastor, priest, sermon, ceremony? anywhos hope you enjoy, can't promise when the next chapter will be up. xx_


	58. Valentine's Day

Becky stretched her arms behind her head as she awoke from her slumber. "Ah." She sighed out after stretching her neck. Her eyes closed for a second before glancing over to her side, looking at the emptiness.

It was almost instinct to look over even if she knew Adam wasn't next to her. It had become such a pattern, as she would always spend the night at his before the break-up. It was rare for her to stay the night at her parent's home and they had grown use to it, as she was already an adult.

Even if the break up had lasted almost a month and they have been together for weeks now, it was still an occurring habit. The absence of his warmth and snores made her body slump, asking herself why she was taking it so slow.

It took her almost an hour to get ready, knowing she had to look her best since Adam was bound to have plans set for the day- it was Valentine's Day. Checking her phone while on her way to her car, Becky frowned as Adam hadn't called or sent a text. "Weird."

She was ready to call him but before she could she noticed the envelope in her car seat. What is that? Becky quickly opened it since the front was blank and she grinned as she recognized Adam's handwriting instantly.

_"Dear Becks,_

_I know it's been a while since I've written you a letter. It felt like yesterday that we were freshmen, struggling with the distance. And now look at where we are... Together. Sure, we've had our rough patches but it's clear to me that we are meant to be._

_I remember our first Valentine's Day together. I took you to the abandoned church and it freaked you out, ha-ha, but you stayed anyways. I also remember how you made us sit on the blanket instead of lying down because you didn't want to give me the wrong impression, and I respected that. It always hits me how innocent our relationship was and even if we aren't as innocent as before (you know what I mean ;)) there's still that sensation of a first love. I always feel so enlightened and happy when I take in the fact that you are my girlfriend, you are mine. You are anything but what I pictured to be my first love. I imagined someone easy-going, agreeable, pretty much a resemblance of me but I'm happy that you're not._

_I know what to expect of you but at the same time I don't and I love that about us. We know each other well but there's always that feeling of an adventure when it comes to us. Of an exploration. It drives me crazy and I love it. I love not knowing where we go from here or what you're thinking at times—and I know its something you don't exactly like since you love to be in control, but hey you must sort of like it since you're still with me._

_At the end of the day, you are my first love; my only love. I hope I express that today in a way that you believe me that all my past mistakes were mistakes and I would take it back if I could. I hope I express enough love every day to you that you believe that I do love you with all my heart._

_I love you._

_-Your hero." _

::

Adam sat on the bench with the yellow roses besides him. He was at the very first beach he had gone to with Becky when he came to Florida for the first time their freshmen year.

He had sent a text telling her to meet him here and he found himself feeling butterflies in the pit of his stomach. Maybe it was the high expectations she had for the day. No matter what, Becky always wanted to enjoy this day. It was their holiday. They spent it together every single time besides for the two times the beginning of college. Even then, they had Skype dates that were romantic as he would set the flowers and candles and they would both dress nicely.

When it came to every other holiday, Becky mainly spent them with her family and him with his. Valentine's Day was special to them since it was one of the very few holidays were their families wouldn't interfere—it was only them two in their own world.

Becky smiled once spotting Adam from the parking lot. The dirty blonde hair was still a little strange as she was use to his dark locks. It was barely evident though as he sported a Snapback since his hair had grown out past his ears. He had grown tired of his beanies, especially since the weather in Florida caused for a lot of sweat.

"Hello, gorgeous." Becky called out before wrapping her arms around his neck from behind. A smile was already on his face; he never minded when she called him that since it was definitely a compliment. He turned his head slightly and she kissed his check, "That letter was so cute, I'm going to put it in my album."

Adam chuckled and he stood up in order to embrace her in a hug, "Happy Valentines Day, love." She felt his lips on her neck, the only place he has been kissing, besides her cheek, for the past few weeks. His hat fell off his head as she pulled him close, absolutely enjoying his warmth and embrace.

Once pulling away she noticed the bright smile on his face and she couldn't help but reciprocate it. She pointed to the flowers and Adam picked them up with a shrug, "They're for my girlfriend, _but _you can have them." He teased and she smiled as she took a whiff of the dozen roses. Her eyes opened and looked at him, his gaze on her actions. "You look lovely, Becks."

"I thought you had a girlfriend?" Becky grinned as she pushed his bangs to the side. Her thumb slowly moved down the side of his cheek, running over his light scruff followed by his jaw line. It always hit her like a brick at how different he looked now. "Such a shame because you're so handsome."

Adam noticed how her gaze seemed to focus on his lips. She bit her bottom lip and he knew the look she was portraying. He knew what she had in mind but it quickly changed when she took her hand off his face and reached for his hat, shaking the sand off it. It was slightly disappointing but he would continue to respect her boundaries, always letting her dictate their intimacy. Even now, there was at least a foot of space between them.

"I have plans for us."

Becky's blue eyes looked into his, her eyebrow perking. "You do now?"

He nods with a smirk, growing more excited as the seconds passed. "It's more like a gift to myself because I've never seen this before." She furrowed he brows in confusion. "It's a surprise!"

::

"No way, I can't believe I've never brought you here before." Becky smiled with glee as she saw the sign of a boat tour that would take one to see Dolphins. When they had gone to Hawaii, they had failed to see Dolphins. As time passed, the thought of taking Adam to see dolphins had drifted and now it was almost two years since he moved here and he would finally get a chance to see them.

"I know, it's been a long time coming, Becks." Adam smirked and dug in his pockets for his wallet. He began to freak out once he couldn't feel his wallet anywhere and glanced to the car. "Crap, I left my wallet at home." They had gone to his apartment to drop off her car since they had met at the beach.

He sighed once he saw Becky taking out her wallet from her purse. "Don't worry, I'll treat you to this." She leaned up to kiss his nose gently with a smile before moving in line. It was rather lengthy being it was a hot spot for romance. Adam bit his lip, how could he forget his wallet?

"Can you buy me one of those stuffed Dolphins?" Adam quipped as he wrapped his arm around her waist. "I mean, since you are treating me." Becky shook her head with a smile.

It wasn't long until they were on the boat, moving away into the depths of the water. Adam convinced Becky to get to the front of the boat and she felt goose bumps from the cold air. "Adam, I'm freezing!" It was only seconds later that she felt him behind her, his arms around her body. He was incredibly warm and the embrace felt so fulfilling.

"Don't you dare do it." Adam mumbled and Becky let out a giggle, knowing he was referring to the famous titanic pose. She had done it when they were on their trip to Hawaii. She decided to save him the embarrassment this time and merely hold his hands in hers.

Moments like these she always adored because they were sharing a moment together. Even if plenty of others were on the boat with them, they were in their own bubble. His arms and his warmth engulfed her, as if a big shield around her. It was comforting.

::

"Adam, here it is."

Becky grabbed his wallet off the kitchen countertop. They had just gotten back from their small boat trip and she was in a delightful mood. Seeing Adam's face when he got to witness Dolphins in the water for the first time was one for the books. It was nice to share that moment that he will always remember.

He told her to come back to the house so he can make them dinner, since most restaurants were booked for the night. He was coming down the stairs as his girlfriend looked through his wallet, a confused grin on her face. All she did was take out the condom in his wallet and held it between her two fingers. "Uh, what's this for?"

Adam reached for his wallet, letting her keep the condom. "You gotta be prepared! So I just carry one around just in case..."

"Just in case, what?" Becky teased him with a playful smile. She was being very lighthearted towards him this since it didn't bother her. There was a high consideration of wanting to give herself up to him again, she just wasn't sure when.

He shrugged with a grin, deciding to tease her back. "Just in case you decide you can't resist me anymore." She was now pressed against the kitchen counter, his hands on either side of her and he leaned his body more into her. "You'll give in eventually."

Becky's blue eyes perked up and just stared back into his. This sort of proximity hadn't happened in so long that she felt her control loosen up. Whenever in these situations, she would more than likely be in control but this time it was he. He was the one pressing himself against her and his fingers moving up the length of her thigh. "Looks like you're the one who can't resist me." Becky fired back in a whisper and he smiled at her.

"That's always the case, Becky Baker."

Suddenly, they heard a third party near Brian's room. Becky hid the condom between them both as Brian appeared behind the door. "Sorry, guys. I wasn't sure if you were naked or not."

Adam let out a chuckle, "I thought you left by now. I sent you a text." He had done so to make sure Becky and him had their privacy. It wasn't so much that he hoped Becky would initiate something, it was more he wanted to make the night perfect for her.

"I was taking a nap."

Becky turned her head the slightest to glance at him, where he hadn't moved as he was still not sure if it was clear since Becky's hands weren't visible. "All Rico and you do is sleep." She managed to create small talk as she ran her fingers across Adam's stomach. He felt himself tense just the slightest when she unbuckled his belt but it led to her only sticking the condom into the top of his boxers.

She had a sly grin once stepping away from him. "I'll see you tomorrow?" Becky said her goodbyes to Brian by gently kissing his cheek and he waved goodbye to Adam who was fidgeting with his jeans. "Ignore him, he has sand in his boxers."

An hour later, they sat with across one another at the kitchen table; which Adam had draped a white sheet over and lite some candles. Becky watched as he grabbed champagne out of the pantry—it was clear he had planned out the dinner instead of it being spontaneous but she smiled at the thought. He was very romantic even if he continuously teased at her romantic gestures.

"Adam, should you be drinking that?" She questioned as he poured both of them a glass. He didn't answer as he sat back down and tried to change the subject. "Adam."

Exhaling, he shrugged. "Becks, I'm not an alcoholic. I can enjoy myself on occasions like now. Chicken tastes great with champagne." Adam licked his lips as she gazed at him. He didn't know how to feel about drinking and neither did she. Becky decided to just let it slip and let them enjoy the night drama free. They both deserved a drama free night.

They felt into a comfortable silence for a few seconds before Becky shared some news. "I can major in medicine if I stay an extra semester." Becky smiled small, feeling gleeful at the news. Adam's eyes went wide with a smile. "I'll take a few classes in the summer and then in the Fall I'll take around three then I'll be a double major."

"Becky, that's great! Look at you, a major in education and medicine. Damn, you're so smart." She smiled at his excitement for her. It blew her mind how she would see some people in relationships that would never show a sort of pride for the other, but Adam never faulted in that. He had his girl on a pedestal but he never fell disappointment if she failed at anything. "I'll stay with you. I'll be your lazy boyfriend living in his car."

She laughed softly and he smiled. "We'll figure it out."

"Hey…" Adam looked up from his food with an excited grin, an idea popping into his head. "I know this might be too much but what if we live together? We can find an apartment and stay there until we move back to Canada." He spoke quickly and with excitement, Becky smiling at the idea with food in her mouth.

"Really? You're always Mr. Traditional when it comes to living together…"

"May I remind you we were engaged? And we practically already live together." He bit his lip and moved his fork around in the green beans. "I know we are taking it slow, I don't want to force you to decide on anything. It's just an idea, you know? I'm willing to live with you and I want you to know that."

Without a second thought, she answered. "I would love that."

* * *

_well hello! sorry it took so long for the update, been super super busy now i have a job so it might be even worse now when it comes to updates. also, sorry if this seemed rather rushed and repetitive i tried to fit in a whole day in a chapter so i hope you do enjoy it. i have the next chapter written up, just need to make a few updates and changes to it before i post it._

_enjoy the chapter! xx_


	59. Underlying Tension

"What do you think about therapy?"

Adam huffed out heavy breathes as he had just finished a game of lacrosse. He had to do a double take at what she just said. "What?"

"Therapy. Couples therapy." Becky repeated and made a face when she felt some of his sweat get on her cheek as he removed his helmet.

"That's what you were thinking about while I was practicing? Thought you'd be thinking about my cute butt." Adam grinned when she looked away with a soft smile. He grabbed his water bottle and settled on the bleachers, with her mimicking his moves.

He had joined the lacrosse team once him and Becky got back together. It was a great distraction and let him take out his aggressions without hurting anyone-well except for the opposing team. They easily allowed him in since he had played in high school for his last year and it was technically a club so they had no deadlines. He was yet to get physically hurt but he thoroughly enjoyed the competition.

Becky's gaze settled on him as he drank his water, "Look, just once. Get stuff out on the table so we can move on." She had been thinking about going to therapy for a while now as there seemed to be some tension still on the table and she didn't want to dive deep into the relationship until it was all settled.

"What kind of stuff? We've discussed everything." Adam was hesitant as therapy wasn't his favorite. He started therapy since the age of five when he first told his mom he was a boy, and that didn't stop until he was fifteen. After that, he started therapy again at sixteen when he wanted the chest surgery done along with t-shots.

He finally caught a break from therapy once his t-shots started at seventeen.

"Just stuff."

"Great clarification." Adam teased with a soft smile. "We can give it a shot. What's another round of therapy gonna do to me?" He joked to ease his building anxiety.

Becky smiled and he couldn't help but mirror it. "Thank you, babe." She leaned over to kiss his cheek lightly, "I'll set it up soon."

The captain blew the whistle and Adam gave his girlfriend a kiss on the cheek before heading back to the group. She watched as he fidgeted with his lacrosse stick and knew he would take out his pent up anxiety on the field. That was the main reason she agreed for him to do such a dangerous sport.

In high school, she wasn't too nervous about it since all the kids were about his height. Even if it wasn't an official team, college kids always took their sports seriously. Even Adam, he loved to win but he was always a team player. He also had a knack for sports, as he was good at every sport he tried- this made him just below team captain.

"Go Adam!" Becky hollered out with a smile as they placed him in front to catch the ball.

Her eyes never left him as he raced through everyone. He was fast, tall, and skinny- all the qualities needed for this sport.

She fell for a jock without even knowing it.

::

A few days later, Adam was running late to the appointment.

He had gone to lacrosse practice and from all the adrenaline and running, he had forgotten he had to leave early for the counseling.

He had a few texts from Becky that asked where he was and if he was bailing last minute. He didn't answer as he parked and quickly got out the car. It took him another ten to get passed through.

Becky looked at him with a pointed look since she had been waiting for half an hour, half their session gone already. It was unbelievable that he would show up late to something important to her. But as he introduced himself to the therapist and looked at her with a smile, followed by a kiss to her cheek, she felt herself become less stiff.

"Sorry I'm late, I got caught up with lacrosse."

He sat with a little space between them, as he was sweaty. Dr. Ruffer watched them with curious eyes.

"It's fine. We can pick up the other half hour in another session..." Adam made a face to this, "But what brought you guys here." The counselor asked even though Becky had told him her reasoning in the half hour that Adam had missed out on.

"My girlfriend."

Becky ignored Adam's response and smiled to the therapist. "I wanted to come in because we were engaged for a while then had a break up, where we both did things we regret." She answered, knowing Adam would add on or follow her lead.

"Especially me." Adam looked at Dr. Ruffer's face and knew the therapist wanted him to continue. "I had sex for the first time with people who weren't Becky and it made Becky upset."

"Why'd you do that?"

"Because I wanted to." Adam saw Becky shift and cross her legs, as she grew uncomfortable. "I wasn't myself but case in point it's over with and Becky knows it's something I would take back."

"Is that true, Becky?"

She looked at Adam as his eyes were on her. "I believe him. It's not so much what he did in the past but I'm scared for the future... I'm scared it'll happen again." She fidgeted with the edge of her long sleeve and crossed her legs.

Adam stood up straight and felt a ping at his heart from her admission. "Becky, it won't. I love you."

"That didn't stop you last time." She spoke with a hesitant tone.

"What happened with "it's not so much what he did in the past?" His expression told her all that he was defensive and not up for another round of "you did this."

Dr. Ruffer silently watched, as they grew distant in the matter of seconds. Adam had moved away from her now, having his elbows on his knees and head in his hands, as if trying to curl into a ball. Becky looked strong with her posture but by her expression it was evident she had a lot on her mind.

"Does she always bring up your mistakes, Adam?"

"No."

"No."

Becky and Adam said in unison and the brown hair boy sighed. "But when she does it makes me feel miserable... Like I've said before if we can't move past that we can't be together. I'm willing to throw this relationship all away if she..." He now looked at her, "if you keep throwing my mistakes at my face. You can't bring me down every single time you have a sense of low self-confidence in order for us to be at the same level. I'm willing to throw away the love of my life in order for me to not be brought down emotionally."

::

The drive back was nothing but awkward.

She was astounded at what he said to her in counseling. She had no idea he was willing to break up with her if their relationship didn't remain balanced and positive. Sure they had their ups and downs but she never thought she brought him so down that he couldn't take it.

"Are you going to say anything?" Adam gripped the steering wheel as he focused on the road. "You ended the session early."

They were only there for fifteen minutes, so he felt bad that they basically wasted the doctor's time. He hadn't expected for his words to cut deep enough for her to remain quiet. It was his full honest conviction.

His blue eyes glanced to her at a red light and he exhaled loudly. "Becks."

"I'm just... I wanted to do this in order to make sure engagement was what I wanted." Becky admitted and she found herself reaching for his hand. "It's been on my mind for days since we discussed moving in together in the fall, it's a big step. Then you said what you said and now I don't know what to think."

" I'm putting myself first right now. I always think of you first or how something I do can impact you, and don't worry I still have that instinct, but right now I need to help myself. I didn't get to do so when we broke up and for the past month together all I've felt is guilt and resentment." He paused as he let her hand free. He stretched out his fingers, as they felt tense. "When we were engaged you had tunnel vision and let me fall so easily. What if that happens again?"

Becky sighed at how disregarded how she wished to be engaged with him again. There was no escaping the fact part of his downfall was Becky's inconsideration to what he could handle and what he wanted with marriage. Worst part is that they never really discussed of how she failed to be a team player.

"You didn't care. You still don't."

He gulped and they both knew he was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. His hands shook and tears were at the rim of his eyes. Becky ran her fingers across his forearm as she became heavily concerned. It still hurt deeply of how she handled him just of how he handled the break up. "Hey, relax-"

"Don't touch me." Adam jerked his arm away as he couldn't bear to be touched at the moment. "I don't need to be controlled or soothed right now. I just need to think."

Becky countered at his words since he was failing at relaxing. "Adam, you're crying." The sight of him in tears brought her to form her own, quickly wiping at her eyes.

"And I know how to stop myself. I don't need you to help me." They had reached her house as she had taken a ride with someone to counseling. Their eyes finally met after he wiped his eyes. She felt a pit in her stomach whenever she looked into his sad eyes. They were this clear blue that took her breathe away as it was always difficult to take in her strong warrior in such a blue state.

She placed her hand on the back of his head and soothingly stroked his hair. Even if he had pushed her away, she knew better than to take it seriously. "No, you don't but I'm here for you whenever you do need me. I was absent those past few months out of my own selfishness but know I will never let you do anything by yourself. I will never let that amount of weight on your shoulders again."

"Becky..."

"And if you ever reach a point with me that you aren't happy, let me know."

Adam could see that under her strong tone of voice, she was easily hurt from weight she also carried on her shoulders. The engagement wasn't so tough on her but the sadness he carried during that time impacted her as well. "You do the same if you ever reach that point."

She looked into his eyes and forced a small smile. The guy in front of her would always put her happiness first even if he wished not to. It was undeniable that he was still that teenage boy who was overjoyed when he finally got a "perfect" girlfriend. The love he had for her was good and bad. Love could be complete destruction and complete bliss at once.


	60. Releasing The Tension

"Do you want to marry her?"

Adam looked at the therapist with a pensive look and then glanced to Becky. He was scared to answer. "I don't know because I don't know if I can handle it." He finally admitted and let out a sigh once resting his back on the couch.

They were at their third session, as they felt necessary to keep going until all their tension was gone. Becky and Adam had yet to even share a real kiss since they abided to go slow. Yet here they were talking about engagement.

"Handle the stress?"

"Yeah, the stress." Adam felt Becky's hand rest on his thigh, slowly pushing away the fabric of his running shorts in order to caress his skin. The slow movement of her fingers always kept him relaxed as if she was his anchor that kept him from escaping into a panicked mess. "I don't want to talk about it."

The therapist nodded and with a smile jotted down more information and notes. "Why not?"

"Because I feel like it's no ones business but Becky's and I."

Becky sensed the hesitance again in his voice. He still had his walls up with the thought of counseling and it was obvious whenever Dr. Ruffer would ask something too personal for his liking. "Adam."

His eyes focused on her and they silently agreed on letting Becky talk now. "He doesn't like to open up about our relationship to anyone really, except his brother. I more than often let my friends know what's going on."

"So he's a little more private than you are? Why is that?"

"Not that he's more private, just that he feels like his problems aren't important enough to discuss them out loud. He's always been the guy to take care of his problems internally and on his own because he likes to protect someone from getting hurt or from someone feeling a sort of responsibility for his actions." Adam watched in silence as Becky answered perfectly. The summation she said about him was spot on and he smiled to himself at how they have come to understand each other so well.

Adam ran his arm slowly across her lower back until it found its place on her hip. There was something about her right now that was driving his hormones level up. Most likely having to do with how confident she was talking to the doctor. Maybe also having to do with the fact that she knew him so well that he wanted to almost reward her, to thank her for loving him enough to understand him so well.

Also add the fact it's been almost two months without physical contact.

"Adam, you in there?" He failed to hear to question directed towards him and Becky had an amused smile as he seemed to be brought back into reality. She grinned once realizing he was staring at her as he was in his own head.

"What was the question?"

Becky giggled at his cluelessness as the doctor asked a new question, "So does that happen a lot?"

"What?"

"Staring until you zone out." The doctor was almost teasing him but knew the question was real.

Adam shrugged with a smile as he shifted in his seat. "Yeah, pretty much."

::

Being inside her house with no one else around was always a strange shift in atmosphere. He could never help but be on the edge of paranoia that her parents would show up wondering why he was here. Luke didn't mind anymore but her parents didn't like him even more since they thought he used an engagement in order to keep Becky around.

"Relax, Adam. No ones going to be home for hours." Becky approached him as he stood with his hands behind his back. Her hands grazed his biceps and she felt him loosen up under her touch.

"Okay, I trust you." Adam smiled at her and she knew there was an underlying meaning to his words. They looked into each other's eyes for a few more seconds before he spoke again. "What do you wanna do?"

She grinned at his question and didn't answer as her hands went up his sides, purposely pushing up his shirt in order to reveal his tummy. "More like _who_ do I wanna do." Her smile widened, as he looked surprised by her revelation.

"Becky, are you sure?" Adam spoke gently as he stared into her eyes. "I mean, I'm not against it but I still haven't showered from my game and your parents might come in and-"

"And nothing." She cut him off as her hand traveled down to his crotch, gripping through his shorts since going commando after practice was normal for him. "You're going to take me upstairs, get me undressed..." Her mouth was now on his ear as she whispered the last part, "And make me yours."

She grinned to herself, as she knew the effect she had on him. His reaction being exactly what she hoped as he began to remove her top right in the kitchen. Their eyes never disconnected as her crop top fell to the floor and his shirt was thrown right on top.

Her breath grew heavier as he pressed her against the counter. His eyes glanced to her lips before pressing them together for the first time in months. It was electrifying to have the familiar taste of one another's lips.

The familiar hands on her hips made her feel right at home, as he pressed closer. She placed her hands on his neck and instinctually ran up to his hair. They kissed slowly as if he were afraid to hurt her.

Adam smiled once pulling away, resting his foreheads on hers. "I missed you." His thumb ran across her bottom lip and she formed a smile.

"I love you." Becky stated in a whisper as her hands went down his neck and chest. There was this relief that ran through her at how easily they transitioned into their comfort zone. There was nothing but love when they kissed or caressed one another. This love is what would help them get through this rough patch.

As she looked into his eyes, Becky knew what she needed to do- what she wanted to do.

"Make love to me."

::

"So is that what the kids nowadays call 'Netflix and chill'?"

Adam grinned at her and she giggled. "Well technically its therapy and chill." She smiled to herself as her back was towards him; he was embracing her from behind.

They fell silent for a few seconds as he pushed her hair from her shoulder in order to kiss her bare skin, then slowly leaving lingering kisses to the middle of her back. Her back arched just the slightest as she exhaled out a breath. Her hand rested on top of his that rested right beneath her breast. She almost made the move to push for another round of intimacy but he spoke up before she could.

"Why now, love? Not that I don't mind it, I'm just curious." He mumbles against her shoulder before looking over to see her eyes.

She turned around in his embrace and came face to face with him. "You're curious about everything..." She ran her fingers along his collarbone and she thought of the right way of answering. "I love you and the fact that I held back on the actual sex was always a question I had myself, you know? I guess I loved the whole idea of passionate, love making the same day we married and made our vows but after our first time a year ago I always wanted to do it again."

"Really? You always said no when I asked."

"I know because I wanted to save the moment. But after your whole rendezvous with other people it didn't mean as much anymore to wait. You had given yourself up to different people before I really gave myself to you… and I regret that. The mere thought the last person you were intimate with was you know who made me upset. I wanted you all to myself; I wanted to experience it all with you. The fact they had experienced that with you and not me just wasn't right."

Adam took it all in and knew where she was coming from. Especially that they weren't longer engaged, she wouldn't have an idea of when that wedding night would be. He also felt resentment pass through him that he put himself in bed with other women when he wanted to experience Becky.

"I love you and that's what's different from what we just did and what I did with the other girl. I took my time and took in all your touches and expressions." He ran the tip of his finger along her cheekbone and smiled at her as he settled his head more into the pillow. "And it was kind of funny how I couldn't figure out how to open the condom wrapper."

Becky laughed and shook her head. "We'll get better at it, practice does make perfect." She stated with a grin and leaned over to kiss his bottom lip ever so gently, barely pulling away.

"Does that mean we can do it again, like now?"

::

"Well now you can buy the pads and I can buy the condoms."

Adam laughed at Becky's dry joke and she smiled at his light laughter.

They walked hand in hand at the grocery store as they came to buy some items for a simple dinner. Adam had run out of groceries and wanted to prepare her something nice. Becky also noted he had to buy some condom's if he were serious about 'practice makes perfect.'

"I never once thought I would have to do this, honestly." Adam looked at the variety of brands and squinted his face up in confusion. Becky glanced at him and took into account his casual tone but knew he meant his words in sincerity. The fact he could possibly have biological children continued to blow his mind whenever the topic was brought up. It was very slim but no matter that, he was excited at the possibility.

The only downside now was that they had to be prepared no matter the low probability of getting pregnant. There was no way Becky would risk getting pregnant when she had yet to graduate. Once the wedding night came, she knew she would dispose of any protection because she wanted children as soon as she was settled in a house with Adam.

"What are you doing?" Becky eyes looked at his phone screen as he texted away. She giggled with amusement as he looked up the best brand.

"I just want you to be satisfied, babe." He smiled at her teasingly and she couldn't look away from his gaze.

"Stop that."

"Stop what?"

Becky shook her head with a smile, as he knew exactly what he was doing. He could be such a tease as much as she could. "Did you figure out which to buy or are we going to stand here forever?"

"Someone's in a rush to get back to bed." Adam laughed softly once she rolled her eyes.

* * *

_well well well, they finally did the deed! hehe. enjoy the two chapters since i have no idea when i will update next. but next chapter will be their anniversary. xx_


	61. Forgetful

"So it's been five years?"

Becky was with Christina and Leslie having lunch. It was a Thursday and all of them were free for the first time in a while. They had come to plan their usual spring break getaway since they were always the best at planning, the boys just tagging along to their plans. Their chatter had drifted to Becky's anniversary day, which happened to be today.

"Yeah, pretty crazy right?" Becky smiled softly as she sipped her smoothie.

"Definitely, five years is a long time." Leslie took a mouthful of salad and glanced over to Christina, whom had a pensive look. Even if all of them shared a trust with one another, both Christina and Leslie had confided in one another that Becky with Adam was always a crazy roller coaster. At times they felt like it wasn't right but at the same time they did see how they would be right together.

It was something they would never mention to her because it would devastate Becky to learn that her two closest friends believe her relationship isn't the healthiest. As little as Becky wished to not let judgments bother her, it wasn't true- Christina and Leslie knew this. If they opened up about this, it would hurt and bother her.

So silence was key.

"Do you have any plans? Half a decade calls for celebration." Christina asked while swirling her spaghetti through her fork, "Honestly, why are you even here? I would of thought you'd be going at it like bunny rabbits."

Becky rolled her eyes with a grin, "I didn't stay over last night. I had work to do and by the time I was free, he was asleep." Her nights staying over were still not a constant thing, it would happen only three times a week since she had become so custom to staying at her house.

"When do you guys plan on moving in together?"

"I'm not sure, we're still taking it a step at a time. I don't want to rush him into anything and honestly I like the place we're in..." She paused and fiddled with the rings on her fingers. "I don't want to push him too far, again."

Leslie dabbed at her mouth to wipe away salad dressing and couldn't help but say what came to mind. "You can't push your desires away, Becky, just because you're afraid he'll fall over the edge."

Her dark blue eyes met with her dark brown eyes and she saw a ping of guilt pass through Becky's eyes. It was clear Becky held resentment for what she had put Adam through and the selfishness she displayed during engagement. "He's a grown man, he can take care of himself and own up to his actions." Christina added with some hesitance.

"I have the instinct to take care of him, girls. He takes care of everyone but himself." Becky defended her boyfriend's actions and fell on the defense as her friends just stared at her. "I can't say more than that without getting too personal."

They nodded in agreement. It always occurred to them that Adam wasn't extremely open about his personal life to them. Their group of friends did know that he was trans and bullied in high school, but other than that it was a mystery. They had no knowledge about ex-girlfriends, friends at home, heck they didn't even know what his parents did for a living.

Becky understood his privacy, even if she would openly speak of their relationship to Christina and Leslie. She would tell them anything that would occur in the relationship but when it came to Adam's personal life, her lips were sealed. Brian was one of the only he confided in along with Rico from time to time.

The only thing that really bothered Becky was how open he was with Courtney, the girl he had hooked up with. They were really close best friends and had sex. It would always annoy her since her boyfriend seemed to have a connection with the tall brunette but there wasn't anything she could do about his past actions.

She was just happy he no longer spoke to her.

"On a lighter note, what present did you get him?"

::

"Well hello stranger. Nice hair."

Courtney perked a brow up at she spotted Adam at a picnic table near the recreational building. It was a spot they usually hung out at and did homework together. She had come here every so often after they ended their rendezvous of hookups, and surprisingly this was the first time they had been here at the same time.

Adam looked up and forced a small smile, "uh, hey." He removed his headphones and watched as she sat across from him. "I'll get going." He began to pile up his things but she told him to stop.

"Why don't you speak to me anymore?" He didn't say anything and she rolled her eyes. "I know we hooked up but it shouldn't affect our friendship. We promised ourselves we wouldn't let that happen." She sighed, as she grew a little tense under his gaze. It was obvious he had slowly pulled away from her and distanced himself ever since he started dating Becky again.

"Becky wasn't involved then and now she is. So I can't be around you..."

"So I was used as a security blanket?"

Adam shook his head and noticed as she began to grow upset. It was weird whenever she did, as she was always calm and collected around him and their peers. It was only at one instance that he had seen her emotionally upset and that was during a documentary on animal cruelty. "I didn't plan on using you."

"But you did, Adam. You're no better than any other guy who has random hook ups to fill that void." She stood up frantically, as she was growing angry. Courtney had trusted him emotionally and physically. The sex they had hadn't pulled her closer to him but the way he was acting towards now showed a side of him she never witnessed. "I never knew you could be so cold."

"Look, I care about you but I care for Becky more. I can't risk losing her by having you in my life! I chose who I wanted and it wasn't you." Adam began to pack his stuff and put on his headphones. "I'm sorry."

He walked off without a regret. It was tough to pick and choose whom to be in your life but it was something he had become used to doing now as an adult. He chose to exclude his bio dad out of his life, he chose whom to talk to from high school after college, he chose what he wanted and what he didn't and Courtney was just another person who was there for a purpose for a certain extent of time.

It didn't mean Adam felt no regret for treating her the way he did, but he knew better than to wallow in pity. As he approached Becky, he knew he had made the right choices and decisions even some he did regret. But he had her and that's all that mattered.

"Hi." Adam embraced her in a big hug once he was close enough and kissed her cheek.

Becky had just finished her last class for the day and was excited to get started on their anniversary plans, hoping Adam had some. "You look handsome." She mumbled as she pulled him in for a kiss.

His heart flipped with joy at their natural affection. He never took for granted her intimacy and adoration for him, so when he was absent of it for months he was happy they were back to kissing and hugging plus some.

"And you look _hot." _Adam grinned with glee as she rolled her eyes. "Too bad I can't see you for the rest of the day, I have to work to do." They had moved to sit beneath a tree. The heat wave was coming soon as winter was ending. Even in this season, he was able to wear shorts, as she was able to wear dresses.

Becky furrowed her brows in confusion. "Why are you working today?"

"Because it's a Thursday and I work on Thursdays?" Adam answered in a question. She knew his schedule just as well as he knew hers. "I also work at the radio station, if you have forgotten that too."

Adam teased with a grin as he began to open up his textbook that he had been highlighting when Courtney interrupted beforehand. She gazed at him, had he forgotten? He was never one to forget a date, but now as she saw him reading his textbook she noticed the failure of white roses in his hand-something he would always give to her on their anniversary.

Becky realized he did forget.

She felt herself grow upset at this even if it wasn't too big of a deal, but with their relationship being in such a tough place before she had expected a little more. But nope, he was focused on his textbook and eating his apple.

Adam glanced over to his quiet girlfriend who was clicking away on her phone. "Are you going to come over tonight?" She looked up and for a second felt a smile on her face, maybe she was wrong. "I'll be home late and once I'm there I'll only be studying."

_Yeah, he forgot _Becky thought to herself.

::

"I don't know… it just bothers me. He never forgets." Becky vented to Christina as she watched her friend put on a slick black dress. "I celebrate his birthday then he celebrates our anniversary. That's how it's always been."

Christina couldn't help but roll her eyes, "Becky, it's not too big of a deal. Like he said, it's a Thursday! Maybe it's just become less of a deal for him since it has been five years."

"So, he just doesn't care?"

"No... I don't know. Maybe it did just slip his mind, like you've said he's been busy. There's lacrosse, school, his job, therapy, and you."

Becky pushed back her hair and looked outside the dorm window. It was pitch black out and she was headed to a party at a local house. "I guess you're right."

They headed out arm in arm and found themselves glancing at the fraternity houses. "I wonder why we never joined one? Look how close all the girls are!"

One of Becky's greatest regrets is not joining a sorority. All the people in one, she got along with, and she fit the basic personality type of being chipper and being a blonde helped too.

"How about the fact that some are really annoying?!"

They laughed together and eventually found the house; it was pretty obvious by the noise level. What caught Christina's ear was the voice of someone on a microphone. "Becky, listen."

The blonde was caught off guard when her friend shook her and she did as she was told. It was Adam's voice. Christina followed as Becky made her way through the crowd and saw Adam in the backyard on the microphone.

"Again, your campus radio is at Patron Way. Open mic for anyone to host."

Adam brought the red cup to his lips as someone took control of the radio. It was smart to do this, almost an excuse to attend a party after so long. But it was very popular with everyone at the party. He was distracted as someone spoke about dolphins to him that he didn't notice Becky approaching.

"Becky, hey!" He greeted her casually and it faulted noticing the expression on her face. The random knew better and moved away as Becky ignored their presence. Christina had also walked off, knowing not to be a witness to their argument—Becky would tell her about it later, anyways.

She had no choice but move closer to him since they stood next to the radio connection. Her mouth was right by his ear, "You said you were working tonight?"

"I am, I told you this idea weeks ago." Adam signaled to the radio stand in front of them both. Becky's back was to it and she didn't bother to look at it. It was undeniable that she was mad but he didn't know why. "What is it?"

"You preferred to this than to be with me?" Becky licked her lips and looked at him with puppy eyes, still being able to pull off a disappointed look even if she were angry.

"Wait, wh-"

"It's our anniversary, Adam! And you're here at this party instead of enjoying a night with me. Why?" It was evident in her eyes that she was hurt and he could tell. It had honestly slipped his mind, as he was excited about this opportunity to move the station outside his radio at school.

He looked away for a brief second and closed his eyes, "I just forgot, okay? I was focused on this-"

"Are you drinking?" Only now she noticed the cup in his hand and she snatched it out of him, instantly smelling the alcohol. The anger drifted to disappointment. He had been consumed about the idea of finally going to party that he pushed her to be second.

"Look, I'm sorry." He reached for her hand but she shook her head, moving away. "This was a chance for me to catch a break and to do my job. The idea was actually approved so I took it, I hadn't noticed it was our day!"

Becky looked at him with an unreadable expression. It was rare for him to not understand what she was thinking but this was one of them.

"Have a nice night." With that, Becky walked away from him. She knew this conversation would go nowhere since he probably intoxicated in some way and having an argument at a party was never a smart idea.


	62. Making Up Under The Sheets

Adam was extremely confused when he woke up seeing Becky in his living room the morning after. She was talking to Brian as if nothing had happened the night before.

"Becks?"

The blonde looked up to him with a smile, "Morning, you're up earlier than I thought." Her demeanor was so normal it was weird to him. She was never this calm after an argument. She wouldn't even be at his place.

Brian smirked at how confused his friend seemed to be. Becky had told him what had happened the night before but she seemed to be over it entirely. Or, she was just a really good liar. It was so hard to tell as Becky had mastered over time how to keep her feelings from rising above the surface. Brian always recalled how expressive she use to be when they first met, but she had changed in a good way.

"Can we talk?"

Adam and Becky went up to his room, Adam having the intention to speak to her but as soon as he shut the door her hands were on him. "Hey, stop, we need to talk." He grabbed her hands in his to keep them off her, immediately let them go as getting physically controlling always made him uncomfortable.

"About what?" Becky raised a brow and smirked. He gave her a pensive look and she sighed, "Oh, that? I'm over it; I don't care. You have your priorities and I have mine- one of them being to take these off." Her hand traveled around the hem of his pajama shorts and she knew she had him where she wanted him.

He gave in so easily to her physical needs that it was a great power move when she needed one. The removal of her clothes and of his made her mind drift. She was no longer upset at his forgetting of their day or of the fact he drank. As their lips connected, she forgets the ache of anger she had with him all those months ago and with last night.

Now as they both lie beneath the covers nude and Adam on top, Becky's eyes watch as he rips a condom wrapper open with his teeth, as her crave for him rises and her anger turns into nothing but passion for him. "I love this about you." Becky whispers out as her hands wander down his bare chest and abdomen.

"What?" Adam asks with a grin on his lips. There's no denying they had something to talk about but right now it was them in their element. The trust and love they had for one another was always displayed whenever they made love.

"How much your love makes me so weak but so strong at the same time." Becky admits as she pulls his head in order to have their lips only inches from one another. "I need you, Adam."

He smiled at her and she returned it as they shared an open mouth kiss, their tongues colliding and he moaned when she bit at his bottom lip. "Come on, big boy, give it to me." Becky smirked at him, as she knew calling him that always gave him an ego boost.

"You got it." He kissed her lips once more before sitting up to align himself. His hands were on her thighs as he pushed himself in, his eyes looking into hers. Their eye contact remained as he leaned forward once more to rest his forehead against hers. "I love you."

Becky gasped out as his hips grinding against hers, "I love you too." She wrapped her legs around his waist and gasped when he entered her. Her hands went around his neck and found her pulling him closer to her, wanting no space between and Adam was happy to oblige. Their eyes met as they let out a moan at the same time, a smile forming at the edge of Becky's lips.

It occurred to her how he never looked away from her gaze as he thrust his hips repeatedly against her. Their moans would continuously match until Adam would lean down to kiss at her neck until eventually his lips were against her breast. She could practically feel the smile on his lips right before he took her nipple into his mouth.

At that moment his hips would slow down as he focused on pampering her chest and she practically cradled his head in her hands. She let out a small squeal when he purposely bit her other nipple and he couldn't help but chuckle at the sound. "Don't laugh at me." Becky whispered out of breathe with a playful grin as he moved back up to rest her forehead against hers.

"I do what I want." Adam said in an almost forceful tone and she found herself licking her lips, growing more turned on at the control and confidence he had. She more than often would be in control but as he grabbed her thighs, somehow managing to pull her closer to him, and kept a strong grip on her side, she knew he would dominant in this case.

Their kissing continued as he thrust into her again, moving fast but pumping in as deep as he could into her. Her hands gripped tightly on his hips and he knew to slow down just the slightest once her moaning came in louder increments, "Oh god, just like that, Adam." She pleaded to him between breaths and closed her eyes while tilting her head back.

This left her neck exposed and his lips latched onto her skin. He groaned out when a few of her nails seemed to seep into his skin and he felt that deep form of pleasure forming at the pit of his stomach. "I'm going to cum, baby." Adam mumbled and moved his head, as he desired to look at her when he reached his climax.

"Go faster, bring me with you." Becky sighed and he obliged. Adam tensed after a few thrusts later but had no intention to stop as Becky's toes curled and her back arched—he wouldn't fail on doing what she wanted. She reached bliss as she gasped and her body felt her orgasm pass through. She shuddered beneath him and knew he had came just a few seconds after her as leaned down to press his body against hers and tensed in her arms.

"Oh, fuck." Adam mumbles against her ear a moment later. Becky let out a soft moan, finally letting his body relax once his weight moved off her. He disposed of the condom and immediately went under the covers to pamper her chest with kisses. His head was hidden beneath the sheets and Becky's eyes fluttered closed when his lips moved down her stomach.

"What are you—Ahh." Becky cut off her question once she felt him kiss her sensitive clit. She reached behind her to grip onto her pillow and sighed with a smile as he took his time between her legs, eventually she let out a loud moan in his name when he brought her to another climax.

Coming to see him in the morning, she knew there was no better way to handle this situation than this. Now as he lied besides her, she knew she had made the right decision. There so denying she enjoyed the way he made her feel in bed since he knew just _what _to do to make her feel on top on the world and feel so loved and admired; even if he did forget their anniversary.

Her fingertips ran gently across his chest as her eyes wandered down his thin body. She could feel his eyes on her and his fingers messing with her hair. "Your nipples look so nice." Becky commented with a grin and Adam laughed.

"Well, I did have them professionally done." Adam quipped. Their eyes met and he suddenly remembered something. "I have something to give you." A smile was on his lips and he got out of bed, her eyes lingered to his butt as he looked through the top of his closet. She slowly sat up, the sheets covering her chest, and noticed the small box in his hands.

She felt a nervous but excited panic as she realized it had to hold a ring. "Adam, are you...?"

He sat quietly besides as he fidgeted with the box in his hands. "I..." Adam paused and he met her eyes, who shown excitement. It helped calm his nerves. "I've had this planned for a while, Becky, trust me. I didn't forget our day but at the same time I did."

"Adam."

"Right, okay." She watched with a soft smile as she could see how nervous he was acting. Her mind hadn't been in the mindset to be engaged to him but now as he held the box in his hands, it was something she wouldn't say no to. "Take it."

Becky furrowed her brows. "That isn't very traditional."

He looked at her with an amused grin and raised an eyebrow. "I'm not proposing, babe. Well I sort of am. It's a ring if you haven't guessed but I sealed it with a small key, that I hid somewhere in your room."

She twiddled with the box and noticed she couldn't open it. "So you want me to not see it?"

"I want you to open it when you feel ready to be with me." Adam finally confessed, as he looked her in the eyes. He could note her confusion off the bat and reached up to push her hair away. "We both know you're not on that level of trust we had before, therapy has shown me this. But I am fully committed to you, you're my soul mate Becky and I'm ready this time to be engaged to you when you're ready. So I know when you are ready to take that step with me, you'd look for the key."

"Why do you assume I'm not ready now?" Becky countered with a devious smirk.

"Because if you were ready, you would have tried to open it the moment I handed it to you."

The raw honesty in his voice made her smile slowly faint. He was right, she hadn't even thought of opening it until he had mentioned the key. But it was also killing her to see how the ring looked and to just slip it on her finger. The first ring he had given her, she knew was a family heirloom and she had kept it. This made it certain this ring was something he had picked out just for her. "When I see the ring on your finger I'll know and I can't wait for that day to come."

She felt the corner of her eyes begin to swell with tears. It was so much sentiment and thought into a gift that she knew her gift to him was nothing compared to this. "I'm sorry I was so mad at you. Come here." She brought him in for a kiss and quickly deepened it while wrapping her arms around his neck, pulling him close that he had to shift his body to practically be on top of her.

"What you get me?" Adam asked with a playful smile and she cracked a small chuckle.

"A surfboard."

* * *

_Another two chapters, amazing ! hope you guys enjoy and this is the first M-rated chapter in a while ;) _

_i've just realized that I'm on chapter 62 and if you go to my very first chapter i said i hoped this story didn't pass 30, but yet here i am writing more than 60 chapters and it is still continuing. i honestly don't think this story will reach chapter 100-i am slowly running out of ideas for them to do since i've done mainly everything you could think of drama wise. i feel like most of the next and final chapters will just be them being together as a happy couple and talking about their future._

_i can't promise how many more chapters there will be because again I'm running out of things to write. since becky is staying another semester, there is a possibility i will include some summer chapters but not a lot. i know a few more things i need to write is a birthday chapter since i have not done one yet! of course i will have a chapter of adam's graduation &amp; then becky's. the next coming chapters will be their last spring break so if you have any ideas for that let me __know!_

_just know the remainder of the story will most likely be on a lighter note-graduation, vacation, engagement, and of course the marriage (which i am not too sure if i will write.) enjoy and review! xx_


	63. Spring Break II: Part I

"I can't believe you're _finally_ in Florida!"

Adam was filled with glee as he spoke to his spring break visitor. He had just picked up his brother from the airport and knew it was going to be one hell of a spring break.

"I can't either, bro. Man, there are so many hot chicks here." Drew had his window rolled down and smiled at a girl walking along side the car, which stood at a red light.

The younger Torres smirked and sped off once the light was green, "Don't forget who your number one lady is back home."

Drew nodded with a small smile. "I can't wait when you can finally meet her. I would bring her to your graduation but Vicky won't be okay with that... I did bring a whole pack of pictures for you to keep!"

"Becky will love to see those. The fact you have a baby makes her want a baby more, good job doing that to me, Andrew." Adam quipped and Drew hollered out in laughter. He was aware Adam had a chance to have kids but boy it was slim.

"Mom can't wait for you to have kids too, she loves being a grandmother." Drew didn't falter on calling Audra his mom, even if the divorce had been finalized for a year now. "How are you and Becky?"

He lowered the volume of the radio as he thought. It was nice to have his brother here beside him and it was nice to have these personal conversations face to face than over the phone. Maybe that's why Becky decided to go with their friends right to the beach house than tag along with Adam. "I think we're pretty good. She isn't mad at me anymore for being, well-"

"Stupid." Drew finished the sentence for him and grinned at Adam's stern expression.

"Basically. Therapy helped a little but it's not something I want to keep doing, I think we're past that."

"And only like married couples who are on the verge of divorce or who don't have sex do therapy." Drew generalized and Adam nodded in agreement. "What about the ring, has she worn it yet?"

Adam shook his head silently.

There was a huge desire for her to one-day wear the ring but he knew not to pressure her in anyway. Adam wished for them to be engaged again but knew it was now his turn to wait for Becky to be ready. He hadn't brought the ring up ever since he gave it to her, since he knew doing so would only make her seemed pressure to say yes.

"Hey, she'll put it on eventually. In the mean time, you can be my wing man." Drew suggested and Adam scoffed. "Are any of your friends hot?"

::

Leslie couldn't help but show a bright smile at the hot guy hugging Becky.

She had seen Drew in pictures before, but he gave off this great energy in person that she could feel right as he stepped in the door.

"Everyone this is Drew, my brother." Adam announced and they all said a 'hello' in unison. Drew's eyes settled on the light skinned Latina and Leslie almost melted at the sight of his blue eyes, which were just as light as Adam's.

"Where are the baby pictures?!" Becky plopped down on the couch next to Leslie and Drew dug through his suitcase.

"Adam was right, you're more excited than he is for these." Drew smiled wide and pulled up the rocking chair next to Becky as he opened the envelope.

Brian came down the stairs and greeted Drew in a formal handshake, "What's up, man? Shit, you got tan."

"Fucking hilarious." Brian sarcastically replied, as his skin was already naturally brown. "Oh man, she's adorable. Can't say she looks like her father."

"Aw, no, she looks just like him." Becky countered and her friends were amused at the failure to sense sarcasm at this time.

Adam joined the small group of friends after talking to Christina, Rico, and Alex who were outside. He came in hand with a beer, knowing Drew would want one. "How's she look?" The teen sat on the small table that was in front of the couch then pulled up a little, just enough that his knee bumped with Becky's.

Leslie's eyes watched as the two brothers interacted with Becky and instantly spotted their differences. Off the bat, Drew came off as more immature but still made the same fair amount of jokes as Adam; even though Adam was wittier. Becky and Drew already had a brother-sister relationship going on, making it almost impossible to believe Drew at one point felt something for Becky.

Eventually, the friends around them left, as they knew they should let the brothers, plus Becky, have their own time.

"Who was that?" Drew questioned as he gestured to Leslie. "She is _hot."_

Becky gasped in amusement. She had instantly forgotten that Drew in fact was still single even with a baby in the picture. "No, you will not hook up with my friend!"

Drew held his hands up innocently and Adam chuckled. He knew for a fact Drew wouldn't back off.

::

"Well, he likes you."

Becky admitted to Leslie as they were doing their make up in the master bedroom, that Adam and Becky shared.

"Damn it, if only he saw me first." Christina teased as she did her mascara. "Leslie attracted to a baby daddy, who knew? And to think you just dumped your boyfriend of two years."

Leslie groaned at the mention of her failed relationship. "I need a hook up to get over it. He is definitely going to be it." She messed with her curls to get the right volume. "Think he'll be any good?"

"Ew, I'm still here! He's like my brother." Becky made a face of disgust as she rested against the wall. She was always the first one done as her make up was minimal and hair was easy to style.

"Could be your brother if you wear that ring." Christina implied and side eyed the blonde. "What are you waiting for anyways? Think Adam's going to screw up or something?"

Becky squinted her eyes and knew better than to take her words seriously. They had taken pre game shots and knew Christina could get very blunt when she was drunk. "He said to take my time."

Leslie jumped when Christina slammed down her perfume bottle to get Becky's attention. "Becky, he just said that to make you feel better. He's probably dying to see it on your hand soon."

"And what's so wrong with that?" Becky quickly fired back.

"Christina, don't." Leslie tried to stop Christina from saying anything she would regret but knew it was a lost cause when she wouldn't look away from the blonde.

"He's manipulative! He gives you a ring knowing very well you can't say no because you love him too much. And then he decides to lock it up and tells you to find a key? Jesus, it's like he _wants _to make it more difficult to make you frustrated for that key. He wants you to go begging to him for that key so he can have some sort of power."

Becky felt a lump in her throat at her harsh words. Her friends had never spoken badly of her boyfriend but now as Christina spoke her thoughts and Leslie said nothing; she knew it wasn't something they hadn't thought of before.

"You don't understand our relationship so don't even dare say stuff like that. You have no right!"

"We have a right, especially when you were a zombie for a month then crying for another-"

"Christina, shut up!" Leslie intervened, making the focus on her this time. "Becky, we all have opinions and you're our friend. We don't want you to feel as bad as those months had been, we don't want you hurt again!"

It was flabbergasting to her at how she was unaware to her friend's thoughts. Their words stung, as they perceived her as weak and as Adam as some sort of manipulator. Silence filled the air and it was so thick that when Brian joined them with a smile, it faltered.

"Um...Are we ready?"

"You know what? I tell you both everything but it gives you no reason to judge me. I'm not this flimsy girl who doesn't know what she wants!"

"We aren't saying that!" Leslie fired back as they completely ignored Brian's presence and he had to step back, knowing it was not his business. "Just Adam has a hold over you that you fail to see."

"Adam knows how to control you." Christina made it clear and Leslie groaned in frustration, as her words didn't help. "Simple as that."

Her blue eyes pierced at her so called friends and knew she was at the brink of tears from this form of betrayal. She knew she couldn't stick around but she needed to have her final word in, "I know how to control him. You both fail to see that I have the power in this situation by choosing to marry or not marry him. He falls right down to his knees at my _very_ say don't you think for a slight second you understand our dynamic. And by the way, I found the key weeks ago in my bible on my favorite verse."

Becky quickly left the room, even if it were her own, and found Adam downstairs looking concerned as Brian spoke to him. Drew stood next to him and looks as puzzled as ever. It was his first night here and there was already drama.

"Ready?" Becky didn't let her emotions fault her appearance and Adam furrowed his brows at her demeanor.

::

"What's going on between you three?"

Adam and Becky were standing outside as their group of friends sat at the table. Their first night, they would always attend dinner together as a group since the remainder of the break they most than likely did things on their own means. The only couple on the trip were standing in front of the restaurant building, making an excuse that they needed some air.

It was clear to Adam that their was some tension between the three girls on the trip, which made extremely awkward when the group tried to strike conversation.

Becky tilted her head back in frustration with a groan, "It was a petty argument Christina started." She puckered her lips as she contemplated whether or not to tell him right now. She didn't want Adam to be stuck in the middle of it and to create any more tension than needed. Brian hadn't let Adam know exactly what he had walked in on and Becky was grateful for this since it was something she should reveal to him on their own time.

"Want to tell me about it?" Adam questioned as he held her hand in his own.

"I want to but... I don't want it to hurt you." Becky let her hand escape from his and she reached up to run her fingers through his hair. It was as long as it had been their last year of high school and it crossed her mind to remind him to cut it soon. She felt his eyes just stare at her and she exhaled, knowing very well she couldn't keep this from him.

She spoke to him in a soft manner, loud enough for only them two to hear. She explained what had been said and how she had felt. As she did this, his expression was neutral the whole time just letting her vent. When Becky finally stopped talking, Adam let it sink in that her-no, _their, _friends had perceived such a bad perception of him. It stung just the slightest but it was no surprise they had that attitude towards him.

"Well, it's no surprise how direct Christina can be when she's drunk." He joked and Becky smiled softly, knowing he would try to brush this off with humor. "People have opinions."

"Yeah, people, not friends who I've known for almost four years." Becky bit the inside of her cheek as she looked towards the street before looking back at him. "I don't like it, you're my partner they can't judge you like that. I know I let them know a lot about us but they don't know you in the way that I do."

Adam smiled softly as her hands moved up his chest and around his neck. Physical comfort always soothed him, even if he didn't know just how to feel about this. "Well thanks for standing up for me, I appreciate it." He spoke sincerely and Becky had a wide smile before kissing his lips so softly.

"I love you." Becky whispers against his lips right before Adam's phone rings. "Looks like the food is ready."

* * *

_an update for you all! sorry for taking forever but heres a lengthy chapter. can't promise when i will update next but enjoy and tell me what you think! xx_


	64. Spring Break II: Part II

"Well, hello."

Christina looked up as Adam greeted her and she forced a small smile. She felt a slight panic, as she already knew he would dive right into it.

"Hey there. You're not hung over?"

"I didn't drink." Adam replies before taking a sip of his coffee. It was early in the morning and he was surprised to see Christina up at this time. He saw it as the perfect opportunity to talk to her since the rest of their roommates were asleep, including Becky.

"Can't say the same about your brother." She quipped and he let out a small laugh. Adam would be surprised if Drew wasn't in the same bed with Leslie since he had drunk so much.

Adam cleared his throat as he set down his drink and looked at Christina as her eyes focused on the shore. They sat at the small table on the front porch, so he easily smelled the ocean breeze. "Becky told me what you said." The ease and relaxation of the scenery quickly fell as she saw her tense up.

"Look, I didn't mean what I said. I was slightly buzzed and PMS'ing so I had no filter." It was weird to have this confrontation with him. It made her feel almost…uncomfortable. Adam was a nice guy who was always sweet to her and Leslie. Christina pulled up her knees to her chest, as Adam stayed quiet.

His eyebrows rose but quickly fell back to a neutral position. "The least you could do is stick with your word. I totally understand if you see me as this intolerable, manipulative, uncontrollable guy because in a way I am; I can admit it. I honestly don't care about what you said."

Christina instantly looked into his eyes with confusion. "Then why are we-"

"Because you hurt Becky." Adam sat up straight and tapped his finger on his coffee mug as he collected his thoughts. "Becky trusts you and Leslie with everything, including the private details of our relationship. Then she learns that you had secret thoughts and feelings towards me, that it hurt her. She honestly has no idea how to handle it because she's never been hurt by a close friend."

"Everyone has opinions, Adam, we just keep them secret just like I had because of that sole reason of not wanting to hurt her or you."

Adam shook his head, growing slightly defensive as he had a natural instinct to protect his girlfriend and himself. "You aren't friends with people that you have negative ideas of. You don't like me, Christina; it's plain and simple. You don't because I hurt her but it gives you no right to voice an opinion like that towards her. I don't care if you were so called drunk; you never do that again. I don't care if you talk smack about me as long as it's not in front of her because how she feels is the only thing I care about."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize to me. Apologize to Becky, the girl who has been your friend for four years."

She had never seen him so defensive and protective over anyone. It was a side Becky mentioned every so often but it was clear it was a side he only displayed for people he cared for, and Becky was his number one. Christina understood where he was coming from and why he didn't want her apology, but she wouldn't take no for an answer.

"I am sorry. I don't think you're a bad guy; just you made her so sad Adam. It was physically painful to witness a friend like that." He looked away for the first time in the whole conversation and she knew she hit a nerve. "I'll talk to her later today."

"Thank you."

It was a moment of silence before she spoke up again, wanting it to be clear between them. "You're my friend, too, Adam. I care for you as much as I care for her and I just want you to know that."

::

"Damn, looking fresh."

Drew purposely ran his fingers through Adam's freshly cut hair, knowing Adam hated it. He laughed when Adam pushed him off. "Now it's only fair that I do that to you."

"No way." Drew backed off with a grin.

They sat in the living room as they waited for Becky. Originally Adam and Drew had planned to just go by themselves but since Becky fought with Christina, she didn't feel right being around her.

"God, how long does she take?" Drew groaned out without notice that Becky was coming down the stairs.

"Well sorry that I actually apply deodorant and lotion, _Andrew,"_ Becky teased him with his full name and he rolled his eyes. Her focus then went to her boyfriend and she smiled in delight at his bright face. "At least you're patient."

Adam smiled as she leaned down to kiss him since he was sitting. He placed her hand on her butt, making her grin into the kiss but quickly pulled away knowing Drew was growing impatient.

Soon enough, they were under the sunrays as they strolled the boardwalk and passed various stores. Drew practically dragged them into a random store that was a tattoo shop. "Bro, no."

Drew couldn't wipe the smirk off his face. "Come on! I've wanted to get a rose for Rosie."

"Are you sure? It's a permanent thing."

Becky furrowed her brows, never knowing Adam was such against tattoos. "It's his body, Adam. What if I want one?"

"He would totally be cool with that." Drew answers for Adam as he glances at the various pictures they have out. Adam nods in agreement with Drew's words. "Told ya."

Adam sighs and knows he's lost the battle once Drew goes behind the desk with an employee. His focus then goes on his girlfriend, curious taking over. "If you were to get one, what would you get?" He hovers over her shoulder and she flips through pages of a tattoo book. She shrugs her shoulder and feels his eyes still on her, waiting on an answer. "I'd honestly get Spider-Man, he's so badass."

"Seriously?" Becky laughs with an amused smile and glances back to him, meeting his eyes briefly. "Probably a cross, somewhere not visible though."

"Mm, where only my eyes can see?" He perks a brow with a smirk and she playfully shakes her head. "Maybe I should tattoo "this belongs to Becky" on my stomach with an arrow pointing down." She shoves him away with amusement and laughs out loud.

Becky finally turns around to face him and finds him flirtatiously close to her. She reaches up to caress his cheeks that are covered with scruff along his jaw. "You're so handsome." She whispered to him softly and she smiled wide when he shyly looked away from her gaze. It was amusing to think he could make jokes about their sexual life but once her gentle comments came along, he would blush. "I remember the cute boy I fell for; a thin boy who was shorter than me with chubby cheeks."

Adam chuckled when she punched his cheeks, "Ow, babe, you're hurting my handsome face." He teased and she giggled as he leaned into her and buried his head into her neck.

"Thanks for being so worried!" Drew popped out from behind the curtain with a teasing smile and his shoulder covered in some sort of paper. "Continue to make out while I groan in agony."

::

Becky finished drying her hands as she stood in the kitchen alone. She had let Adam and Drew go on their own to enjoy the Florida night as they had yet to have their brother time.

Her ears perked up as she heard the door unlock and heard familiar giggles. It was Christina with Leslie. It was strange to be in a drift with both of them since they had never had such an intense argument before. It was probably so tough since it was about Adam and not just her.

"Becky, hey!" Leslie smiled small, a little nervous, as she set her purse down on the kitchen counter. She hadn't expected the blonde to be there since it was pretty early to call it a night. Christina stood there with a stiff stance and looked at Becky and Leslie. It was clear they needed to move past this.

"Is Adam here?" Christina asked as she shook off her jacket. Becky simply shook her head and crossed her arms, knowing their conversation was going to get deeper into thought. "Him and I spoke earlier in the day."

"I know."

Leslie bit her lip as she settled in a seat feeling the air fill with awkwardness. "Okay, we need to stop with the small talk and let it out. Becky, start!" She pointed to the blonde, knowing the best way to direct them was to dictate the conversation. It was almost always her role to be the mediator between the two.

"Fine. It hurt me to know you thought of Adam in that way. I understand _why_ but you shouldn't blow up on me about it or tell me about it because I'm going to defend him no matter what."

Christina nipped at her thumbnail as she leaned her hip against the counter. She had an urge to remove her heels but knew better than to do it mid conversation with Becky. "I know, Becky. I just want to say sorry and move forward from this. We only have so much longer in the semester, we shouldn't be arguing the rest of it."

"I agree." Leslie added and smiled at Becky. "We know you're staying for the summer as well, we have to enjoy this time and the summer before you move on to your life in Canada."

It was bittersweet that their friendship would be long distance after she finishes her last semester in the fall. She'll be going back to the life in Canada, where she was minimal on friends as she failed to keep in contact with anyone but Clare. "You're both forgiven." She smiles at them and Christina smiles with glee as she approaches Becky with a big hug.

"Yay! Friends again." Leslie stood up and put on her jacket. "Now Becky go change so we can grab a midnight dinner, no point in being here."

"You just want to talk about your hook-up with Drew." Christina teased.

"That's gross." Becky couldn't help but make a face. "I rather not!"

* * *

_hope you guys enjoy the simple chapter! sorry its been a while. just noticed my last update was almost exactly a year after publishing the first chapter of this story ! anywhos enjoy xx._


	65. Spring Break II: Part III

Adam reached for his phone to glance at the time and yawned, noticing how early it was. He didn't know what was up with his body that he continued to wake up early in the morning.

Again, to his surprise, Becky was still asleep. He rubbed his eyes with the palm of his hands before scooting closer to his girlfriend and exhaled against her shoulder once she was pressed up against him.

Last night, he had gone to dinner with Drew followed by a club. It was crazy to say the least since he had never gone to a club before. His brother enjoyed it while he just sat at the table, feeling lonesome since Becky hadn't gone with him. He was happy to learn that she had gone out with her friends to a late dinner.

Now thinking about it, it was amusing to him how their old rendezvous years ago during spring break would consist of craziness. It was noticeably calmer now, probably since they were both 22 and were out of that stage of partying.

"Becky." Adam whispered with a smile as he kissed her shoulder. He wanted to wake her up to talk to her or to just kiss her. They hadn't been intimate since the day they got here, probably because there were so many people in the house.

The blonde shifted under his arm as she woke from his continuous kissing on the back of her neck. "Adammm." She groaned out and shifted away from him. "Stop. I'm still half asleep."

"Then let me fully wake you." He flirted and she met his eyes before letting out a small laugh. She turned into her back and his body was half on hers. "How'd you sleep?"

"Is that really what you're worried about?" Becky perked a brow and reached up to stroke his hair. She knew what he had in mind but there was no chance it would happen. "We talked about this, there's _way_ too many people in this house."

Becky sat up in order to get him off her and she stretched her arms above her head. She glanced back at him, his eyes still on her, and leaned over to kiss his lips.

It didn't take much before the gentle kiss she had in mind turned into a make out session.

He was on top, between her legs, and moaned against her lips when she bit his bottom lip. They transitioned to an open mouth kiss where their tongues collided. She felt his hand run up her thigh, beneath her shorts, and she mumbled his name against his lips as she almost pleaded for him to do something.

"Adam! You up yet? Let's get some breakfast." Drew knocked on the door, knowing better than to barge in. He then her a thump almost if something had fallen onto the floor. "Everything okay in there?"

Becky glanced down to Adam who had fallen to the floor after she had pushed him off. She laughed at his annoyed expression. "We're fine! He'll be out in a few."

He got onto his knees and placed his hands on Becky's own knees. "I swear, he has terrible timing."

"Or I was just right in saying no. There's too many people here, Adam! We have no privacy." Becky rubbed Adam's bare arms and felt a tingle between her thighs when she felt his arms flex just the slightest.

"We can get a hotel somewhere."

"What?" Becky looked at him stunned from his suggestion. "Why would we pay for something else when we have this place for free?"

Adam looked up at her and shrugged. "I've been thinking about it for a while. We can get some alone time, something we haven't had since last summer."

Becky smirked as she teased, "That's how much you want to have sex?"

"That too." Adam smiled at her as his hands ran up her thighs. "Hey, I can challenge myself though if you don't want a hotel room. I can try right now to get you off." He teased in a whisper and grinned when Becky looked to the door.

"Drew's waiting."

He slumped, knowing how it's unfair to make his brother wait for who knows how long. "Fine."

::

"You want to know me?"

Adam asked to Christina as they ordered breakfast in a diner. It was them with Becky and Drew, Leslie couldn't make it because she was asleep. In his head, Adam kept reminding himself that Christina told Becky she barely knew him.

And it was true, he did keep a lot of his personal issues private since they were personal. His closer friends knew more about him but with Christina and Leslie, it was different since they were _Becky's_ friends.

"First, I honestly have no idea how you or Becky looked in high school." Christina looked at Becky, who sat next to her, and Adam who was across. Drew sat next to his brother.

"You've never shown her a picture, Becks?" Adam directed towards his girlfriend and she was already on her phone, looking for an old throwback. She smiled to herself when she found one and showed it to her friend.

Christina let out a small chuckle, "Oh my god, you were 17 here? You look so little." Adam simply shrugged with a smile and chuckled. "Becky practically looks the same except the cheeks."

"I'll take that as a compliment." Becky grinned as she showed Drew the picture next. It was one taken for the yearbook as cutest couple.

"Oh shit, I remember this. And to think you guys weren't together when you took this." Drew added and Becky glared at him, Adam watching Becky.

That brief break up was something they always tended to forget about and to never mention. It was rather ridiculous that Adam told Becky to never bring it up, something they had done for the past four years.

"Moving past that..." Adam eyed the food that was coming and the group stayed quiet while being handed their breakfast. He waited a brief second before speaking again. "So our parents are-"

"Divorced." Drew finished for him and he chewed his pancake. "Making us technically not brothers anymore since we were step brothers, but who cares? We pretty much grew up together since he was 4 or 5 and I was a year older."

Christina listened in on their backstory and smiled from time to time at how Drew would fill in the gaps of Adam's stories. It was strange to witness their exchange since she had gone all this time without meeting his brother. "You should of invited your brother to breakfast too."

Becky made a face and noticed she was joking. Luke wasn't too friendly with her friends and vice versa. He was always preoccupied with sports and school, along with church as he committed himself more to his religion over time.

"Another thing to add, Drew and Luke don't like each other." Adam glanced to his brother and waited for him to continue but didn't. "They had an argument a few years ago and never made up."

"Isn't he all about forgiveness though?" Christina directed towards Becky and the blonde shrugged.

"I guess her brother and Becky flipped roles. Becky was super religious when she was in high school." The blonde looked at Drew curiously and noticed how Adam was just focused on his food. "Come on, Becky, you were so intense sometimes no one knew what to say except for Adam."

Her eyes now diverted to Adam who had a small grin on his face and their eyes met, making his grin turn into a smile. "I found her intensity hot!"

"Adam!"

"What? It's true! Ask Drew."

Drew nodded and noticed the pink of Becky's cheeks. "I always tell people the same story when they ask me how I knew you two would stay together for years to come..."

There was a pause where Adam shook his head, already knowing what story he were to mention. Becky squinted her eyes as she had no idea where Drew's mind was heading. "Spill it!" Christina pushed.

"I think it was the day after our party, where Becky came and took these khakis we were burning, Adam was telling me how he followed her to try to get the khakis back... And he said this one thing, it was like, 'Andrew," He begun to mimic Adam's past voice by making it somewhat high pitched, "'She came back to the party and smiled at me and all I wanted to do was give her all the pair of khakis in the world.'"

"Oh my god." Christina couldn't help but smile along with Becky, who's smile radiated from cheek to cheek.

::

Her fingers skimmed across his stomach as she felt the necessity to unbuckle his belt but his lips were too distracting. Whenever they shared an open mouth kiss, Becky felt compelled to follow his lead. His tongue knew just how to explore her mouth and when he tugged on her lower lip with his teeth, he had her in the palm of his hands.

"Adam."

"Yeah, Becky?" He smiled down at her as their bodies were close together. She was lying on her back on the back seats of the car and he felt his desire rush since they had never done anything in the car before.

"We shouldn't do this here..." She mumbled out of breath and felt more heat rise to her face. "We'll probably die of suffocation."

They parked the car only a few blocks away from their beach house, but it wasn't too secluded. With the weather going out outside, the inside of the car had become really warm really fast. "We can open a window."

Adam watched her shake her head and began to sit up. It was frustrating to think they hadn't made love for days now but it was understandable considering the circumstances. Becky opened the car door and stood up, stretching her body as the car was too small for both their tall bodies.

"We really need that hotel room." He sat at the end of the car seats, where she stood outside. He couldn't help but enjoy the smell of the salty air and watch as his girlfriend pushed her hair back. "I can't take it anymore."

Becky let out a small chuckle and shook her head, feeling amused. "Adam, we can survive without sex for a few days." She honestly thought the hotel idea was a little bizarre. Sure they were stuck in a house with other people, but going off to a hotel only to be intimate seemed like a waste of money.

"Why don't you want alone time with me?"

"What are you talking about?"

He bit his lip and looked away from her gaze. It had come to his attention that they hadn't spent any alone time during the spring break, which would be over in a few days. Every time they were together, someone else was with them. "I always ask you if you want to grab a dinner or have a stroll on the beach, but you say no and make up some excuse."

"Excuse? Your brother is here and he wants to spend time with you. I'm always around, Adam." She tensed her jaw as she felt her anger rise at his accusations. "We're alone right now."

"You don't get it."

Becky felt a ping in her heart at those words. They both hated when the other would say something along those terms since they always understood each other at a certain level. She always tried her best to control herself from saying it and Adam would never mutter the words.

This was the first time that he did.

"Forget it." Adam saw how she had zoned out just the slightest and decided to stand up. "You can drive the car back; I'm going for a walk."

* * *

_hello! sorry for the long wait and hope you enjoy._

_side note: anyone watched the new season of degrassi? I'm totes head over heels for grace &amp; zoe, i'm actually considering writing a one shot for them of some sort but not a hundred percent sure since i can't even keep up with my current stories._


	66. Spring Break II: Part IV

"I can't believe I'm leaving tomorrow. These four days passed by so quickly." Drew took another sip of his beer as he spoke to his brother.

"I know. I felt like we didn't even do anything."

"Well isn't that the point?" Adam laughed and shrugged. Drew couldn't help but drape his arm over his brother's shoulders as they waited in line to the entrance of a party. "I can't wait for you to go back home in May."

Adam glanced over to his brother and opened his mouth to speak but couldn't formulate the words. He had yet to tell Drew he would be staying until December for Becky. It was only difficult because he knew how he was Drew's support system since his parents were divorced and Dallas had moved.

The only friends Drew had where from work, and all of them he couldn't trust.

"I can't wait to meet Rosie." Adam smiled, changing the subject. "I can't believe your baby momma agreed to bringing her here for my graduation. A crying child in the car, no thank you!"

At that moment, their friends approached with Becky behind. She found their earlier disagreement very random and out of place. It was strange for him to push her away as they had moved past that for a while now.

Her eyes met his as he let Leslie take his place next to his brother. Adam smiled at her just the slightest and she returned the grin, happy he wasn't completely angery with her.

"Hey." Adam wrapped his arm around her waist while she greeted him with a tender kiss to the lips. He couldn't help but pull her closer to him once they pulled away. "We should talk."

All the blonde did was nod before diverting her attention to their friends as they stood in line. It was only a few more moments before they were let into the club and Becky knew the only place to have some form of privacy was going to be on of the nastiest. Their friends went to the direction of the bar as Becky led her boyfriend to the back of the club. She was grateful that there wasn't any security.

"I'm sorry for what I said."

Adam started as they shut the bathroom door. He was grateful it was a single bathroom and that it wasn't gross as he expected it to be, like the ones in the movies.

"Then why'd you say it?" Becky leaned against the sink and took in the sight of her boyfriend. Earlier, she couldn't help but think of when they were in high school and compare it to now. He looked so mature but his eyes still stayed with the youthful hope they held.

"I don't know." Adam licked his lips, thinking he should let his feelings slide but quickly backtracked and shook his head. "Actually, I do know. I feel as if you're pushing away from me and don't want to be around me by yourself."

"Adam, that's no-"

"Becky, I'm not blind." She closed her mouth and took in his expression. She shook her head not wanting him to continue talking but he did anyways. "If you're not satisfied with me say so."

Her blue eyes closed for a second and she sighed, "It's not that I'm not satisfied."

"Then what is it? I can work on it." His eyes pierced through her as he felt dismay of her indirectness. They were always honest with one another and always on the same level of what they desire in their relationship. He was about to push a little more but she spoke before he could, thankfully.

"It's always the same thing." Becky bit her lip as his expression turned into a confused one. "It's always in our bedroom, you on top first then me on top and that's it. It just bores me sometimes." She looked away for a second as she gulped. There was some truth to what she was saying as she covered the true reason behind her distance with him.

Adam blinked a few times as he leaned against the bathroom stall, "But you always seem to enjoy it."

Becky couldn't meet his eyes at those words and he tensed his jaw. "Why wouldn't you just tell me?"

"Because of this!" She motioned to his tense body language and the amount of distance between them. She knew when it came to his body and their intimacy, it was a sensitive topic because of the dysphoria and low self esteem he had at times. "I didn't want to hurt your feelings."

"At least you're being honest now." Adam scratched his head and let out a loud breath. He had no idea how to process this so he did what he did best, walk away.

::::

"It's so weird."

Becky spoke to Christina and Leslie on the porch as they watched Adam and Drew play football on the beach. It was nice to have a firsthand view of her boyfriend being athletic but she noticed something was off-well wasn't off, literally.

"He hasn't bothered kissing me at all this morning or last night, he was on his phone just reading about a video game! Now he doesn't even have his shirt off while on the beach."

"I mean; you probably did hurt his feelings." Leslie added with a shrug. "Some guys can't handle it."

"Like Drew." Christina smirked and Becky looked wide eyed with confusion. "Tell her."

Leslie shook her head and groaned. "He _sucks_ in bed." Christina couldn't help but laugh at her misery and Becky made a face of disgust, but sat up straight in her chair as she grew more interested.

"Didn't you sleep with him twice?"

Christina nodded for her but Leslie explained, "I was drunk the first time so it was whatever, but yesterday, god it was awful. He was so into himself." She was whispering, in hope no one would hear what she was saying. "And I made it obvious that I didn't like what he was doing and he got really upset."

Becky furrowed her brows, "Drew is one of those guys who would talk a big game."

"Maybe their failure to please is a Torres thing." Leslie added with a shrug. It was rather disappointing since she found Drew very attractive and nice to talk to, but their sexual compatibility wasn't there.

"Adam knows what he's doing, trust me. He's the least selfish person in bed." Becky tapped her fingers on her glass of juice and found her eyes going to her boyfriend who was talking to Drew.

Christina glanced to Adam and nodded, "It's just repetitive? That makes sense since you've been with him for five years now."

Becky sighed and felt compelled to find a solution. It was a sudden thing that she felt unpleased with what he was doing in bed. "Maybe I'm just overreacting. I've been a little stressed..." Her voice drifted as another issue sprouted into her mind once again.

"Probably because you haven't had an orgasm." Christina wittily answered with a laugh and Becky rolled her eyes.

::

Adam clicked through the radio stations in order to find a song he tolerated. They were all pre-set to pop stations, thanks to Becky.

"What time is he going to land?" Becky questioned as she tried to start conversation with him. "I know the trip can be a little long."

"About 7. I told him to text when he's there."

Becky bit her lip, noticing the disinterest in his tone. The whole day he had been bluntly avoiding her until now where he had to talk to her since Drew was gone. It felt a little sad to see his brother go since he always brought a fun energy out of Adam.

"I know you're upset by what I said but you can't push me away because of it."

"I'm not pushing you away." Adam glanced at her while they drove. "I'm angry at myself because I failed to please you. I know you've been stressed with school and I want to be your stress relief. You always know what to do when I'm stressing out about something but I can't even seem to do that right."

"Don't be upset with yourself to the point where you are ashamed."

The blonde reached over to stroke his forearm but she felt him tense, yet he didn't pull away. He stayed quiet and her hand wandered up to his bicep, and that's when he pulled away. "Don't."

"Adam-"

"Just don't." He felt a lump in his throat and gulped. Of course he felt a little bitter but it wasn't about the fact Becky was displeased, but more so with how she withheld the information from him. He wants nothing more than for her to be happy and enjoy their intimate moments—especially since she had dropped her promise of abstinence in order to be with him in that way. "I need some space."

::

It felt overwhelming that he couldn't even breathe, but he didn't care.

"Dude, you don't have to push so hard."

"I don't care."

Adam planted his feet flatter onto the floor, as he gripped his hands on the barbell, and adjusted his back on the mat. There was a need to release his bad energy through working out and he couldn't help but be rough on himself.

Brian's eyes watched as his friend seemed to be pushing himself on another level. It was concerning but he knew why it was. As much as he didn't want Becky's comments to get to him, they did. Not on a level of fragile masculinity but just the fact he was feeling rather dysphoric and Becky was his go to for it.

Christina stood with Brian and watched how he rubbed his wrists, already feeling the pain from too much wait on the barbell. "Should we get Becky?"

"Probably..." Brian had never witnessed his dysphoria first hand but Adam always spoke to him about it. Whenever he was feeling out of place in his body, he would work out and try to form that connection within himself. Now witnessing it firsthand, he had no idea what to do.

It was about fifteen minutes later, when the blonde walked through the door of the planet fitness in search of her boyfriend. She found Brian quickly, "What's going on?"

His brown eyes looked in the direction of Adam who was crouched against the wall, looking almost zoned out. His cheeks were red since he had been working out in a sweater and sweats.

It was a quick second before she was in front of him, kneeling on the ground. His eyes watched her and he gulped when she reached for the zipper of his sweater. "It's just me, Adam, look at me and not my hands." She whispered to him as she got his sweater unzipped.

Becky knew exactly what to do to make him feel at ease, and it was her presence. Adam looked into her eyes as he continued to be silent and felt her fingers run along his chest. "You're here with me, Adam. Now, focus on my hands." Her slender fingers ran through his sweaty hair and dragged down his face to his neck.

It was a relief to hear him breathe out as her fingers made way to his chest and down his stomach.

Christina watched in amazement how Adam was completely entranced by Becky's eyes. She had never seen Adam in such a state where she didn't know what to say or do. He was never one to wallow in low set esteem so when she saw Adam finally smile at Becky, Brian and her felt relief.

* * *

_SORRY for the long wait. ive finally posted all the chapters i had written so now updates will constantly be slow since now i have to come up with what to write, write it down, rewrite it etc etc. hope you enjoy. i know the end of the story is coming soon as i have run out of things to write and slowly am losing interest in this story as ive become incredibly busy. feel free to pitch ideas or send a message with ideas with what you want or want to see. otherwise this story will end in some chapters or so. thank you. x_


	67. Spring Break II: Part V

Adam unlocked the front door and stepped into the silence of his apartment.

It was so strange for him to be here entirely alone. It was always noisy with either one of the guys around or Becky, but at the moment it was filled with emptiness. Setting his bag down, he quickly went to the kitchen to grab a cup of water. It was insane how high the temperature had been lately, but he couldn't get himself to wear anything but a long sleeve shirt.

His mind wandered to his girlfriend as the water poured into the cup. Deciding the water could wait, he took out his phone and sent a quick text to his girlfriend; hoping she would answer.

_Adam (01:30 PM)_

_Just got here… it's so quiet. _

There was doubt in his mind that she would reply since Becky had been unimpressed by his decision to leave the beach house and go back to his apartment. It was evident he was feeling a sort of discomfort since his brother had left and Becky's distance from him wasn't making him feel any better.

It felt lonesome, and it seemed that the feeling followed him to his apartment as he was wrapped in a sense of neglect. Moments like these, where he would lie down on the couch, he would miss his purring friend-Flurry. It still brought him pain that they had to give her away because of an allergy Adam had. Becky's parents weren't willing to take her in, so they had no choice.

"What to do?" Adam sighed to himself and grinned once spotting the Xbox remote. Grabbing it, he couldn't help but remember in high school how he'd always be playing and in tournaments. Becky wouldn't be here until tomorrow, Sunday, so now he had all day to play. With all the negatives of being alone, he had to look at the cup half full.

Putting on his headphones and setting his feet on the table, he was prepared for a busy day.

::

"So he left?" Brian perked a brow to Becky as they grabbed their lemonade on the boardwalk. The blonde nodded, and he felt shocked that Adam went back home. "Why?"

"He didn't feel comfortable, I guess."

Christina pushed up her sunglasses and gazed at Becky. "Why didn't you go with him?" Becky shrugged, and Christina gave Leslie a knowing look. After the gym incident, it was clear Adam wasn't in the right head space. He had been by Drew's side the whole break, and as soon as he left, she noticed a drift in his attitude.

The friends found a picnic table to sit at and drank their lemonade in silence for a few seconds before Brain let his curiosity get the best of him. "What happened with the hotel?"

"The hotel..." Becky tensed her jaw, and her mind wandered to the conversation they had before he left.

_"Adam, can you stop packing for a second so we can talk about this?"_

_The brown haired boy looked up as he folded his clothes neatly into his bag. He picked up the habit as Becky hated wrinkled up clothes. "I want to go, Becks, I don't feel right staying here, and I'm not enjoying myself, so I rather go home."_

_"We can go to the hotel like you wanted." Becky stayed seated on the bed as she reached for his hand to stop his movements but she felt him tense. "I know I didn't agree with it-"_

_"And you still don't. You think it's a dumb idea that I, for some reason, want to get away with you for some alone time." His anger was flaring as he had been persistent about staying at a hotel for days now._

_Becky bit her lip and immediately sensed the defensive tone in his voice. "I told you I don't want to be intimate rig-"_

_"It's not about sex!" Adam shook his head with a baffled expression. "You think I want to have sex when I feel like absolute crap right now? I can't tolerate looking at myself in the mirror, let alone having sex with you. I just want to talk to you, to lounge around without everyone around us, but for some reason, you don't get it."_

_"Babe, it's not that..." She drifted, and she could tell he wasn't listening any longer. The packing got hastier and messier that he nearly forgot half his things. There were no words exchanged as he zipped up the bag and shared eye contact with her for a second. _

_She waited as if hoping for him to say something, anything, but he didn't. Adam's blue eyes looked away from hers, and he was out the door. _

Becky played with her straw and squinted her eyes as she felt the gleam of the sun. "We couldn't come to terms with it." She pushed her sunglasses down and met Brian's gaze, knowing he probably knew more about the story than the girls did. As much as she liked to keep them on the same page as Adam's best friend, this was something more sensitive.

They shared knowing looks and knew to move past the subject. Her mind was clouded with so many things; she hadn't noticed that her friends were getting up to leave.

"Hey, do you guys mind walking back to the beach house? I need to go get something before we leave tomorrow." Her friends looked at Becky with a brief moment of confusion but nodded nonetheless.

She was grateful that her group knew her well when she needed her alone time. Becky felt a sense of warmth of her friends of four years, loving how they knew her more than she knew herself sometimes. They wouldn't question it and let it be since Becky was a complicated person at times. On the way to her car, she checked her phone and saw Adam's text. It was straightforward and generic; he was apparently scared to say more.

Eventually, she made it to her destination. Searching for the right aisle was easy for her since she had become accustomed to purchasing the condoms for Adam since he would forget on a daily. Her line of sight went past the protection and reached for what she came for.

Unfortunately, there were so many brands; she was clueless on what she needed. Her anxiety rose as she felt scared and alone doing this on her own. It was a heavy burden on her shoulders as her fingers skimmed on what brand to purchase. She swore for a second there was a ping of regret of how fast and how intimate her and Adam had become, but she knew in the bottom of her heart she loved it.

Adam was always so careful and gentle, always caressing her and kissing her as if it was the last time they were to be intimate. And when she pushed, he would become dominate and aggressive which she found enduring—leading to the recklessness that every teenager probably encountered in their youth.

One night, in particular, came to mind, and she sighed, her fingers settling on a pack of two. _Results in two minutes, _Becky read to herself and rolled her eyes. It would have taken less than two minutes for Adam to have put on a condom. She gulped hoping those moments of pleasure she wouldn't come to regret.

::

Becky's heart was pounding as she looked her reflection in the mirror.

The box rested unopened in her hands as she was too scared to do it alone; she couldn't do it alone. There was a weight on her shoulders as she carried this burden around, not wanting Adam to worry about her. The only reason she worried is that she was late, no other signs, but it's best to be safe than sorry.

Earlier she had gulped down plenty of water, but no one questioned as they knew how Becky like to get her crazy amount of water during the day. Now it was late and even though her friends were out of the house enjoying their last night she was unable to do so. It felt almost strange to go out without Adam linked around her, not that she had grown dependent—she just missed him. And she had pushed him away by not wanting him to worry.

It was a mistake.

She exhaled a loud breath as she reached for her phone, her fingers clicking open the message he had sent early that she failed to reply to. Her hesitation increased as she didn't know whether to call him or not. What if she was just paranoid and this possibility gets him excited? What if it's a positive and it scares him off? As much as she wants to protect him, before she knows it, her phone is dialing her boyfriend.

"Hello?" His voice is distant, almost distracted, but he was quick to answer.

"Adam." Becky leans her back against the sink, and she hears some shuffling on the other end of the phone.

"Babe, hey!" His voice now comes off as excited and totally present, something she needs. "I didn't know it was you; I was preoccupied with this tournament."

Becky chuckles softly and nods, even though he can't see her. She wants to ask more of it and what he's been doing but she'll chicken out and push the thought away as she's done for the past week. "Adam…" She hears his breathing as he waits for her calmly to continue and she feels relief at how he must already know something important is about to be brought up. "I'm late."

Silence fills the line, and Becky tenses her jaw as she waits for him to say something, anything. And unlike the day before when he left, he did just that. "I'm here for you. We'll get through this, positive or negative." Tears she didn't know where coming leaked down her eyes and her cheeks, even with the smile on her face. "I'm glad you told me."

"I was scared—I am scared." Becky's voice is strained, and she doesn't bother to wipe her tears, the privacy of the bathroom feeling like a blessing in disguise. "I wanted to tell you sooner, but I was sure it wasn't a big deal, but now I want to be sure it isn't. I didn't want to get your hopes up."

"Becks, don't worry about me. I'm here, and I'm not leaving. If you are pregnant, we'll figure it out. If you're not, at least we have a funny story to tell." She found her lip tugging into a smile at his playful joke. A brief moment of silence filled the line again as Becky stared at the pregnancy test on the table. Her mouth opened to speak again, but Adam got his words through before she could, "Is this why you were distant with me?"

Guilt filled her core, and she gulped, again nodding as if he were there. "It was. I… I shouldn't have done that to you." As much as she preferred to have this conversation in person, Adam needed to hear this. "It's scary because our relationship is still sort of new, in a way. We're in this limbo because we're dating and kind of engaged, but we're still struggling with trust, Adam."

"I get it, Becky, don't worry. I'm not going to freak out, well not until we're sure." His voice remained steady, and it eased Becky's nerves, finding her body reacting to all the water she had drunk. "Are you going to take the test?"

She bit her lip and met her eyes in the reflection of the mirror. "No, not until I'm with you."

* * *

_ well, half way through my summer! Enjoy and sorry for grammatic errors &amp; such since I tried quickly to put this up. Ive decided this story won't have too many chapters left to it. I will skip around now, with the remaining chapters being lengthy as I can make them. Thank you for still sticking around xx _


	68. Author's Note

_AUTHOR'S NOTE:_

Hey guys, sorry for the false update as this is only an author's note. I rarely do this, always leaving a story without notice or simply delete the story but I found it wrong to do so without posting a note - especially because I am, and will continue to frequently update my other story _Continuation._

I just wanted to let you know I am putting this story on hold, it has been on hold for some time now as I was hoping to gain some inspiration or motivation to write and add on to it but I haven't. I have found a greater focus on my other story, continuously writing for it and analyzing what to do next with it. That is a reason why I have decided to stop this story (for now) as I felt like it could have been done differently and with more justice, finding myself writing out the chapters and posting them without thinking of where it can lead to next. I did enjoy writing this story in the beginning, and I had a plot planned out, but eventually I dragged on story lines or added unnecessary drama that I wish I could fix without having to redo the **_whole _**thing. I regret some plots and chapters, as reading through it now I don't feel that it is right.

On that note, I want to thank you guys for reading this story and for the continued support. Especially a number of reviews (it's a lot I never suspected to get so many.) Along with the anon's who continued to praise the writing and the story, I know there's someone who always comments so thank you very much! Thanks again for all with this story, I have enjoyed the journey. I might write some one-shots with Becky and Adam further into the future as I don't have a place for them now in this story but do have the urgency to write them. I will remain on this site as I have my other story, which I love writing and I feel like I am improving my writing skills!

Again, thank you so much for the story and the support. For now, I will mark the story as complete, but it does not mean that in the future I won't randomly add a chapter and decide to continue.

_xx._


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